Kings Roofie Hurricanes, 5-2
-The Kings defeated the Carolina Hurricanes last night, 5-2, on the backs of Alexander Frolov and Randy "The Date Rapist" Jones*. The game was close until the middle of the third but the outcome was never really in doubt; the Kings were pushing the action almost the entire game and simply had more skill than the depleted Hurricanes line-up.

*What the hell kind of sleaze bag is this guy? He has some sort of weird crusty mustache thing going on. He just looks like the type of guy that enjoys taking girls' virginity. I get the feeling he and Justin Williams would not look out of place at the party Jennifer Connelly provided the entertainment for at the end of Requiem for a Dream.
Alexander Frolov had 2 assists on the night, a pretty fake slap shot and pass to Justin Williams that led to Randy "High School Gym Teacher" Jones' goal, and another beautiful assist on Wayne Simmonds' goal to ice the game. Frolov collected the puck behind the Hurricanes net and faked like he was going to take it out wide; when the defenders came to him, he slipped it between them to a wide open Meat Train in front of the net. It was a solid night all around for Frolov and he was congratulated on his play by Terry Murray after the game... wait, no he wasn't. What a surprise.
Randy "Your Girlfriend's Co-Worker who Always Touches Her Back" Jones, meawhile, ended up with 2 points on the night in his Kings debut. Jones filled in for Sean O'Donnell, which makes sense since Sean O'Donnell is old and could probably use a break every now and then. The Kings will still use O'Donnell most of the time because he's their rock on the penalty kill and provides security for the rest of the Kings' defenders, but it's nice to know the Kings have someone like Randy "Guy Who Volunteers to Ref AYSO Games Even Though He Has No Kids" Jones to help out on defense if someone gets hurt.
Erik Ersberg played last night in Jonathan Quick's stead and was... okay, I guess. He allowed 2 goals on 24 shots, but the first goal was pretty bad to let in. I'll let him slide on the 2nd, since it was more of a screw up by the defense than Ersberg that led to the goal. He didn't play well enough to justify playing him over Jonathan Quick, but he played well enough to at least let Quick know that he needs to step it up.
Overall, the Kings won a game they should win. Hooray! Now on to a game I am really stoked for: the Thrashers, tomorrow night. Just think of it: Kopitar v. Kovalchuk (if he plays); Doughty v. Bogosian; Fro v. Maxim; Randy Jones v. her unwillingness to drink anything offered to her. Should be an awesome game.
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I cursed Ersberg name yesterday when he let in that first goal. When I watched NHL on the Fly this morning, though, I noticed that it deflected off the defenseman’s stick and changed direction, which I didn’t pick up on. So it really wasn’t a bad goal.
by Nut on Nov 12, 2009 1:10 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
It was a solid night all around for Frolov and he was congratulated on his play by Terry Murray after the game… wait, no he wasn’t. What a surprise.
Well I guess I’m the asshole.
The West Coast is the Best Coast.
by RudyKelly on Nov 12, 2009 1:33 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Randy “Guy Who Volunteers to Ref AYSO Games Even Though He Has No Kids” Jones
haha………this and the whole build up to it. quality shit, man.
hooked on quack
by tu madre on Nov 12, 2009 3:04 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
Randy “Guy who coached Theron Fleury as a youth” Jones
by Nut on Nov 12, 2009 4:17 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Hee, Crusty Moustache!
Wow, I can’t believe he said something nice about Fro either (eventually). I love ‘em both, but I can’t help but picture Murray like this nowadays:

All shaking his head and disapproving and such…
Whoa, what a second, I can’t play hockey with you, I have to solve a murder.
by Niesy on Nov 12, 2009 4:57 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
He just looks like the type of guy that enjoys taking girls’ virginity.
Always figured you’d find that to be a hilarious quality.
Lol, just kidding. This post was a complete lie.
by brokenyard on Nov 12, 2009 6:51 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
The Randy Jonesisms are hilarious
I'm nobody's fool, least of all yours
by BoulderDodger on Nov 12, 2009 7:06 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I think this post wins the coveted “Most sexual predator jokes” trophy. Fantastic work.
Tonight was probably a good night to start Ersberg, Carolina being all terrible and what not, but I couldn’t help dreading a third period collapse. That power play goal by Jones seemed to be the end of it for them, however, since Carolina barely got anything going thereafter to challenge Ersberg.
Unrelated, but do you think Randy Jones has to register in every town the Kings visit or just in Los Angeles?
by GK Larsen on Nov 13, 2009 10:45 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

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