Sharks Gameday: I Heart Jeremy Roenick

For the few years this blog has existed it has been uneven in it’s coverage of all 3 California teams which is understandable as the process to find dedicated bloggers for each team has taken time to sort it self out, but this year it seems everyone has stepped it up to really bring this blog to a new level. So I want to thank all of the bloggers here for your work and giving us California hockey fans some great perspectives on our favorite teams.

A special thanks to Mike Chen for helping represent the best hockey team in California. Keep up the sweet game day posts.

GO SHARKS!

Oh noooooooooooooooo

I wouldn’t piss on Jeremy Roenick if he were on fire; not at first, anyway. First I’d go to the store and pick up some asparagus, some Monster energy drink and some Axe Body Spray. I’d eat the Asparagus and swallow it down with the Monster energy drink and then go back to where a hopefully smoldering Jeremy Roenick is lying. After his body has been burned down to ashes, I’d piss all over him, concentrating mostly where I think his mouth would have been. (It’d be tough, because he’s all ashes, but I’d give it my best shot.) Then I’d spray him down with the Axe Body Spray and hide behind a rock or building so that when the coroners got there they’d exclaim, “Boy, Jeremy Roenick sure does smell terrible!”

Then I’d complain about the cut of my skates to distract from the fact that I’m old and suck at hockey.