BoC Gameday—Counting on the Continued Wrongness of Monkeys and Forecheckers
San Jose Sharks (1st in west) at Anaheim Ducks (8th in west)
Ducks lead series 2-1, JavaGeek Odds: ANA 55%
Fear the Fin, which has changed its name back from "Fear the Win"
(Author's note: I was going to write a decent post last night, but instead I played host to visiting James O'Brien. After playoff hockey was over, I introduced O'B to the wacky world of Mr. Show -- good times. But as a result, I'm hurriedly posting this morning with a topic I've had in my back pocket for a few days.)
Back in the 2007 postseason, when I was a young, optimistic, and cupless blogger, I quickly discovered two trends that served as a quick litmus test of how the Ducks would fare in upcoming playoff series -- the playoff predictions of TSN's Maggie the Monkey as well as SBN's Forechecker. While both prognosticators use wildly different approaches to their predictions (Maggie spins a wheel and Forechecker writes a prediction formula that weights results by recency), they do have one important commonality: ever since the Ducks changed their team name and uniform in the summer of '06, they both have picked incorrectly in every playoff series the Ducks have played. Take a look at their Anaheim-related performance over the past two postseasons:

| Year | Rd | Series | Maggie's Pick | Forechecker's Pick | Series Winner |
| 2007 | 1 | (2) ANA vs. (7) MIN | Minnesota | Minnesota | Anaheim |
| 2007 | 2 | (2) ANA vs. (3) VAN | Vancouver | Vancouver | Anaheim |
| 2007 | 3 | (1) DET vs. (2) ANA | Detroit | Detroit | Anaheim |
| 2007 | 4 | (2) ANA vs. (4) OTT | Ottawa | Ottawa | Anaheim |
| 2008 | 1 | (4) ANA vs. (5) DAL | Anaheim | Anaheim | Dallas |
| 2009 | 1 | (1) SJS vs. (8) ANA | San Jose | San Jose | ??? |
I've also included their picks for this year's first-round BoC series -- two potentially-damning votes of confidence for the Sharks. Now I don't particularly want to bash either playoff predictor -- outside of their Anaheim picks I believe both have done very well with their methods -- but I did want to throw one more karmic log on the fire.
There are certainly several more practical and less simian-pick-dependent keys to tonight's game for the Ducks -- taking a lead, re-establishing the PK, keeping composure -- but these keys haven't really changed over the first few games of the series. All three games thus far have gone into the third period tied -- if the Ducks can keep that trend up, then hopefully the power of the incorrect monkey and the misled Forechecker can push tonight's game in Anaheim's favor.

Git 'er done.
Unfortunately, Thursdays being the shitty-scheduled days that they are, I won't be around for the comments tonight, Still, feel free to stop in and comment on tonight's pivotal G4, which will either give the Ducks a stranglehold on this series or will prompt a best-of-three series starting Saturday.
Prediction: Referees get booed.
Go Ducks.
Mike's update 10:00: It's a bad schedule day all around for the BoC folks so I'm piggybacking on Sleek's post.
Tactical analysis: keep doing shit well and skating hard. Torrey Mitchell's ice time should go up today, giving Todd McLellan more options to mix and match his forwards. Putting Marcel Goc with the Joe Thornton line in the third period was an effective defense/offense combination, and I think we're all starting to appreciate Patrick Marleau's two-way play as McLellan's role for him this series becomes more evident.
Fan analysis: keep doing shit well and skating hard. I know there's a mini-FTF/BOC meet up before the game and I wish I could join you guys. Hopefully everyone's still drinking buddies regardless of the outcome.
Prediction: FTF/BOC crew drink a lot of beer and yell incoherently.
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good post…..makes me feel better…
should be a wild one tonite….you know better PK would have made the difference on tuesday…we would have won 3-2…so..ducks…can u fix that one thing?…thats not asking for much
looking forward to seeing anyone at the game..i wont be hard to miss…fedoria hat..big goat…drunk as fuck..think ill wear my tribute to sleek…with a green shirt since hes not going to the game
GO DUCKS!!!!!
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 8:11 AM PDT reply actions
Nice. I have nothing bad to say about believing in green shirt karma.
I’m pretty jealous — seems a lot of people I know will be at tonight’s game, including my dad. Meanwhile I’ll be keeping abreast on my cell phone.
Oh well, it worked out OK in G1, I suppose.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
try not to wear the green short to that pool hall (unless u have nothing else clean)…dont want to have to pull out the another bad joke..“hey man…looks like we shop at the same store”……ive been dialing up bad jokes all over this blog….i might be struck down by the bad jokes god…
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 8:25 AM PDT up reply actions
damn it i said short….need to cut anyone off before they call me on it…as far as I know…nobody in there right mind would ever wear green shorts….except maybe a sun tanning leprechaun
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 8:28 AM PDT up reply actions
Heh, we’ll see. I will probably be wearing it for karmic and recognition purposes, but I’ll try to make the repeated point that I bought it at a different store from yours.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
yea might want to wear a sign around our neck….says me and spade are not nerd losers who call each other so we can dress the same…
mine does say guiness…but both our shirts are faded…so might not be obvious to the naked eye…dont want anyone to get any ideas
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 8:47 AM PDT up reply actions
I really shouldn’t overhype it — my cell phone is mostly very retarded. But it does have online access for ESPN scoreboards, so that’s basically what I’ll be periodically checking.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
my roomates phone…alerts him anytime his favortie team..scores..or has any news…i need to get that shit
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:16 AM PDT up reply actions
WOW!! Even I got the joke right away…and I’m not interested in having breasts on my phone!
You guys are slippin!!!
GO DUCKS!! DUCKSandPUCKS.com
yea im slipping..i didn get that either….
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:27 AM PDT up reply actions
Sorry, poor joke.
Don’t believe in poor jokes — that’s defeatist talk.
I’m just slow today — nobody bothered to make coffee in our office today, and it’s slowing me down.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
nobody bothered to make coffee in our office today, and it’s slowing me down.
and heaven forbid you got up to make it! :)
GO DUCKS!! DUCKSandPUCKS.com
that sounds like work…what fun is that?
speaking of which…1 hr and half till im off and running…
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:34 AM PDT up reply actions
Hehe… How can I not link to a glowing host review like this?
All signs point to Earl Sleek being a bad ass.
Now if I could only get that message into one of those magic 8-balls…
http://www.battleofcali.com/
My wife introduced me to Mr. Show and David Cross years ago but ever since GTA: San Andreas, all I can ever think of is when you have to pilot the RC helicopter for David Cross’ character. Every GTA has one stupid-ass mission that frustrates me to the point of not finishing the game, and that did it for me on San Andreas.
by Mike Chen on Apr 23, 2009 9:53 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
That goddamn mission took me and my old roommate FOREVER to fucking finish. I completely sympathize with the frustration (though if you ever get re-inspired, there are some pretty awesome missions after San Fierro).
http://www.battleofcali.com/
I can’t exactly remember what David Cross says every time you fail but the inflection of it is burned into my head.
One correction: I didn’t meet my frustration mission on GTA4 yet, I just stopped playing it because Metal Gear Solid 4 came out, then Fallout 3, then Bioshock. Once I finish Killzone 2, I can return to GTA4 to find something to bitch about.
The only “tip” I can remember on that mission is by the time we finally finished it, we were killing a lot of the bad guys by landing the RC plane, shooting a bunch of them, and taking off to pursue the others. But there’s zero time for any wasted motion — has to be done pretty damn flawlessly.
And there’s probably other better methods.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Holy cow...
It’s amazing to believe some folks pay attention to these things!
Actually, I haven’t used the model that I employed in 2007 since then, the last two years have been more of an ad-hoc approach. Perhaps my contempt for Chris Pronger is just coming through?
More fun than a stick to the face!
On the Forecheck is SB Nation's blog covering the Nashville Predators.
It’s amazing to believe some folks pay attention to these things!
What can I say? I’m a sucker for useless trends that offer false hope.
Thanks for not getting angry at getting lumped together with a wheel-spinning monkey — the only similarity I meant to imply was the picks themselves. (Maggie, on the other hand, seemed pretty pissed about the side-by-side comparison. Dumb monkey.)
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Mr. Show!
I’d never seen its Wikipedia page until you linked to it, but this line has me laughing uncontrollably:
The show contains a strong, confident contrarian viewpoint that at times mocks or satirizes organized religion or global capitalism.I’m picturing rounds and rounds of Wiki re-edits before arriving at that careful statement.
Lighthouse Hockey: Side effects may include Weight gain and frequent game loss.
We jumped around the seasons a bit last night, but I think I gave O’B a solid-enough intro:
1. The Joke, The Musical — Government Art Funding episode.
2. Musmayostardayonnaise — the Dr. X Telethon.
3. The Lost Episode — Drugachusetts.
Enough that he understand the pace/format now, at least.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Some day...
I’m going to be adept at ripping video from a DVD on my computer and setting it up so I can make one scene available for myself in writing from Mr. Show and it’s this and I just need the parts with David Cross:
Not sure entirely what project you have in mind, but I can assure you I’m still a techno-idiot who can’t help you get there.
“NERVER!”
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Just the stuff with Cross yelling “NEVER” is all I need. I’ve written more than a few things this year where I just wanted to insert that clip to hammer home the point. It’s tough to write all that out without having to cite your inspiration and explain/kill the joke.
NENVERINO! FURRY! GRRRRR!
Mr Show was great. But David Cross’ true genius didn’t shine through until Arrested Development. Genius.
Don't bRuin your life. Make love with a Trojan
I like AD, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not one of my two favorite shows in the history of television.
(Yeah, I’m still that much a sucker for The A-Team).
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Maggies results for the Sharks
2006
SJ vs. NSH: SJ
SJ vs. EDM: EDM
2007
SJ vs. NSH: NSH (wrong)
SJ vs. DET: DET
2008
SJ vs. CGY: SJ
SJ vs. DAL: SJ (wrong)
So i guess Maggie is only 66% right for the sharks, what a stupid monkey. My distaste for monkeys goes back to the 2006 world series with the giants and angels.
Also, didn’t look for the forecheck numbers b/c they weren’t as easy to find.
My distaste for monkeys goes back to the 2006 world series with the giants and angels.
2002? But you shouldn’t get in the habit of having me correct baseball-related comments. I really only know this fact because I haven’t followed a lick of baseball since that series.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
monkeys throw there own poo and maul humans….how can u not like monkeys!!
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions
imagine your team winning by a sizable margin, in the final stages of the championship game.
all of a sudden, your opponent conjures up an image of . . . a monkey jumping feverishly up and down . . . and it works.
I think what sealed the deal for the angels (whom I hate but glad they won cuz I hate the giants more) was them playing “jump around” by house of pain….while that monkey was hoping….monkey+house of pain song = ralley
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:50 AM PDT up reply actions
thats were the angels started going downhill…the baseball gods punished them for those loud annoying fucking things….“stick to the monkey”
“stick to the monkey” is a quote to live by
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:55 AM PDT up reply actions
Probably happened after ’02, then, because they seemed to be a big deal in that World Series run.
I remember I actually attended the first game where Thunderstix made a “Big A” appearance — it was some series opener against Seattle — and we were relentless on those things. I think I broke three different thundersticks before the seventh inning.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
i wanted to stick everyone single one of those thundersticks up those fans asses…with no lube!!!
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:58 AM PDT up reply actions
Go Dodgers
Just leave Heidi Androl alone!
by DodgerBlueBalls on Apr 23, 2009 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions
yup go dodgers….what happent he last 2 nights? our pitching gone to hell….well at least were hitting…like we have never have before..its amazing..
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 12:32 PM PDT up reply actions
Yeah there’s no weak link in our lineup (as long as Juan Pierre only pinch runs). If Kershaw and Billingsley pitch like they should and they other starters don’t suck too much (maybe too much to ask) then who knows…
yea…they should try to pick someone up though…anyone….sombody..that just allows 3 runs minimum..consentantly…cuz looks like the offense is good for 4 or 5 runs a game…i cant belive im tlaking about my same dodgers…wow this is so weird
Yippe ky yea...mini sirlion burgers!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions
caution hockey related comment!!
RC gotta stop matching up our 2nd line to the sharks 2nd line..or whatever line clowe is on…i know i harped about this earlier…but fuck he didnt listen to me iw as screaming at the tv on tuesday…and it lead to a goal…3rd line should take on clowe…and try to get the 2nd line agisnt there 3rd line.(moen line)
and obviously watch boyle at the back door on the Pk
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:48 AM PDT reply actions
caution hockey related comment!!
Totally inappropriate, dude. This is a monkey-discussion site. :)
http://www.battleofcali.com/
i know i know…thought i could slip it by….
curious george was also a monkey..i always liked to think he was curious about womans vagina
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:54 AM PDT up reply actions
curious in what way?? taste … smell … feel? … (shrugs) … I should shut up.
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
by ang6666 on Apr 23, 2009 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions
well..if george was like me when i was curious..then it would be feel…
I got metal balls that "clang" when I walk
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 11:59 AM PDT up reply actions
Hang in there Spade, I did not touch my first Vag until I was 16. Some guys take a little longer, but don’t give up bro.
benefits of having one, you can touch whenever you wish … ha ha!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
by ang6666 on Apr 23, 2009 1:10 PM PDT up reply actions
GO CLOCK GOOOOOO!!!!
10 mins sleek!! im outta here
Yippe ky yea...mini sirlion burgers!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Apr 23, 2009 12:51 PM PDT reply actions
I leave this site for three hours and all the talk turns from David Cross and Grand Theft Auto to monkeys and vaginas.
I have no idea if that jinxes either side for tonight.
For your distractionary amusement...

Taken from an Anaheim Ducks site from Brasil, who took it from me. :)
But hey, this looks like some hard-hitting game commentary. Nicely done, Brasil!
E o jogador principal para essas conquistas até agora na série se chama Jonas Hiller. Muito foi contestado sobre quem deveria ser usado nos playoffs e muitas incógnitas surgiram sobre esse assunto. JS Giguere era tido pela imprensa como o goleiro titular nos playoffs, por ter vasta experiência e saber atuar muito bem nos momentos mais críticos de um jogo de playoff, só que nessa temporada ele não dava nem um pouco de confiança ao time. Nisso tudo entra Hiller, ótimo goleiro reserva que atuou muito bem como backup de Giggy na temporada passada e que nesta havia pego o cargo de titular atuando consistentemente e absolutamente bem.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Portuguese, Chen!
Yeah, I have no idea. I think it says to shoot high on Hiller.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
according to babel fish -
E the main player for these conquests so far in the series if calls Jonas Hiller. Much was contested on who would have to be used in playoffs and many incognito had appeared on this subject. JS Giguere was had for the press as the titular goleiro in playoffs, for having vast experience and knowing to act very well at the moments most critical of a game of playoff, only that in this season it did not give nor a little reliable to the teams. In this everything enters Hiller, excellent goleiro reserve that acted very as well as backup of Giggy in the last season and that in this it had I catch the bearer position absolutely acting consistently and well.
(shrugs)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
by ang6666 on Apr 23, 2009 3:13 PM PDT up reply actions
and that in this it had I catch the bearer position absolutely acting consistently and well.
I think Ilya Bryzgalov used this sentence once…
http://www.battleofcali.com/
I still have a year before I can drink alcohol........
does root beer count as long as I yell incoherently?
I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Going back a week or so...
Number of times Sharks get called “dirty,” “cheap,” “goons,” or “thugs” for doing what Murray did in the last minute of game 4: 0
Number of times Ducks get called “dirty,” cheap," “goons,” or “thugs” if they did what Murray did in the last minute of game 4: 999,897,029,384,876,060,499,785,950,291,765,869,200,294,065,769,236,904,854,837.
Number of times Sharks get called "dirty," "cheap," "goons," or "thugs" for doing what Murray did in the last minute of game 4: 0
Number of times Ducks get called "dirty," cheap," "goons," or "thugs" if they did what Murray did in the last minute of game 4: 999,897,029,384,876,060,499,785,950,291,765,869,200,294,065,769,236,904,854,837.
Ding ding ding. We have a winner.
Don't bRuin your life. Make love with a Trojan
Re: The Cartoon
Will you be posting a Duckie jumping over a shark, Fonzie-style, for Game 5?
SNN Sports - A theoretical Oilers blog (i.e. theoretically, I write stuff there)

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