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Rudy Kelly's Home for Wayward Teams: What's on Sleek's TV?

(Surprise, kids!  Sure, Ducks have been eliminated, but Rudy has set up a nice environment here for us miserable losers, and finally I can offer my first contribution -- a plug for a TV show I've been glued to.)

Outside of watching hockey, I have a few regular viewing habits -- one of them is that I'm a sucker for nature survivor shows. Now I'm no outdoorsman by any stretch, but I certainly enjoy watching other people battle the elements for basic survival necessities which I laughingly take for granted. On Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls tackles nature head-on, and while his enthusiasm and techniques are great, he's a bit of a show-off -- he'll gladly jump into some quicksand to demonstrate how to wriggle out.  On Survivorman, Les Stroud has more of an "outlast" style -- he may go hungry for a few days, but he's done that plenty of times.  It is nice that he carries his own camera, though.  Both adventurers offer amazing locations and for sure fascinating shows, but their situations are robbed a bit of urgency -- by becoming career survivors, we're all too aware of how capable these guys are.  When they find food sources or shelter, it's cool but not crucial -- they've probably had it worse some other time.

Not so with the subjects of my new fascination, Out of the Wild: The Alaska Experiment. It's compelling as fuck.  Basic story: nine volunteers have agreed to spend a month-plus surviving a trek across the Alaskan landscape.  After three days of basic survival training, the group is dropped off in a remote location and must trek between a series of checkpoints, which range from a cabin to a crashed plane.  They must provide their own food, chop their own wood, make their own decisions, and see if they can make it out alive.  Nobody knows the distance they'll travel or the time it will take to complete.  Each member is given a GPS locator which, if activated, can summon a rescue helicopter and take them out of the game.  And best of all?  There is no prize for completing -- it's all about pride.

Now this is actually the second iteration of The Alaska Experiment, there was one last year where groups of people who knew each other tried to stick out a winter in fixed locations.  It also was pretty cool in that most teams were regularly fucked over and starving, but I think this year's concept is a bit more focused.  Everybody came into this group as a stranger, and they're all working together on a pre-routed trek.  The TV production can be a bit chintzy, but the effort on empty stomachs is damn real.  And the exuberation and relief when this ragtag group of self-proclaimed "city slickers" does nab itself a meal after days of futility?  That's real, dude.  Seriously -- they're going to live another day, against a lot of odds.  And every time it kicks ass.

Here's the team of volunteers that went in:

Alaskaexperiment_medium
Nine volunteers started the experiment, and they're already down to five.

After the jump, a quick run-through of the volunteers and to give you a quick catch-up on this season, each person's claim to fame through the first five episodes (two and a half weeks of nature's ass-kicking).

Star-divide

The list of volunteers, and a brief claim to fame:

  • Trish, school bus driver. Claim to fame: Trish has been a good hunter for the team, and seems to be a good listener in the group.  Seemingly she is regularly the last person that people talk to before they leave the team.
  • Jake, horse trainer. Claim to fame: recorded the team's first and only kill over the first four days of the experiment when he threw his shoe at a fieldmouse.  Jacob is definitely the glue holding the team together in its rough patches.
  • Dan, cop. Claim to fame: made the largest kill for the team when he walked up to a porcupine and shot it in the face.  Left the team when lack of food had him bed-ridden for a few days and finally made him faint.
  • Carolyn, lawyer.  Claim to fame: the team's cook has turned many bizarre forms of animal into edible and calorie-maximizing stews.  A real trooper who probably is the best narrator out of the group, I'm not sure if she's complained about anything yet.
  • Fredric, customer service rep.  Claim to fame: every group needs its slowest member, and Fredric was definitely that out of the gate.  But Fred took slow-down to a new comedic level when during a river crossing, (I shit you not) he somehow managed to spray himself in the face with bear mace.  Dropped out after the second camp.
  • Joe, fishing guide.  Claim to fame: the guy with the most outdoor experience wasn't beaten by the elements, but he found he couldn't work with the group when they all wanted to slow their pace to help Fredric.  Ironically he dropped out with Fredric after the second camp.
  • Penny Jo, body piercer.  Claim to fame: the first drop-out, also who didn't work well in a group.  I think she was too pissed off after the group split a fieldmouse eight ways and didn't save her any (it was nothing, half a bite, maybe), but she did light the first fire for the group.
  • John, housing administrator.  Claim to fame: the New Yorker is a fabulous worker and teammate, and did catch the team's second meal -- a gopher -- when he propped up a metal basin with a stick and lured it under with some nuts.  It was referred to as the "Looney Toons" solution.
  • Kimberly, personal trainer.  Claim to fame: the only person besides Jake to return from a hunt with two kills; she's turned out to be a decent teammate despite her confessed biggest challenge: surviving without an iPod.

After five episodes, the group is down to five -- Trish, Jake, Carolyn, John, and Kim -- I truly am pulling for them, and I think they've got a shot.  It's really amazing to see how much they've improved in their efficiency even in two and a half weeks.  But it's pretty critical that all five continue; I don't think they can handle another dropout -- there's too much to carry and too much to constantly do.  It's a tight-and-cooperative group now, but as the show reminds us again and again, Alaska is un-fucking-forgiving, and survival is a round-the-clock effort.

So anyways, it's a show I've been enjoying, and if you're looking for a compelling ass-kicking drama tonight but would rather see Mother Nature play the role of Detroit and foolish volunteers play the part of Chicago, tune in to the Discovery Channel and catch the next Sleek-endorsed chapter of Out of the Wild: The Alaska Experiment

Where survival is seriously in question.

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when during a river crossing, (I shit you not) he somehow managed to spray himself in the face with bear mace.

Suddenly, I decided to check this show out….

Check out my hockey blog!
http://sacrificethebody.blogspot.com/
Catch the Wings/Ducks coverage over at CycleLikeSedins!
http://wingsvducks.blogspot.com/

by IAmJoe on May 19, 2009 10:12 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Yeah, that’s definitely the highlight so far, and I can’t even really tell you how it happened. The guy had bear mace hanging from his belt, was almost across the river (knee-high, maybe), and next thing you know he’s crying and blind on the ground. It was hilarious, since the group was already pissed at him for general slowness, but it wouldn’t even make for good written comedy — it’s beyond believability.

Fred has left the group, but I think some of the remaining five’s impressive will to live comes from making fun of his moment of idiocy.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 19, 2009 10:17 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Suddenly, I decided to check this show out….

Indeed. I was laughing about the bear mace through the rest of the post, and giggled all over again when I saw your comment. That’s Reno 911-level on the believability scale. Amazing.

Lighthouse Hockey: Side effects may include Weight gain and frequent game loss.

by Dominik on May 19, 2009 10:58 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

This sounds great

But is there sex? It’s apparently TV law that every reality show needs the sex.

Seriously, thanks for this (and for making me read to the end to find out which network it’s on). I’m a fan of Man vs. Wild and Mark and Ollie and such shows, but there are so many in this realm now that it takes effort from my remote-holding hand to determine which ones are worth checking out.

Lighthouse Hockey: Side effects may include Weight gain and frequent game loss.

by Dominik on May 19, 2009 10:54 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Yeah, and if you do want a taste, I actually caught onto this show a little late, largely because they changed the title from the old “Alaska Experiment”, but I found that all five prior episodes were on my OnDemand in the Discovery Channel menus. As always, your mileage will vary with whatever OnDemand means for you.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 19, 2009 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Thanks.

As always, your mileage will vary with whatever OnDemand means for you.

Usually: “Here’s another show you might want but for technical reasons cannot have. Now won’t you bundle all of your telecom services with us? It’s been __ months since our last bankruptcy!”

Lighthouse Hockey: Side effects may include Weight gain and frequent game loss.

by Dominik on May 19, 2009 1:24 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

But is there sex? It’s apparently TV law that every reality show needs the sex.

It’s in Alaska. Of course there is! It’s just with bears and otters and elk and stuff.

I’m a big fan of Deadliest Catch. I’m dont know that I could actually do that stuff, but I’d love to give it a try.

Check out my hockey blog!
http://sacrificethebody.blogspot.com/
Catch the Wings/Ducks coverage over at CycleLikeSedins!
http://wingsvducks.blogspot.com/

by IAmJoe on May 19, 2009 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yo sir should not be allowed to speak…

ok j/k….

sorry sleek dont give a shit about these shows..but entertaining to her the wisecracks you use to describe them

ok back into my hole now

I wanna throw up on your new shoes

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on May 19, 2009 12:36 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

added some misspelling in case anyone had spade withdrawals

I wanna throw up on your new shoes

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on May 19, 2009 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

It’s cool, dude. I can’t give a damn about the Lakers — to each his own.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 19, 2009 1:44 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oh it’s on at 10pm, might just have to check this out.

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 19, 2009 12:50 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I think I will as well. The repo people on true tv was funny for 15 minutes, but then seemed staged.

Earl, in the event I find it in my on-demand for time warner, what episode is the bear mace show? I want to start there.

by Mike in OC on May 19, 2009 2:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yeah I couldnt’ get into that … just was too lame

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 19, 2009 2:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

what episode is the bear mace show?

I’m pretty sure it’s called “What did I sign up for” — it was the second episode.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 19, 2009 2:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

This show does indeed kick ass. I did a 9-day trip at Lake Powell in college with minimal comforts and all we really did was sit around with a small group of friends and bitch about how much we hated everyone else.

Oh, and I’ve been hit in the face with pepper spray and it sucks, but I still can’t figure out how you accidentally spray yourself. There’s like 9 safeties on a can of that stuff.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on May 19, 2009 2:57 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

why were you hit in the face with pepper spray??

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 19, 2009 2:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Just to do it.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on May 19, 2009 3:06 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Rudy is actually a cop

Check out my hockey blog!
http://sacrificethebody.blogspot.com/
Catch the Wings/Ducks coverage over at CycleLikeSedins!
http://wingsvducks.blogspot.com/

by IAmJoe on May 19, 2009 9:03 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

maybe it’s different when it’s for bears.

9 safteys would maybe take too long and the bear would eat you before you had time to add the seasoning.

by Mike in OC on May 19, 2009 3:10 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Also, I was really confused when I saw the headline.

Me: “Wait, did I write a post last night? My name’s right there! Holy shit, what other amazing things am I doing while asl- oh, Earl wrote it.” (*doesn’t read)

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on May 19, 2009 4:48 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I read the whole post thinking you wrote it. That damn Earl is a sneaking one. I feel we are underestimating his sneakiness.

hooked on quack

by tu madre on May 19, 2009 4:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I also read that whole thing and thought it was RK until I got to the comments.

by Mike in OC on May 19, 2009 6:51 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think the clue to it wasn’t Rudy’s post was he didn’t refer to his cock once. I was going to add adjectives there, as he always does, but then one might think I’ve actually seen it. I’m still waiting for proof of all he claims.

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 19, 2009 7:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The real clue as to the authorship of this post was when it started “Surprise, kids!” instead of “Surprise, cockfags!” — that’s usually the giveaway point.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 20, 2009 7:49 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Heh, my bad. I’m rusty on this whole “offseason” concept.

Not a bad show this week, though not the best. Carolyn is off the “never complains” list, but another week where they didn’t die — always impressive.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 19, 2009 8:12 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I checked it out. It’s decent. I set the series to record. Carolyn is losing her mind I think.

I loved the girl who was unsure about eating the salmon because she normally does not like salmon very much, a day after she had porcupine stew.

3 shots with a .410 to hit the porcupine at point blank range? 9 hookups with the same salmon before they were able to land it? Somone is going to die, that’s my prediction.

by Mike in OC on May 20, 2009 8:52 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I’ve got to check this out. As an equally un-outdoorsy type, I really dug the original Man vs. Wild before he got criticized for re-enactments. Now, he points out they’re re-enactments, removing all the contrived entertainment I once enjoyed. That makes it almost as boring as Survivorman sleeping in a truck (don’t know about Canada, but in America we call that “bum”— no TV show necessary…yet).

Anaheim Calling
http://anaheimcalling.blogspot.com

by Arthur from Anaheim Calling on May 19, 2009 6:54 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Speaking of re-enactments and catching this stuff on video

…am I the only one equally interested in the lives of the camera operators on such shows? I picture them having more creature comforts and dangling pieces of shrimp and fifths of whiskey in front of the contestants’ eyes.

Or perhaps a cameraman’s journal: “Day 11: I can’t believe these boring, whiny idiots are still alive, yet my director tells me I have until sundown to capture something that makes them seem interesting.”

Lighthouse Hockey: Side effects may include Weight gain and frequent game loss.

by Dominik on May 20, 2009 8:51 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The show that has me asking questions about the camera crew’s involvement is “Mantracker” — where that cowboy and his pal chase down 2 fugitives using dirt tracks and the like.

For sure there’s a camera crew with the fugitives — I can’t see them just re-creating every step afterwards — but how is Mantracker supposed to ignore their tracks? There’s something still amiss about that show, but I’ve only seen a couple.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 20, 2009 8:55 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I have had the same thought, only mine’s a sitcom about the cameramen and stage people behind a Bear Grylls-type character. He’s constantly doing insane shit, they’re trying to make sure he doesn’t die and whining about being cold.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on May 20, 2009 2:44 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well I’m out of luck on watching it … forgot I told my oldest he could watch deadliest warrior that is on at the same time.

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 19, 2009 10:13 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

off topic

thanx black hawks for totally choking….makes our loss feel even worse….the wings are gonna breeze….this is so disgusting

I wanna throw up on your new shoes

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on May 20, 2009 9:36 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

makes our loss feel even worse….

I dunno — there’s a bright side if all Detroit’s losses this postseason all come at the hand of the Ducks.

http://www.battleofcali.com/

by Earl Sleek on May 20, 2009 9:46 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

hehe good point…

I wanna throw up on your new shoes

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on May 20, 2009 9:53 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Do you really see them losing at this point tho? I’m beginning to doubt it myself.

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 20, 2009 10:50 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

yeah at least for some of the Sharks fans, they feel better seeing how tough the Wings had it against the Ducks

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 20, 2009 10:50 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wings are over-rated

seriously, they are just 6 injuries away from CHI pushing a G7.

by Mike in OC on May 20, 2009 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

6 is my lucky number … so who knows … maybe we’ll get all 6 in the next game … :)

Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?

by ang6666 on May 20, 2009 2:52 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

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