Ducks Gameday -- Mind if I borrow your marketing gimmick?
by Earl Sleek on Oct 13, 2010 10:35 AM PDT
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PrintVancouver Canucks (1-0-1) at Anaheim Ducks (0-3-0), 7 pm
Nucks Misconduct and Anaheim Calling -- there's two sides to every train wreck.
It's quite possible that the Ducks' road trip might go down as the worst three-game start to a season ever in league history, considering goal differential, shot differential, and penalty differential -- I leave that to true statheads to verify. Words can't really do it justice.
Time to go back to an old classic.
But a blogger must persevere, I suppose. I thought I'd use the opportunity to steal from the Sharks' brilliant marketing campaign from the past couple of seasons -- the TV ads that show Sharks players being awful at alternate professions, but then being good at hockey. You know -- Joe Thornton is a rotten ventriloquist, but he's an awesome playmaker; Patrick Marleau is a lousy medium, but he's a fantastic scorer -- that sort of thing.
You'll probably see the punchlines coming, but here are my versions adapted for the Anaheim Ducks. Sadly, I lazily didn't color my toons today -- I can only do so much when the Ducks fail to inspire.
Ryan Getzlaf is a rotten barber...
...and he's also a rotten superstar captain, too!
| GP |
G - A - Pts |
+/- |
PIM |
| 3 |
0 - 0 - 0 |
-5 |
6 |
Getzlaf in particular has been awful, though his linemates are taking most of the egregious penalties. At 5-on-5 so far, Getzlaf has been on the ice for 20 shots-for and 35 shots-against. That's the second-highest on-ice shot discrepancy among forwards (behind Matt Beleskey, who's had problems with any centerman thus far). He's telegraphing passes and getting caught flat-footed a lot. Plus there's the never-ending saga of Getzlaf yelling at referees -- go captain counterproductive!
More Ducks advertisements after the jump!
Corey Perry is a terrible dentist...
... and he's also a terrible scoring winger to boot!
| GP |
G - A - Pts |
+/- |
PIM |
| 3 |
0 - 0 - 0 |
-3 |
23 |
Perry has the best shooting numbers of all Ducks forwards -- at 5-on-5, he's been on the ice for 24 shots-for vs 27 shots-against, nearly even. His problem has been discipline, and Getzlaf is getting very little done without him (well, with him, too, but at least shots are remotely even). And his stupid penalty-taking is rubbing off on our next ad's focus, too.
* * *
Bobby Ryan is a lousy plumber...
...and he's been lousy since signing his new contract, too!
| GP |
G - A - Pts |
+/- |
PIM |
| 3 |
0 - 0 - 0 |
-4 |
23 |
Ryan's 5-on-5 shooting numbers are somewhere between Getzlaf's and Perry's -- he's been on the ice for 22 shots-for vs 29 shots-against. He's probably come closest to scoring an actual goal, but on the whole B-Ry hasn't done much to inspire, either. And for Ryan to match Perry in penalty minutes is downright silly.
* * *
Randy Carlyle is an awful auto mechanic...
...and he's a rotten head coach as well! See shooting table below.
* * *
I probably could go on all day -- feel free to add your own ideas in the comments. Anyways, this table shows Anaheim's shots-for vs shots-against by opponent, including all preseason and regular season results thus far. In ten games, Anaheim has been outshot by an unbelievable 175 shots.
Ducks Shooting Results by Opponent
| Opponent |
GP |
SF |
SA |
SD |
| San Jose Sharks |
2 |
40 |
84 |
-44 |
| St. Louis Blues |
1 |
14 |
53 |
-39 |
| Los Angeles Kings |
2 |
48 |
85 |
-37 |
| Detroit Red Wings |
1 |
21 |
43 |
-22 |
| Phoenix Coyotes |
1 |
21 |
40 |
-19 |
| Nashville Predators |
1 |
37 |
49 |
-12 |
| Vancouver Canucks |
2 |
54 |
56 |
-2 |
| Total |
10 |
235 |
410 |
-175 |
The bottom row is the Canucks -- even though Vancouver won both preseason contests, they're really the one outlier team that hasn't outrageously outshot the Ducks so far. Overall, the Ducks have surrendered 40+ shots in 8 of 10 contests thus far; only in the two games against Vancouver were the Ducks were able to hold an opponent to 31 or less.
Don't know what that means, exactly, but something to pay attention to tonight.
Prediction: Some fans will boo the team on their return, but I'll try to imagine they're yelling "Vayoo". I'll be around for game comments -- stop on by.
Go Ducks.
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So I guess the last table means that the Canucks suck too?
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Like reading thoughts confined to 140 characters? I'm on Twitter too.
it’ll get better. i hope
but if ducks season keeps going like this, i think selänne’s next blog post will need censorship. a lots of it…
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
If it is censored, feel free to insert your own cussing when you feel it’s appropriate in the translation.
www.battleofcali.com
Niedermayer is for sure, no fingers crossed, definitely retired right? No talking him out of it? I’m only half joking.
Oh, and I should point out — when I’m talking about Getzlaf / Perry / Ryan’s 5-on-5 shooting results, that’s just for the 3 regular season games. The last table is the only one that include preseason results.
Basic reason: going through Game Logs is tough work! I could only do three of them.
www.battleofcali.com
Ahem.
The Zapruder Film of the Kennedy assassination is a better hockey movie than The Love Guru.
Battle of California
by Megalodon on Oct 13, 2010 10:55 AM PDT reply actions 10 recs
This has to be rec’d.
In Lou We Trust: Freshly signed to the last 15 year deal in the history of SBNation
If the quality of my posts begin to get better, it's because i'm doing steroids.
by Kevin Sellathamby on Oct 13, 2010 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions
yea had court this morning…only for the judge to tell yea everythings cool..stay outta troble…u couldnt tell me that over the phone jackass….10 pto hours down the drain
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 5:02 PM PDT up reply actions
What did you do?
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
lets just say im a paul ruebin fan
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 6:44 PM PDT up reply actions
that begs for details and pics … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
I should have put in a “BANG! BANG!” or colored it — he’s just shooting the hood of a car with a pistol.
www.battleofcali.com
He’s putting speedholes in the car?
In Lou We Trust: Freshly signed to the last 15 year deal in the history of SBNation
If the quality of my posts begin to get better, it's because i'm doing steroids.
by Kevin Sellathamby on Oct 13, 2010 11:02 AM PDT up reply actions 3 recs
Heh. I had it pictured much better in my mind, I guess.
The unseen part is that some guy came in because his engine was making an odd “putt putt” sound, thus Carlyle’s attempted solution. :)
www.battleofcali.com
I get it. But i just wanted to use the speedholes reference from the Simpsons.
In Lou We Trust: Freshly signed to the last 15 year deal in the history of SBNation
If the quality of my posts begin to get better, it's because i'm doing steroids.
by Kevin Sellathamby on Oct 13, 2010 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions
Oh, don’t worry. I rec’d it. :)
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 13, 2010 11:20 AM PDT via mobile up reply actions
does it matter?
RC hasn’t been able to get any of his “tools” to work so far. Maybe he should just throw a Rocket Propelled Grenade at it, course it would have to be a dud on impact to accurately describe this young season.
Koivu almost deserves something positive. I think he’s the only guy trying.
"Douglas Murray is a humongous human being." – Drew Remenda
Gents, I could really use an online feed tonight. My dad, season ticket holder and huge fan, was excited to be back at the Pond, but last Sunday broke his hip tumbling over a guy after stopping an empty net breakaway. His hospital room only gets broadcast channels, so my bro and I are setting up his laptop with a feed so he can see it. Help please?
UNRELATED: Handel is the most overrated composer ever...
by Bleys on Oct 13, 2010 11:06 AM PDT via mobile reply actions
Just like in the case of the Russian advice earlier this week, I’m useless, but somebody can help you out, I’m sure.
www.battleofcali.com
Thanks everyone! I’m sure one will work. I’m just glad the place has free wifi, or else there’d be no way of working it out so he can watch.
UNRELATED: Handel is the most overrated composer ever...
by Bleys on Oct 13, 2010 11:56 AM PDT via mobile up reply actions
Usually www.footyfree.com has a feed. Just go to the live stream section and click on the Ice Hockey tab. It’s not guarantee, but so far, I’ve been able to find every NHL game there.
I'm against sigs......Fuck.
http://www.myp2pforum.eu/threads/46641-NHL-Today!-October-13th-2010
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
It’s on TSN, so something will be up on Justin.tv. You can check atdhe or any place else that catalogues the streams.
by Arthur from Anaheim Calling on Oct 13, 2010 11:17 AM PDT up reply actions
…and he’s also a rotten superstar captain, too!
I don’t know why, but the pleonastic punchlines made it funnier for me.
by Arthur from Anaheim Calling on Oct 13, 2010 11:15 AM PDT reply actions
Yeah, looking at it now maybe I should have reversed all the jokes, as the punchlines are sort of in the setup here.
But whatever — Brian Hayward is an awful play-by-play guy, and he’s also an awful analyst, too! :)
www.battleofcali.com
no, it’s awesome. It somehow makes it sound more excited.
by Arthur from Anaheim Calling on Oct 13, 2010 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions
Rather then looking at tonight as another possibility of failing, I’ve decided to look at it as an opportunity to turn things around. The Ducks are going to win tonight and everything is going to be ok.
Good post Earl. Lately looking at game stats has made me cringe, lets hope tonight will be different. Go Ducks.
I'm against sigs......Fuck.
I suppose it’s possible that things could get worse, but the shock value of utter failure is losing its edge — wouldn’t be anything new.
But the gambling man says things generally even out, so results have to improve — I like your approach.
www.battleofcali.com
When the only way to go is up…..They can’t really fuck that up right?
I rec’d that shit.
by Steven Hida on Oct 13, 2010 11:31 AM PDT up reply actions
Well, we still have to go through the “blow a lead” phase that will be frustrating, but I’ll probably be overly encouraged by that short “have a lead” phase.
www.battleofcali.com
In the three regular season games, the Ducks have been oushot 37 -14 when the score is tied, and outscored 4-0. Ducks have taken 3 shots within 30 feet of the backboards in tie-game situations; opponents have taken 14 (including all four goals).
That’s some of the analysis that didn’t quite make the cut today, but I’ve been delving.
www.battleofcali.com
Maybe they need to put Selanne with Getzlaf and Koivu with Ryan and Perry. Give Getzlaf some easier minutes and a sniper to pass to and let Koivu provide a calming influence to the other two idiots.
Ryan-Koivu-Perry
Blake-Getzlaf-Selanne
It’s not going to solve the horror show that is that third line but you have to start somewhere.
It’s not going to solve the horror show that is that third line but you have to start somewhere.
Chipchura, I think, should anchor the third line. Marchant can go to a wing or drop to center Parros. And maybe we could insert Ryan Carter — he’s a backchecker.
www.battleofcali.com
( )-Chip-Carter could work. They don’t even need to score, just not get tooled every night like they have been. There’s still the problem of that left spot, since Beleskey has been the worst player in the NHL. Sexton? Lupul, if he’s still alive?
I don’t really see Marchant cutting it. He reminds me a lot of Derek Armstrong: good guy, works hard, but simply doesn’t have it anymore.
Beleskey could be fine on the top line if the two babies could get their act together — I’m not sure he’s been the problem so much as he’s been dragged down by Marchant and Getzlaf at their down moments.
www.battleofcali.com
I suppose it’s possible that things could get worse, but the shock value of utter failure is losing its edge — wouldn’t be anything new.
But the gambling man says things generally even out, so results have to improve — I like your approach.
All things considered, things will get better. Lydman and Sutton getting injured really isn’t doing us any favors right now. It’s kind of shit luck to have two of our main defensemen injured.
Looking at the positives. Ryan aside from when he’s been playing like a fucking idiot has looked alright. He’s had a couple of good chances here and there. One thing I would like to see less of is each player trying to be too cute. Get in the zone, throw it at the net, and grind out an ugly goal. Personally, that’s what I would like to see more of. Get back to the basics.
I'm against sigs......Fuck.
ok, I have been very careful in my game attire selection. Unfortunately I cannot do anything about the new shoes that aren’t game tested yet. I am not wearing any dead animal stuff since that can’t be lucky since it wasn’t lucky for the original owner (obviously).
Let's go Ducks.
Shit yes just wear a killer whale carcass.
That’ll send a message..
I rec’d that shit.
by Steven Hida on Oct 13, 2010 11:47 AM PDT up reply actions
Maybe this will work: If it does, Earl it will have to be used for all the games. If it doesn’t we burn it in effigy at midnight.
Let's go Ducks.
by deb d on Oct 13, 2010 11:49 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Haha, I can’t help but offer this pictorial rebuttal I once stole for an old BoC post (probably twice stolen):
Even though it perfectly captures a shitty season so far, that makes me laugh every time. Koivu is the one that made it across.
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 13, 2010 12:08 PM PDT up reply actions 5 recs
Um…um…and then the baby ducks swam to safety, and met up with their mom again later, right? (wibble)
In Dinglebarn We Trust
Well, this set could have been better — originally it was going to be an eight-part series in color (I was going to draw each person being awful at hockey, too), but they I got lazy, and cut it in half, and didn’t color….
Gimme a win, boys.
www.battleofcali.com
kinda sounds like the Ducks attitude huh? the intent to put effort was there, but upon further thought they said “screw it” … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Hey now. These cartoons are enjoyable. The Ducks’ performances were nothing of the kind!
In Dinglebarn We Trust
good point … nevermind Earl … :)
wait … Niesy … whose team do you cheer on again?
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Team Cartoon!
(Actually I hate seeing people I like be so glum. I’m pretty sure that’s not allowed)
In Dinglebarn We Trust
This post made my day
Tough work day, plus a trip to the DMV. But it’s all worth it after this post.
Managing editor of From The Rink
www.fromtherink.com
unlike my day – last day !!!!! and now I have two days of being unemployed and going to the Sharks game on Saturday … going to be a great few days before starting my new job on Monday … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Come on, you've hit rock bottom, that's good news
Means it can’t get any worse… Right? Right?
/crickets
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
“lead role” – Mr. Fowler, he of three games played, is not only our “bright spot”, but “making the most of [his] lead role” as well. No pressure on ya there big guy!
great cartoons earl…they do numb the sting…not sure what to think other than a win today against a good team would do wonders for my soul
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 4:35 PM PDT reply actions
they bad this tear? im so consumed by our shittyness
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 5:04 PM PDT up reply actions
hey cheap well vodka and sunny d isnt too bad…
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 6:52 PM PDT reply actions
just saw frankie score a goal…sniffle sniffle…love to have him back
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 6:55 PM PDT reply actions
This Montreal Tampa game has been going nuts.
Bolts tied it up in the 3rd, 31 seconds later the Habs pulled ahead again.
www.battleofcali.com
hockey rules….now lets hope the ducks try to join the fun
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 6:58 PM PDT up reply actions
is it ok to root for toronto? they got jiggy?…frankie? burkie?
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 6:59 PM PDT reply actions
what really?…now im really rooting for them now
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:00 PM PDT up reply actions
yes all those fans….dont fuckin suck assholes
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:01 PM PDT reply actions
sold out even
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
yea if there not motivated to be competent even today..i dont know what
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Sex Offender and Princess Luca back in the lineup — Uncle Festerling and Voros are out.
5 D SBISA, LUCA
8 R SELANNE, TEEMU
9 R RYAN, BOBBY
10 R PERRY, COREY
11 C KOIVU, SAKU
15 C GETZLAF, RYAN
16 R PARROS, GEORGE
17 D VISNOVSKY, LUBOMIR
21 D BROOKBANK, SHELDON
22 C MARCHANT, TODD
23 D MARA, PAUL
28 C CHIPCHURA, KYLE
33 L BLAKE, JASON
39 L BELESKEY, MATT
42 R SEXTON, DAN
50 R BODIE, TROY
54 D FOWLER, CAM
60 D MIKKELSON, BRENDAN
1 G HILLER, JONAS
31 G MCELHINNEY, CURTIS
www.battleofcali.com
gorilla head shares your assement of uncle fester
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:03 PM PDT up reply actions
i like that…carey was always solid…an odie clone
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:04 PM PDT up reply actions
cant get over pete peeters stupid name
a couple boos for gorilla head
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:04 PM PDT reply actions
these are your 2010-2011 0 and 3 anaheim ducks!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:08 PM PDT reply actions
funny i was thinking the same thing..especailly when getz came out
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:14 PM PDT up reply actions
this cheap vodka is kicking in…im actually excited tonite
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:11 PM PDT reply actions
Crazy TB-MTL game is tied again
Stamkos with the goal
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
hiller does look cool with his mask in the black uni’s
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:15 PM PDT reply actions
fuck u vigweault..however u spell it
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:17 PM PDT reply actions
get him off the fuckin point nooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwww!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:18 PM PDT up reply actions
5 on 3 and no score?
But wait, there’s more.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
getzlaf heard me..i truley belive it
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:19 PM PDT reply actions
Perry on top of a goalie … (shocked here) … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
hahaha…your not playing me…so DOUCHE TRICK!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:27 PM PDT up reply actions
hey guys u score more goals being in the “other” end
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:26 PM PDT reply actions
It's like the Canucks
Are on the Perpetual Power Play.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
/dusts off
American Heroes: Joe Pavelski, Buster Posey, David Backes
Fear the Fin - Cornering the market on third pairing defensemen since March 2009
by mymclife on Oct 13, 2010 7:30 PM PDT up reply actions 5 recs
thats awesome..i would rec 100 times if i could
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:31 PM PDT up reply actions
Amazing work.
The Zapruder Film of the Kennedy assassination is a better hockey movie than The Love Guru.
Battle of California
I don’t get it? What’s going on in the video?
by ScottyKnows on Oct 14, 2010 10:30 AM PDT up reply actions
Earl is clapping after the Ducks got their first shot in the period something like 18 minutes into the period.
American Heroes: Joe Pavelski, Buster Posey, David Backes
Fear the Fin - Cornering the market on third pairing defensemen since March 2009
At least
Hiller is getting to face a lot of shots. It builds character.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Something about the Prime Ticket pimping Giants Phillies NLCS
Would just annoy people in So Cal I believe.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Hey, I’m in SoCal and I’m fine with it.
American Heroes: Joe Pavelski, Buster Posey, David Backes
Fear the Fin - Cornering the market on third pairing defensemen since March 2009
I’m okay with watching the Giants get swept
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 7:33 PM PDT up reply actions
Go American League!
For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.
fuck those dh using pussies..the pitcher is an athlete make him hit
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 8:06 AM PDT up reply actions
Also: goalies should be used as shooters in the final round of a shootout, right?
Actually, that does sound awesome.
www.battleofcali.com
i think hiller would have some moves
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 8:17 AM PDT up reply actions
on that subject when does tabasco sauce get his first start?..first back to back?…i predict friday for some odd reason
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 8:18 AM PDT up reply actions
Seems like Torres means badass on the team in Spanish.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
how bout any forward on the blue line
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:38 PM PDT up reply actions
exactly….just fuckin do it gorilla head…he wont get caught flat-footed like getz and ryan
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:42 PM PDT up reply actions
sex monster back in….that asshole tries like a mo fo at least
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:41 PM PDT reply actions
sexton also took goalie crashing 101 from perry lol
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:46 PM PDT reply actions
Luongo’s angry about being sexually harassed.
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 13, 2010 7:48 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
we all want a say in who sexually harasses us … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
cap;n doing his trademark pass back
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 7:49 PM PDT reply actions
Hip hop at a hockey game? How adventurous for the OC.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
The Ducks settled down, not too shabby.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Nickleback is still around to torment the world?
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
I like having NHL Center Ice for free this week
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
When Bieksa misses games, that's actually a good thing for the Nucks
Because he sucks and all…
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
What's the deal with Hiller's mask?
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
That was a swinging dunk waiting to happen.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Wow, boos
Just imagine if the Canucks actually scored
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
Two terrible consecutive shifts, and I definitely heard boos.
Anytime you’re ready to play, Ducks — fans are waiting.
www.battleofcali.com
Oh
Was that off the cross bar?
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
Come on Ducks
Get a goal, for America!
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
as usual the rat working his white ass off
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 8:30 PM PDT reply actions
maybe the only way the ducks can score 5 on 3..lets goooo!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 8:31 PM PDT reply actions
i wish i could someday see that score at olympics or worlds…
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
so not fair… there’s only two Finns. their goals should be doubled to make it fair!
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
Toni Lydman is counting every goal as double. :)
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 14, 2010 8:43 AM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
hmmm…
step 1) toni lydman to hockey ref
step 2) toni lydman to be ref at the next worlds in finland’s games
step 3) gold!!!
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
ok so that plan all year..5 on 3’s….ehhh no problem
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 8:33 PM PDT reply actions
Who knew?
Teemu Selanne is still playing. He’s like Brett Favre, without sexting his hockey stick.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
There still a sex joke in there
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 8:34 PM PDT up reply actions
What are you talking about?
Teemu is always sexting Paul Kariya.
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
Hellooooo, everybody!
Been watching this game & Laker’s preseason. It’s quite surprising that the Ducks are tied with ’Nucks. Very interesting…
Veryinterestingconfusing…
Fixed
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 8:41 PM PDT up reply actions
What’s the score in the Lakers game?
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
Halftime, 47-46 Sacramento Kings over the Lakers...
So far Kobe only played 9 minutes, but is starting the 3rd period right now.
58-52 Lakers 4:43 3rd
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
by Hit4TheCycle on Oct 13, 2010 8:44 PM PDT up reply actions
They have 7 penalties
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 8:53 PM PDT up reply actions
And LO shoots a 3 pointer at the end of 3rd quarter.
I don’t mean to post a pre-season Laker game here but the Laker’s defense looks REALLY GOOD:)
I smell a threepeat!
Apparently you can get technicals for throwing punches at the air.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
The refs said they would be handing out more T’s now.
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
Spice up the game
Instead of ejections for 2 technicals, after one technical, player sits out for 2 minutes, team plays shorthanded, but goaltending is legal.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
by Hit4TheCycle on Oct 13, 2010 9:03 PM PDT up reply actions
El Jimador
If it’s the #1 selling tequilla in Mexico, it’s got to be good.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
i would have had one with a score there
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:05 PM PDT up reply actions
Ryan shitting all over the place… BS call though
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
I miss Erhoff
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
I saw Malhotra is also there
It’s like Sharks of the Pacific Northwest.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
by Hit4TheCycle on Oct 13, 2010 9:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Eh, fuck the team that made this 4th game of the season suddenly so goddamn critical.
www.battleofcali.com
Looked good? Maybe — this is a team that has scored one even-strength goal in nearly four games. I wasn’t holding my breath.
www.battleofcali.com
Televising Clippers Preseason
For Shame.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Almost as bad as televising the Clippers regular season.
The Zapruder Film of the Kennedy assassination is a better hockey movie than The Love Guru.
Battle of California
NHL Gamecenter keeps reporting that players are hitting “P. Schaefer” and I all I can think is “Why is David Letterman’s band leader playing hockey?”
The Zapruder Film of the Kennedy assassination is a better hockey movie than The Love Guru.
Battle of California
So what did you think of Silver's penalty? Let me guess..AAAAAAAA!!!!!
Nucks Misconduct
"Here goes nothin'" - Han Solo
Perry with the equivalent
Of an Alley OOP.
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o shit..i saw him in the vicinity…pre-mature ejaculation
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:21 PM PDT up reply actions
but true?
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
perhaps demonstrations are needed
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:30 PM PDT up reply actions
you are always so willing … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Haha Luongo
"Too much awesome on my feet."-Brian Wilson
"Time for the laser show, boys!"- Aubrey Huff
LOLngo
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 9:17 PM PDT up reply actions
holy shit! who taught the Ducks how to play?
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Alright, I'm calling DirectTV
My TV’s all messed up… Says the Ducks lead 4-3
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
hahahahahaha..the laugh of the damned
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:21 PM PDT up reply actions
WTF!!!
I change to the Lakers when the ’Nucks scored. I just turned back to this game when they replayed the last Duck goal. Un-FUCKING-believable!!!
Yeah, that goal came after a even-I-can’t-believe-the-Canucks-didn’t-put-it-in play.
www.battleofcali.com
Specially against Luongo
At times he gets lazy at handling pucks. Which is why he gives up soo many easy goals.
Somehow I don't think that's the first time the term has been used...
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Fowler looks really poised on the puck
Nice pick Ducks… And LOL Sather
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
ive yearned to hear those 3 words
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:27 PM PDT up reply actions
whats with the new profile pic?…
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Boy, if the Ducks can pull this off, I wonder where they’ll hold the postgame parade? :)
www.battleofcali.com
so Ducks fans … are you on the edge of your seat? :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
are you on the edge of yourseatcliff? :)
/Fixed
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
by angelofdeath on Oct 13, 2010 9:34 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Ducks trying hard
Not to pull their best 2010 49ers impression.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
ha…there fault for belieing in alex smith…guys sux balls
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 13, 2010 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions
now I’ve been saying the Ducks slump is a fluke … so is that correct, or is this win a fluke … guess we’ll find out as the season continues … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
A stick giveaway
Where grown men don’t fight for it.
Time to celebrate.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
Crazy game tonight...
Chat with all of you next game the Ducks or Sharks play the Kings. SEEE YAAAAH!!!
Nucks Misconduct must be going crazy tonight…
"I still love my ex-wife, but only when we're not talking"
It might be so crazy
It’s just Nucks Conduct.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
by Hit4TheCycle on Oct 13, 2010 9:45 PM PDT up reply actions
And ha! The Canucks for the third time fail to reach 40 shots against the Ducks — only team this season/preseason to do so.
39, bitches!
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 13, 2010 9:48 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
In the end
The Chileans had a better save percentage than Luongo.
The FairWeather Channel - Sports Comics and Bandwagon Forecast
by Hit4TheCycle on Oct 13, 2010 9:54 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I’m not even gonna botther to try to explain what I saw tonight… just check my Twitter if you care.
To sum it all up: I took a lot of crap tonight for wearing my Doughty jersey, and what the fuck is that sheep thing that flies around in intermission?
Denis Gauthier sucks at hockey... and life.
I was sitting in the second to last row up in 412… sadly, he didn’t come close to me =(
Denis Gauthier sucks at hockey... and life.
And the PA announcer said “Serta”, which I know it was last year, but there was something different written on the side… “Bassell”, if I’m reading the fuzzy picture I took well enough, which doesn’t even seem to exist.
Denis Gauthier sucks at hockey... and life.
Bassett is the sheep’s name. He’s an employee of Serta.
Warning: probably not true.
www.battleofcali.com
That is one badass sheep…
They named the sheep blimp? the fuck…
Denis Gauthier sucks at hockey... and life.
nah, the sheep has a name.
We talked about this last year, I just dont remember anymore. I thinks it’s like Dottie or something, or wait, it’s “goaldie the serta sheep”.
I thinks thats the reason we didnt make it to the playoffs last year. I feel like a sheep skin coat and some “sheep-chops (like lamb-chops).”
"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.
Is it "Gertie" or "Gertrude" or something? Why does that sound familiar?
You need to stop blacking out and ending up at the senior center.
"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.
by tu madre on Oct 14, 2010 11:28 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Well after 3 games you all deserve a reason to cheer. What a colossal f*ckup by Vancouver.
Nucks Misconduct
"Here goes nothin'" - Han Solo
Don’t worry, pal — last year we were the first team to lose to Toronto, and uh, that, uh, didn’t work out so well.
www.battleofcali.com
well now that you got your big 3 forwards going you should see continued improvement. Your D is off though. You need a better band of brothers back there. Poor Hiller.
Nucks Misconduct
"Here goes nothin'" - Han Solo
by Sean Zandberg on Oct 13, 2010 11:29 PM PDT up reply actions
Patience! Someday the Lydman-Lilja pairing will make its debut. And Sutton Death will re-emerge from the ashes.
www.battleofcali.com
oh and Visnovsky will actually start putting up points
Nucks Misconduct
"Here goes nothin'" - Han Solo
by Sean Zandberg on Oct 13, 2010 11:37 PM PDT up reply actions
More good news for Ducks after winning home opener: Toni Lydman is cleared to play after his double vision finally disappeared.
Hooray for singular vision!
www.battleofcali.com
u think toni will miss seeing 4 boobs on his wife?
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
need a new thread..too long to scroll down!!!
i suggest who does toni pair with and how what happens to the other pairings or somthing?…
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 11:04 AM PDT up reply actions
Lydman – Lilja, maybe, who knows? Not really sure if “cleared” means “playing immediately” — we’ll see.
www.battleofcali.com
And wait — you’re scrolling down and not using the “jump to next unread comment” feature?
www.battleofcali.com
where the fuck is that?…oh shit
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions
It will change your life. Not available on mobile commenting, though — there is a downside sometimes to too many comments.
And besides, I’m still lazy — no new post until tomorrow.
www.battleofcali.com
Goddamnit, I could’ve saved a lot of time if I knew about this earlier
For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.
I blame this on earl…son of a bitch..yea its pretty kick ass now that i know
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 12:32 PM PDT up reply actions
seriously, why is it written in such fine print?another cruel joke.
by ScottyKnows on Oct 14, 2010 12:39 PM PDT up reply actions
fuck i know….someone in even smaller lettering is the magic key combination to the edit button..that only a korean-irishmen is able to read
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions
i think vish needs some help…
i just looked it up..mikkelsson is only a -1?…
brookbank is the bad bad duckie…maybe put lydman there
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions
Yeah, Lubo – Mikkelson wasn’t a bad pairing last night, maybe that sticks. I like Fowler with Mara okay, so probably Lydman and Sbisa/Brookbank?
Still really tough to say without seeing him play, though.
www.battleofcali.com
and when sutton comes back who leave? Mikkelson or Sbisa?
by ScottyKnows on Oct 14, 2010 11:36 AM PDT up reply actions
for a freakin broken finger? damn it! man up sutton!
Yah, sbisa didn’t look too impressive at all.
by ScottyKnows on Oct 14, 2010 12:16 PM PDT up reply actions
problem with sbis is fowler make him look bad..sbisa looks conservative and tentative…where as fowler looks like hes been in the league for 10 years…
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 12:25 PM PDT up reply actions
I don’t know dude. He just looks plain bad sometimes.
by ScottyKnows on Oct 14, 2010 12:40 PM PDT up reply actions
I THINK gorilla head agrees with you..it seems like he only plays him cuz he has to
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 14, 2010 12:45 PM PDT up reply actions
Except for that one hipcheck that I think was delivered by Sbisa — it was a very Doughty moment.
www.battleofcali.com
yes!
that was his best work of the night.
Good thing all the Ducks need are two 5-on-3’s and a blown too many men call to win a game! I’m sure that will happen all the time.
by RudyKelly on Oct 14, 2010 2:17 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
If there’s one thing the Kings know how to do, it’s score on the power play on the Canucks in the post season.
"Douglas Murray is a humongous human being." – Drew Remenda
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