A message from BoC Legal
by Megalodon on Nov 23, 2010 7:16 AM PST
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Per the e-mail requests of the real Judson Couture and Chet Couture, Logan and Judson Couture's father, and the advice of the Battle of California legal department, certain sections of the post entitled "Wiki-Sharks vol. 2: Young Guns" have been altered. We have been informed by Chet that it was not Judson who made the Wikipedia changes to his brother's article, it was "one of his high school phys-ed teachers who was also responsible for honoring Logan by having him enshrined into his high school hall of fame. The information was provided to him by me (Logan's father)." We at Battle of California thank Judson and Chet for their assistance. This article was only intended as satire, and none of what was written in any of the Wiki-Sharks series (or pretty much anything else we write) should be taken as presentations of facts.
Thank you.
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Please note the topic-tags I used. You should probably familiarize yourself with them.
California Über Alles
Battle of California
Maybe we could save this as a regular post template, though I’m pretty much making up that concept right now.
www.battleofcali.com
holy cow .. so first Earl gets in trouble, then Meg … so when is it Rudy’s turn? :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Still, seems like NAMDLA might eventually have an issue with him.
Lighthouse Hockey: No Streit, no Okposo, no MacDonald. Not that we particularly care.
by Dominik on Nov 23, 2010 10:36 AM PST up reply actions 3 recs
holy cow .. so first Earl gets in trouble, then Meg … so when is it Rudy’s turn? :)
I’m far too lovable.
dogs love everyone…i think they were referring to humans
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 12:23 PM PST up reply actions
and none of what was written in any of the Wiki-Sharks series (or pretty much anything else we write) should be taken as presentations of facts.
another boc slogan
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 7:29 AM PST reply actions
Haha, I just got a reply e-mail from Chet, who wrote me about the post last night. I won’t quote it all, but my favorite line of his e-mail:
Thanks too for the kind words about Logan. We hope that his success will continue & that the Sharks soon get their shit together as a team.
Get your shit together, Sharks! Chet demands it! :)
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Nov 23, 2010 7:47 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
yes chet demands it….!!!
he also demands a VCR that will work…..for openers….but for gawds sake would you cover yourself?
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 7:58 AM PST up reply actions
ha ha … Sharks’ fans have been demanding it as well … that isn’t working out so well … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
I wrote him a nice reply (feels like we’re buds now), and I don’t know if he’s open to it, but I included this open invitation:
And if you’d ever like to set the record straight on Judson or Logan’s hockey career or even offer your own take on the Sharks, you can always write us a guest entry — we definitely have readership that would have interest. :)
BoC’s possible first scoop! :)
www.battleofcali.com
This is hilarious. I needed a good laugh after last night’s shit-storm in Ottawa. Kudos to the Coutures for being cool about the whole matter now. Hopefully Chet will continue to come around the BoC.
Taylor Morgan: "My abortion was botched!"
Teemu Selanne: "Wow. That sounds awesome."
by DodgerBlueBalls on Nov 23, 2010 8:36 AM PST reply actions
A few other clarifications:
-Joe Thornton is not gay
-Anze Kopitar does not rifle through trash cans for scraps; he is actually a dedicated recycler and is looking for cans, bottles, etc.
-Corey Perry did not legally change his last name from “Peepants” before joining the NHL
-Dustin Brown does not leave the saftey of a turtle shell to play hockey
-It is not true that Ryan Getzlaf loses a hair every time he acts like a douche bag
-Kyle Clifford did not once kill a man just to see what it felt like; he killed him over a gambling debt
-Douglas Murray is not the inspiration for the Marvel character Colossus
-Samsung does not actually make quality televisions
-The Kings do not actually have sovereign claim to any territory; it’s just a name
-Cats are actually cooler than dogs
-Ryan Smyth does not have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome; or at least, I’m not a doctor so I couldn’t make that diagnosis
-Justin Williams has never uttered the phrase, “No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!”
-Patrick Marleau did not once go up to a girl scout troop outside his local supermarket and ask to buy some Lemonade cookies and then, once he discovered that they were all out, purchase Thin Mints (even though he hates mint) because he didn’t want to be rude
-Michal Handzus can not be distracted by throwing seed on the ground
-Tyler Myers’ neck does not grow an inch every time he tells a lie
-Erik Cole does not have Syphillis
-Earl Sleek probably does actually have a penis
-I am not gorgeous (wait, that’s a lie!)
-Megalodon is not a giant shark that lives in the ocean deep; he is, in fact, a porpoise
-Judson Couture did not write his brother’s Wikipedia page; he only complained to his dad when he discovered someone said he did
Thank you.
by RudyKelly on Nov 23, 2010 8:54 AM PST reply actions 9 recs
-Samsung does not actually make quality televisions
You fool! Are you trying to get us all killed?
Judson Couture is a wonderful human being.
Battle of California
Or no! they’re going to send the lawyer/assassin droids™ after you again!
Mike Weber: Rejailed into the pressbox.
Everything wrong with the Sabres is Drew Stafford's fault.
droids™
Someone sure is really scared of the lawyers… had to be sure to use the trademark symbol there. Are you worried about some crazy Star Wars geeks coming after you with their lightsabers?
-Anaheim Ducks goalie Jonas Hiller and World War 2 villain Adolph Hitler are in fact, two separate people.
www.battleofcali.com
Which one is worse? That’s for you to decide.
Chet Couture is a wonderful human being.
Battle of California
i dont think hitler would smile so evil like this (i tried to find a pic from the hiller freezer commerical but couldnt)
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 9:10 AM PST up reply actions
He reminds of Tim Curry in the Rocky Horror Picture show in that pic.
by Wooster11 on Nov 23, 2010 9:11 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Good call
Taylor Morgan: "My abortion was botched!"
Teemu Selanne: "Wow. That sounds awesome."
by DodgerBlueBalls on Nov 23, 2010 9:58 AM PST up reply actions
-The state of CA is not actually capable of raping other states.
by Wooster11 on Nov 23, 2010 9:11 AM PST up reply actions 4 recs
Earl Sleek probably does actually have a penis
apparently i wasnt the only one voyeured that nite…
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 9:07 AM PST up reply actions
-Megalodon is not a giant shark that lives in the ocean deep; he is, in fact, a porpoise
Don’t you remember? According to that guy on Jewels from the Crown Megalodon is “something from a board game.”
Chet Couture is a wonderful human being.
Battle of California
by Megalodon on Nov 23, 2010 9:08 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
i thought it was a mid-west belly buster 6 patty hamburger
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 9:11 AM PST up reply actions
My favorite
“Fuck you guys, you don’t know me and I certainly know more than enough about you!!!”
Taylor Morgan: "My abortion was botched!"
Teemu Selanne: "Wow. That sounds awesome."
by DodgerBlueBalls on Nov 23, 2010 10:03 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Cats are actually cooler than dogs
i bet this one took the longest to type
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 9:12 AM PST up reply actions
they are though
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
Remember kids it's down the road not across the street
As a cat lady myself, I absolutely agree haha
by AppleSweetRose on Nov 23, 2010 12:12 PM PST up reply actions
Damn, Wiki-Sharks is full of erroneous information! In this post I claim Drew Remenda and Alyn McCauley edited Marleau’s Wikipedia, and that the American Sign Language Association is affiliated with the Church of Satan.
I suck at research.
Chet Couture is a wonderful human being.
Battle of California
by Megalodon on Nov 23, 2010 9:19 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
you guys seem to run into some kind of trouble every other week
I really should hang out here more…
(Tweets @ChiBlackhawks, blogs at Blackhawks Down Low, and now also contributes to Intent to Blow.)
by chiblackhawks on Nov 23, 2010 12:14 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
We’re the bad boys of blogging. We’re just like that “Ace of Cakes” guy.
Chet Couture is a wonderful human being.
Battle of California
I love him! Too bad Food Network canceled their show. At least they’re willing to cast him in another one.
by AppleSweetRose on Nov 23, 2010 12:17 PM PST up reply actions
sweet he got another show i can still pretend im him
although i got to wear hats not cuz i grew out my hair
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 12:21 PM PST up reply actions
Who's Cake Boss?
(Tweets @ChiBlackhawks, blogs at Blackhawks Down Low, and now also contributes to Intent to Blow.)
by chiblackhawks on Nov 23, 2010 12:25 PM PST up reply actions
We’re just like that "Ace of Cakes" guy.
Rebels without good facial hair, or a cause.
In Dinglebarn We Trust
by Niesy on Nov 23, 2010 12:40 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
This is too awesome.
You guys are magnets for trouble. This makes you one of the more attractive, sexy, bad guys on SBN :)
by AppleSweetRose on Nov 23, 2010 12:16 PM PST reply actions
Plus the ever-looming threat of post corrections adds a bit of thrilling urgency to read things before they disappear.
www.battleofcali.com
It’s another reason to check BoC daily, haha.
by AppleSweetRose on Nov 23, 2010 2:41 PM PST up reply actions
Really? I had to come over here from my RSS feeder just to make sure this wasn’t some sort of strange joke.
How did the Coutures end up finding Wiki-Sharks? If you recall, during the BoC fantasy draft, I revealed that all the guys in the Sharks locker room (except Marleau) read BoC. Really though, I wonder if some players (especially younger ones) are actually big readers of some of the blogs out there.
You know, if I’d had to put a bet on who would’ve gotten BoC into some sort of legal trouble first, it would’ve been RudyKelly by a mile and a half. I mean, that would’ve been an easy call. What happened?
http://sacrificethebody.blogspot.com/
Sacrifice the Body - Examining the NHL through statistical analysis, reasoned thought, and blind conjecture.
by IAmJoe on Nov 23, 2010 1:29 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
How did the Coutures end up finding Wiki-Sharks?
I assume they were pointed to it by the high school phys ed teacher who updates their Wikipedia pages. :)
You know, if I’d had to put a bet on who would’ve gotten BoC into some sort of legal trouble first, it would’ve been RudyKelly by a mile and a half.
His turn will probably be the loudest.
www.battleofcali.com
wait … the Sharks players read BoC? how do you know this?? ugh! (reading my past comments to make sure I was always nice to my guys)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
I wouldn’t worry about it, Ang. Among the “sky is falling” Sharks fans, you’d be the least of their troubled fanbase :)
Plus, it’s BoC. It’s either take it or leave it with these guys :p
by AppleSweetRose on Nov 23, 2010 2:40 PM PST up reply actions
First Earl, then Meg…
I can’t wait until the grammar police decide to arrest Spade for refusing to spellcheck or capitalize “Rudy”
In Lou We Trust/Twitter
This season is all a terrible dream brought on by too much Penne a la Pesto.
by Kevin Sellathamby on Nov 23, 2010 2:06 PM PST reply actions
Ahhh… but you forget… it’s because of Spade’s style and mastery of the written word that things like this happen
http://www.battleofcali.com/2010/8/18/1630504/nhl-11-for-spade-we-need-your
http://www.battleofcali.com/2010/9/8/1677566/my-new-bffs-and-nhl-11
i should shut up about where im gonna be certian days then
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Nov 23, 2010 2:17 PM PST up reply actions
I used to kinda like Pheonix. Not now, they get too many points. Go Edmonton.
"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.
yeah … heard they are about to take the Kings place … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
Rudy
You better get arrested or something to top Earl and Meg…
"Before I make a mistake, I don't make that mistake" -Johan Cruijff
I like it — and then when they open the trunk of Rudy’s car they can find a tied-up Bailey.
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Nov 23, 2010 11:35 PM PST up reply actions 2 recs
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