Patrick Marleau Facts
Thanks to Meg and Nut for helping me compile these. These are... Patrick Marleau Facts!
-The first time Patrick Marleau met Owen Nolan, Nolan called him "Pete." Marleau was too embarrassed to correct him, and so it continued for six years. Marleau eventually orchestrated Nolan's trade to Toronto just to end the humiliation.
-Patrick Marleau's idea of comedy is doing a "Borat" impression around Evgeni Nabokov. Marleau's never seen Borat.
-Patrick Marleau's favorite part about going skiing is the chair lift.
- After the coach pressured him to show more leadership, Marleau began insisting that fellow players refer to him as "Cap'n." He was subsequently stripped of the captaincy.
-Patrick Marleau sings in his church's choir.
-Patrick Marleau tried to bond with teammate Mike Grier by giving him a high five. Grier signed with Buffalo a week later.
-Patrick Marleau tried to trim his eyebrows one time but accidently had the guard on the shaver set to "1" instead of "2". He didn't leave his house for a week.
- To propose to his wife, Patrick Marleau placed a diamond ring in her glass of champagne. But then he got nervous and forgot which glass was his, and ended up swallowing the ring. He was in the hospital for a week.
-Patrick Marleau tries to speak Spanish when ordering at Mexican restaurants.
-Patrick Marleau wears swim trunks when he showers in the locker room.
-The team was discussing their favorite SNL castmembers but the conversation died down when Marleau stated, "My favorite is Keenan Thompson."
-Patrick Marleau saw Pat Falloon at a team event. This was their exchange:
Falloon: How ya been?
Marleau: Good, you?
Falloon: Not bad.
Long pause
Marleau: It's hot here
Falloon: Yeah.
Long pause
Falloon: ...Well, I'll see you around.
Marleau: Coo'.
-When Bon Jovi is played in the HP Pavilion during a game, Marleau starts playing drums on his legs and bobbing his head until he feels Todd McClellan's hand on his shoulder. Then he stops.
-Patrick Marleau recently gave "The Talk" to his kids. The person who giggled the most? Patrick Marleau.
-Patrick Marleau likes the NHL on Versus because it normally leads right into his favorite fishing show.
-Patrick Marleau once playfully asked Dany Heatley what was on his shirt, then when Heatley looked down Marleau flicked Heatley's nose with his finger. Dany Heatley has hated Patrick Marleau ever since.
-When Marleau walks down a hallway and someone is walking towards him he always averts eye contact until the last moment so he can look up, give them a nod and say, "What's up?" but then the person walking towards him will say, "What's up?" first so he'll end up shouting, "Pretty good!" over his shoulder 5 feet after they've passed.
-On the team plane Marleau insists on sitting in the middle seat.
-Patrick Marleau wears socks at the beach.
-Marleau spends most of his free time practicing post-goal group hugs with whoever will humor him.
-Patrick Marleau's second least favorite thing in the world is losing a hockey game. His least favorite thing is making banter while getting a hair cut.
-Patrick Marleau ate at the cool kid's table in high school for 2 years before someone finally asked, "Who the hell are you?"
-Patrick Marleau bought a mini-disc player. Last week. When asked why, he said it was because it only used one battery.
-Patrick Marleau was a great Hide 'n Seek player as a kid because no one ever wanted to find him.
8 recs |
72 comments
|
Comments
Awesome
Space Weed Says (Insert Generic quote about blog here)
"DO NOT get stuck behind Kyle Wellwood in the buffet line. This isn't really etiquette, but it will prevent you from starving to death"- Down Goes Brown on Etiquette for Jason Spezza's wedding
by Kevin Sellathamby on Feb 1, 2010 6:27 AM PST reply actions
When the team goes out Patrick Marleau orders one beer, drinks half of it slowly, then acts like it’s a new beer when the guys go for the next round. At some point he utters, “Man I’m buzzed.”
these guys are the worst!!! the anti-spade….I make sure I let out a big “you got to be fuckiing kidding me”
-Patrick Marleau tries to speak Spanish when ordering at Mexican restaurants.
hahaha
great..great list….holy shit….
for the record i am pissed i didnt come up with the rudy kelly rants website…man is that a kick in the balls for a monday morning!!
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 6:33 AM PST reply actions
for the record i am pissed i didnt come up with the rudy kelly rants website…man is that a kick in the balls for a monday morning!!
Great website, but I’m bummed he/she doesn’t provide a link to each of the comments. Would make it a whole lot better.
Fear The Fin: Where Selling Your Soul Is The Likely Solution
-Patrick Marleau sings in his church’s choir.
But I’m sure he’s a tenor — that’s a whole different ballgame.
http://www.battleofcali.com/
Marleau changes all the rules when it comes to everything.
This dude is an alto, no question.
by 88fingerslukee on Feb 1, 2010 7:19 AM PST up reply actions
yea i guess patrick wont be getting one of those mispelled shirts i made…or maybe hes so awkward he might?
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 7:27 AM PST up reply actions
His least favorite thing is making banter while getting a hair cut.
I’m with him on this one. I hate this shit with a passion.
by 88fingerslukee on Feb 1, 2010 7:17 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
i got nervous about bantering with my bartender (got shave my head now) cuz id rather him concentrating on my hair…then him asking me about mindless bullshit
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 7:26 AM PST up reply actions
haha…damn it must be monday…just noticed i did that…um yea…although bartenders arent suppose to be drinking…so its possible they could give good haircuts….although my favorite bartender…takes shots with me…so yea..probally not a good idea…shes the best man..really spikes my shit good..i love her
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 3:03 PM PST up reply actions
It’s even worse when he gets his hair cut at a Hispanic salon.
Fear The Fin: Where Selling Your Soul Is The Likely Solution
Ski lift and making banter with the barber were my favorites. Great stuff Rudy.
Fear The Fin: Where Selling Your Soul Is The Likely Solution
Patrick Marleau recently gave “The Talk” to his kids. The person who giggled the most? Patrick Marleau.
Makes you wonder how he even manages to have sex. Wait, not something I want to wonder. Boyle wouldn’t have these issues.
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 8:51 AM PST reply actions
I have to admit, the first thought I had when I read that was, “Isn’t his oldest like, three?”
"I think I realized after the second or third punch, I should have taken his helmet off sooner." - Ryane Clowe
Proud member of the "Re-Sign Marleau" Club
Fools and Sages
Seriously. The lack of hard facts ruined this entire article for me.
Fear The Fin: Where Selling Your Soul Is The Likely Solution
Ha ha ha. Sorry for sucking the fun out of it, guys.
And in my defense, I thoroughly laughed at the rest of it, but The Talk one just took me out of it, for some reason.
"I think I realized after the second or third punch, I should have taken his helmet off sooner." - Ryane Clowe
Proud member of the "Re-Sign Marleau" Club
Fools and Sages
hey plank..off subject…i chose a goldshalger shot over a patron shot…i gotta tell u…goldshlager fucked me up after one shot..patron usually takes at least 2 or 3….hmmmm…i was quite surprised by that fact
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 9:31 AM PST up reply actions
I hate that liquorish tasting crap. I’ll stick with Tequila.
"Douglas Murray is a humongous human being." – Drew Remenda
ill remember that when i buy u your next shot my friend…hope to see again next time…ill come up to san jose next year for sure…im planning on it(assumiung u live there..if not..well im going anyways)
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 12:08 PM PST up reply actions
oh! Spade in SJ … that should be fun … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 1:04 PM PST up reply actions
i would paint the town orange-gold and black..and subsquently get shot….ive been there before did a show..went to a bar all decked out in sharks hockey…nice place small
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 1:23 PM PST up reply actions
Never too early to start some form of “the talk” with children … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 9:24 AM PST up reply actions
I love this.
"Shave it, and you will score." - Randy Hahn
Proud member of the "Don't Trade Marleau" Club
Patrick Marleau may some day see this list and feel sad. Then he’ll remember he’s one of the top scorers in the NHL, playing on the number-one team in the league, a multi-millionaire, and an Olympian. Then he’ll realize he forgot to put deodorant on his left armpit in the morning.
Never go to the South for any reason.
by Megalodon on Feb 1, 2010 9:14 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
you could just take 2 fingers and rub off some from the right armpit and take care of the left…of course depends on what kind u use and the amount…this is another story of what someone else did and not me personally
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 9:29 AM PST up reply actions
Patrick Marleau was going to tell Todd McLellan about all the “awkward” jokes he saw on BoC. But he forgot how to spell awkward and left McLellan’s office without saying anything.
the answer is yes mike..we need to add to the t-shirt list..your avatar….great icon
that reminded me of in the movie coming to america…and this exhange:
Prince Akeem: Sir, did you happen to catch the professional football contest on television last night?
Cleo McDowell: No, I didn’t.
Prince Akeem: Oh sir, the Giants of New York took on the Packers of Green Bay. And in the end, the Giants triumphed by kicking an oblong ball made of pigskin through a big “H”. It was a most ripping victory.
Cleo McDowell: Son.
Prince Akeem: Yes?
Cleo McDowell: If you want to keep working here, stay off the drugs.
Prince Akeem: Yes.
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 9:25 AM PST up reply actions
You know what I want to see is that awkward smile in awkward silence over a not-so-awkward cap-friendly contract extension.
I would like to see that as well.
Especially because all the Toronto fan/vultures are circling him.
"I think I realized after the second or third punch, I should have taken his helmet off sooner." - Ryane Clowe
Proud member of the "Re-Sign Marleau" Club
Fools and Sages
That’s the one city in all of the NHL I can’t imagine him playing in… Hey look, huge amounts of media attention and you get to play for Ron Wilson again.
Good luck with that.
"Douglas Murray is a humongous human being." – Drew Remenda
Come on, Kelly.
You pissed on the fire with your Chuck Norris facts when all you had to do was take a screenshot of the video at 1:44.
MISS SAN JOSE GRAND PRIX
PATRICK MARLEAU
I like my goals like I like my booze..... Top shelf.
by GhostOfLinkGaetz on Feb 1, 2010 10:13 AM PST reply actions
When the real Miss San Jose Grand Prix approached the car, he thought she was trying to usurp his crown, and wrestled her for her sash and tiara for ten minutes.
I prefer my Kool-Aid spiked
Shattered Bromance: A Tragically Awkward Tale
Patrick Marleau once had a stalker, Rudy Kelly, who was the closest thing he’d had to a bro in years. Despite repeated warnings from his wife ("Stop trying to make ‘friends’ happen, Patrick") he refused to get a restraining order, telling himself that really they had a lot in common—frightening children, looking too long at other guys’ crotches in the john, being more comfortable around dogs than humans, etc. (He was 100% correct about this.)
Once Rudy accidentally stopped heckling him long enough to share a real discussion in in the park:
Patrick: Squirrels! Look at them, uh, so cute. Hee hee hee.
Rudy (giggling): I know, right? Their fluffy tails, when they twitch like – I mean, SHUT UP, LOSER. (flees)
Patrick didn’t mind the heckling at all – it formed the basis of all his close relationships, really, especially with his mother, his children, and his wife. So when Rudy was discovered hiding in the Marleaus’ bedroom closet, his wife screamed, but Patty just smiled and waved "Hi."
Rudy fled as best he could with his pants around his ankles. He was tackled easily by the police three blocks later, when concerned neighbors summoned them.
Patrick still tried to post bail on Rudy’s behalf, but the police overruled him.
I prefer my Kool-Aid spiked
by Niesy on Feb 1, 2010 11:02 AM PST reply actions 2 recs
HAHAHA
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 11:06 AM PST up reply actions
and to think you use to be so innocent when you first started coming around these parts … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 11:10 AM PST up reply actions
we “rubbed” off beautifully methinks…..theres that word again
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 1, 2010 11:12 AM PST up reply actions
Patrick Marleau tried to spice things up with his wife by getting a sex swing. Now it’s his “Gamecube chair.”
Bettman's Nightmare: A Blog Where Hockey Aficionados Dismantle That Mighty Empire, One Balsillie at a Time
http://bettmansnightmare.blogspot.com/
by Bettman's Nightmare on Feb 1, 2010 1:50 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
Hahaha
Great article. Sad thing is, I could see Patty doing all this stuff.
"I think people were ready to watch some hockey. We took up enough of everyone’s time."
-Jody Shelley after an 87 second hockey fight against Cam Janssen
Wow.
Marleau is a studmuffin :P
Dallas Stars 4 Life: Stars Blogging From Hockeyville, Iowa
I'm a girl. The screen name can be misleading, I understand.
by Brad_Richards_Rocks on Feb 1, 2010 4:11 PM PST reply actions
It's funny because he is better than all the guys on the Kings!
Proud member of the "Don't Trade Marleau" club.
Fear the Fin: Where Sharks Fans Aren't Like Other Sharks Fans.
by SharksFanEst.1994 on Feb 1, 2010 7:30 PM PST reply actions
I don’t believe that changes the facts he’s presenting tho … :)
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 9:00 PM PST up reply actions
wait a second now … that’s a fact I can’t get behind … falls more in the opinion column and Dan Boyle = sex god. Drew Doughty should consider himself lucky if Boyle lets him shine his shoes.
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin
by ang6666 on Feb 1, 2010 10:01 PM PST up reply actions
Drew Doughty should consider himself lucky if Boyle lets him shine his shoes.
So what if the pics of him in a fluffy robe haven’t surfaced yet — Drew’s body is too bootylicious to deny.
I think our relationship is on the rocks, now. Fie.
In Dinglebarn We Trust
bootylicious
love that word..i need to incorporate that more into my vocabulary
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 2, 2010 10:52 AM PST up reply actions
your pre-maturely ejaculating…hell pass him up someday though…sooner than later
I usually end up doing somthing stupid...count on it
LONG LIVE BOC (and from the rink)!!
GO DUCKS!!!
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Feb 2, 2010 10:52 AM PST up reply actions
Dan Boyle is better than Drew Doughty…at not being able to ride all the rides at Disneyland (because he’s short, you see..)
by Nut on Feb 3, 2010 9:29 AM PST up reply actions
Patrick Marleau once tried to avoid an awkward moment, just to see what it felt like.
It was going so well until he mentioned that Harry Kim was his favourite Star Trek character…
SNN Sports - A theoretical Oilers blog (i.e. theoretically, I write stuff there). Link now 100% less broken.

by 



























