Greatest game day post ever.

I once killed a hooker.

Get in line pal.

No one even wanted the Goddamn donuts so I’ve had like 3 already today. People are so ungrateful today, you know?

yea i found this out when i tried to be nice and buy donuts for everyone..its been like this for like 6 years at least..think cuz everyone trying to eat healthy..i guess u need to buy fuckin rice cakes or somthing…it only works in huge offices where theres ugly people who dont care..im sure donuts are popular in DMV offices..even though..since its a large office you “over buy” so in short fuck buying donuts

I once killed a hooker.

i assume u got services first before you did..cuz that would be such a waste…or worse yet u serviced yourself after?

p.s.
if rudy worked at a doughnut shop..i think he would fill the creme donuts himself…just a hunch

p.s.s.
does anyone eat the plain no-frosting circular donuts?..they seem complelty useless…except for may a c*%k ring

Try going into a chain donut shop (Krispy Krap comes to mind) and see if that “Baker’s Dozen” theory pans out for you………..

I shot water out of my nose when I read “which really sucks because I love nuts!”

Awhile ago, my roommate and I were both at training in Irvine for 2 days, we were getting reimbursed for our parking because the parking was like 10 bucks a day. When we left the first day I pulled up to the parking attendant and the Asian lady asks for my ticket, and just to be a dick I told her I just got there a little while ago and a guy let me in and did not provide me a ticket. She gave me a suspicious look and asked for 2 bucks (the minimum I guess).

Day two, my roommate and I pull up to the booth at the end of the day, and to my delight, the same Asian lady is working the booth. Again she asks for my ticket, and again I tell her a just got there a little while ago and a dude let me in and did not give me a ticket. This time she asks me what "the dude" looked like, and I replied "he was wearing a blue jacket like you." (her uniform).

So she says 2 dollars, I give her a five, and as she is getting my change she says "you know what I think?, I think you just make that story up" it’s totally quiet as I’m pulling away and I tell my buddy "you know, I think she may be on to us"

Fuck we laughed almost the whole way home.

Don’t know why RK’s post reminded me of that, just did.

Since you guys are giving your asian women stories, let me share mine that just happened. Not nearly as funny, but very annoying.

The boys’ grandmother is Japanese. Born and raised in Japan. It is due to this that to her, everything Asian is so much better than everything else not Asian

So my youngest had a joint middle school / high school concert last Friday. He plays the string bass. His grandmother, along with myself and his dad went to listen to the concert. His grandmother between myself and his dad. His best friend is up there playing the violin and he’s Chinese and his grandmother says “oh he’s good isn’t he”? Sure he is we say. Very good.. She goes “yeah, I knew that. orientals are very good with music”. I glance at the boys’ dad so wanting to comment and he just shakes his head at me.

Another one of my son’s friends plays the piano, also Chinese, very well. The boys’ dad tells her that last year he was playing the violin but this year took up the piano. And again she says, “oh of course he’s good, orientals are so good with their fingers”.

Why me??

Lemme guess, you wrote Doughty and then noticed he had the word “Dough” in his name, and hence this story was written

Doughnuts::Donuts as Light::Lite. The latter choice is passable, but whatevs.

Doughnuts. Mmm. We have a rule in our house that if someone says doughnuts more than once, we have to go out and get some. So this post happened because I was going to make Drew Doughnuts shaped like number eights, didn’t it?* The only hangup was filling vs. frosting. I think both.

(*And serve Meat-train loaf with Greenes for dinner. God I am lame.)

Anyway, I think the UN should get on banning all human contact with you, STAT. That poor lady really did do you a favor, and you know it. Next time she should just sprinkle your order with urine and come out ahead.

Donuts aren’t good for you… which is why I have a dozen every day :) Okay, maybe once every four months or so.

Rudy, I could have used a donut today after I spilled my coffee all over the floor. (MARLEAU FACE)

Is “I threw in an extra one” Los Angelese for “hand job?”

Also, congrats Kings fans! Phil saw his shadow, so there’s two more weeks before the Kings’ perennial standings dive.

I’m just sayin’

You are predicting you are going to kill a hooker or already killed one?

Oooookay, now all the Leafs peeps are going nuts about Exelby to the Kings. And the Leafs won against the backup goalie for the Devils, so cue the Irrational Exuberance/offers to give Burkie naked victory massages.

Heidi is at least bumpable. Patrick is just…um. Patricky.

Hey, are there going to be other Kings fans here tonight? All four of us? Sniff.

Anybody see the newest article at From the Rink?

WOULD YOU KINGS FUCKING SCORE ALREADY?

Okay, that’s out of my system.

No it isn’t.

Oh my God, Drew’s tongue.

Rhyno Smyth making Rudy proud with that goal…

DAMMIT, KINGS. FUCKING…just…FUCK. Stop it right now.

Yeah, real inventive here!

I think I need some help dealing with this Kings squad.