My Stripper Story

by RudyKelly on Jul 9, 2010 10:12 AM PDT

I know, you thought I was gone, but I remembered this story just now and I didn't think I had told it here before.

I went to a strip club when I was 19. They were dancing or whatever and in the corner they had ESPN on. I had missed the Kings game that night so I was watching the ticker to see if they had won. (They did!) A stripper came over to me and we had this conversation:

"Candy" or "Sasha" or whatever the fuck: Hey baby, want a dance?

Your Noble Blogger: (*never taking eyes off screen) Nah, I'm good.

"C"o"S"oWTF: Are you.. are you watching the TV?

YNB: (*sees score, pumps fist) Alright.! ...What's that?

"C"o"S"oWTF: You're a fag.

YNB: (*dejected) I just wanted to see the score...

Tweet Comment 11 comments | 1 recs |

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Comments

lap dances are for suckers.
You can rub your own dick while watching naked chicks and it only costs a dollar.

hopefully you dont gay up your buddies bachelor party too much.

Amo la manera una haba y el burrito del queso siente alrededor de mi pene.

by tu madre on Jul 9, 2010 10:23 AM PDT reply actions

Well, I got restaurant reservations overlooking the water at sunset so… too late?

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Jul 9, 2010 10:35 AM PDT up reply actions

man, this whole time I thought you just a metrosexual. Learn something new everyday I guess.

Amo la manera una haba y el burrito del queso siente alrededor de mi pene.

by tu madre on Jul 9, 2010 10:50 AM PDT up reply actions

That reminds me of another story, when my roommate Matt bumped into some cowboy (seriously, he was wearing a cowboy hat and Wranglers) in Vegas and the guy said some shit to him. Mat said something like, “Fuck you,” and the guy said, “Why don’t you go put on some more hair gel, fag?” Matt replied, “Hey buddy, this isn’t hair gel; this is product.”

It was hilarious.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Jul 9, 2010 11:21 AM PDT up reply actions 7 recs

hahahaha

Amo la manera una haba y el burrito del queso siente alrededor de mi pene.

by tu madre on Jul 9, 2010 11:57 AM PDT up reply actions

That’s marvelous.

When I'm not battling in California:
Cycle Like The Sedins

by jamestobrien on Jul 9, 2010 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions

thats awesome rec’d

2009-2010 Anaheim Ducks.."Hey at least were not the sharks!!"

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Jul 9, 2010 12:19 PM PDT up reply actions

You posted this just in time.

And I hope you find it through this endless wandering.

by brokenyard on Jul 9, 2010 10:54 AM PDT reply actions

Are you really going to let them take your phone? Kings news obviously > strippers.

In Dinglebarn We Trust

by Niesy on Jul 9, 2010 11:09 AM PDT reply actions

You know what’s awesome? Every time for the rest of today at work, if I visit BoC and my boss happens to glance at my computer screen, it’s going to say in big black block letters at the top “MY STRIPPER STORY”

Well done, Rudy.

The Spirit of MeatTrain'10!

by DodgerBlueBalls on Jul 9, 2010 12:22 PM PDT reply actions