Ducks-Sharks Recap: STATS!STATS!STATS!STATS! EVERYBODY!

Patron on the rocks and I?m ready for some stats

The women come around everytime I showing stats

Their panties hit the ground everytime I give em stats

So cups in the air, everybody lets take shots.

hey its early but lets look at some early stats and see if some trends are developing..also give some takes on last nites awesome ducks victory!!

your early  plus minus leader? drum roll please

Sheldon Brookbank mountain (+4) TREND? no he wont lead the ducks in +- no fuckin way..but he might have a good year having maturing Sbisa as his partner

worse? LUBO!!!....huh? (-4) TREND? no fuckin way as well...lydman should make this rise..and Lubo misfired barely on a couple scores..hell connect.eventually

your early  hits leader? drum roll please

Ryan Baldy Getzlaf(16)!! TREND? yes, his game is to forecheck and bang and he plays better that way...Ryan naturally a close 2nd (13)..Sbisa at (11)..Ryan and Getzlaf banging and setting up the sniper/garbage goal scorer perry..starting to work beatutifully

your early  blocks leader? drum roll please

Francois Beauchemin(18)!! TREND? oh yes...frankie has rubbed off on cammy and sbisa..both with (12), the real question whos the forward with the most?..commish gordon and getzlaf thats who with(6)..that trend should continue with his excellent work on the PK, DSP surprisingly has zero

your early  shots on goal leader? drum roll please
yea no mystery here MVPerry (17) with teemu right behind Trend? of course...but which D guy? Lubo "I don't need no foot" Vishnosky (9)

your early  penalty minute leader not named parros? drum roll please
yea no mystery here MVPerry (10)..TREND? lets hope not..keeping this down was key for the mvp season last year..and i think hell get his head out of his ass and take less..curiously these players havent taken a penalty yet..some intresting names: selanne, Frankie, Fowler, Gordon, Hiller lol...again look frankie and fowler no penalties...both hitting..both not taking penalities

ok lets gloat about last nites victory now

-huge early season win against a division opponent..ducks on the road..2nd of a back to back..with the backup goalie...watching that 3rd period..how smart was it to use the only fresh ducks player to save the victory as the rest of the team was gassed 10 mins to go in the 3rd. ELLIS WAS:

consequently he has a wad like this in his pocket at all times

41 saves...and some beatuies as the ducks defense took a step backwards...either because of fatigue or the desperate play of the sharks...I thought Sbisa had a below average game...played soft in the zone...coughed up the puck too many times...hed better watch it foster is creaming his pants to get into the line-up..first duck dman who shows signs of weakness like santana in american me..will get shanked and eat pine

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that red tackling dummy = joe pavelski 

apparently the ducks read my sit down with martin crane and punished "mouth always ready for penis" joe pavelski...2 big hits on him..one from frankie and I think getzlaf or someone else plowed him over...pavs was also stoned by ellis on a good oppurtitnity....I cant imagine he loves playing the ducks....I thought we did well against thier top line forced them to break it up...I could only remember once seeing joe thorton set up behind the net where hes most dangerous...tip of the cap ducks

-speaking of tip of the cap..how bout the PK 1 for 6...a wicked shot by burns withstanding...the speed on the PK is just awesome to watch...the guys are closing fast on the PP players..and clearing rebounds quickly when the puck gets on net...Gordon, mace, DSP, Cogs...well done...as a ducks fan you dont have the sense of "oh shit" anymore when we get a call against us..and thats nice...itll take a perfect brett burns type shot to beat us it seems

 quick takes:

-mcmuffin was finally useful(earls words) on the 2nd line with an assist...will he get a longer look?

-frankie a beast: 24min ice time, 7 blk shots, 2 hits, +1 and a puck of the noggin...couple stiches and back in the game...no sweat off his balls

-kudos to doug murray and Lubo also for taking pucks of the foot and coming back..hockey players rock

-mace 50% on faceoffs..but 2 stupid penalties...stop that mace you know your my dawg

-bobby ryan with 5 hits...forgot who he steamrolled but im sure whomever it was knew it was ryan

-koivu: 15 faceoff wins..whos got him for fantasy?

and the sharks well? again: