Sharks Gameday: Righteous Gentiles
by Megalodon on Oct 29, 2011 5:01 AM PDT
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In my continuing effort to theme all my gameday posts around my favorite movies, I've run into a bit of trouble. My 74th-favorite film of all time is Schindler's List. After thinking long and hard about what to write for today's gameday, I asked Rudy for advice. This turned out to be a mistake, and I was horrified by the incredibly offensive suggestions he offered. In the end I decided it was probably best to not try to make any Schindler's List hockey jokes at all due to the film's sensitive subject.
I mean any Schindler's List hockey jokes aside from the picture caption up there, of course. Sorry about that.
After the jump I'll do my best to wash that offensive taste out of your brain.
This is the newest commercial in the Sharks' "lousy" series. A couple of observations:
1. When Brent Burns looks directly at the camera his chin disappears, and he looks really funny.
2. Everyone knows pythons aren't poisonous, right? I had trouble suspending my disbelief for this commercial.
3. Though Brent Burns is indeed handling snakes in this video, he is not acting like what people normally mean when they say "snake handler." That usually refers to a fine gentleman like this. He's really being more of a "lousy wildlife expert."
4. Even though this commercial fails on several different levels, it's still hilarious and I love it.
5. I wish Brent Burns had been cast on "Two and a Half Men" instead of Ashton Kutcher.
Anyways, tonight the Sharks face the Islanders. The only thing that made this game exciting in the tiniest bit was the possibility of Nabokov starting against the Sharks, but since Nabby left his last game with a lower-body issue (right before the shootout, oddly) chances are this isn't going to happen. So there's really not much special about this game at all.
Prediction: Sharks win 7-4 in a very exciting game, just to prove me wrong. An obscure NHL record is broken as all eleven goals are scored by Jewish players.
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I pardon you.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
Oh by the way, “Righteous Gentiles” is a real thing and is also my number-one favorite hypothetical band name ever.
“Tonight, live at the Gibson – RIGHTEOUS GENTILES!”
Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California
I’m sorry, but this latest commercial is bullshit. I can buy that Joe Thornton doesn’t know ventriloquism, or Marc-Edouard Vlasic is a bad groundskeeper, but to tell me that BRENT BURNS, OWNER OF A THOUSAND SNAKES, somehow doesn’t know how to properly control his pythons is ridiculous. And furthermore,
(*Is shot in the head by Ralph Fiennes)
by RudyKelly on Oct 29, 2011 8:09 AM PDT reply actions 3 recs
(Quoting myself from twitter:)
It’s weird that @Burnzie88 , animal lover, is friends with @OwenNolan11 , slayer of beasts.
Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California
Twitter makes strange bedfellows.
By the way, get on that Picklesnake t-shirt, willya?
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 8:39 AM PDT up reply actions
Still sorry we didn’t get to see Devin Setoguchi, Lousy Valet
by meetyourmako on Oct 29, 2011 9:48 AM PDT up reply actions
Well, he had plenty of trouble parking pucks in the net…
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 9:49 AM PDT up reply actions
yea nice touch they show burns scoring against the ducks…fuck you..
"Lots of people ride the waves of disruption that he provides."
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 29, 2011 9:13 AM PDT reply actions
#poop
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 9:50 AM PDT up reply actions
He’s only got two goals as a Shark and the other one was a weak, deflected wristshot.
by meetyourmako on Oct 29, 2011 9:51 AM PDT up reply actions
cuz they worked last year
Subject line: Message sent with high importance!
Dear Sharks,
Stop winning, world enjoyed laughing at you losing.
Sincerly the pacific division
"Lots of people ride the waves of disruption that he provides."
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 29, 2011 9:16 AM PDT reply actions
I'm sorry, world here, we find it more hilarious to see the Ducks win the Cup and then suck for years to come.
Plus the Sharks are animal right activists (snakes, Mammoths, Sharks, ect….), so we want them to continue to make you their bitches.
Sincerely, The Pacific Division
I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.
by Diamondback15 on Oct 29, 2011 9:27 AM PDT up reply actions
ahem 09?
"Lots of people ride the waves of disruption that he provides."
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Oct 29, 2011 10:11 AM PDT up reply actions
I wonder if the Sharks winning a cup would be hilarious, too. Questions we’ll never be able to answer, I guess.
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Oct 29, 2011 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Booooooo…
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 12:07 PM PDT up reply actions
Dear the rest of the Pacific Division,
Fuck you!
Sincerely,
The Sharks
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
by Angy on Oct 29, 2011 9:34 AM PDT up reply actions 5 recs
So i take it this site finally found a line it wasnt willing to cross?
"Its not so much me as it is Roenick, hes good" - Vince Vaughn
"Its not so much Kontos as it is me, I'm good." - Angryjay93
Yeah, I still can't get over a python being poisonous, it would have been cooler with a rattlesnake.
Everything is cooler with rattlesnakes.
I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.
I've decided, Burns is now my favorite Shark.
And I am going to get a poisonous snake license and buy a rattlesnake so I can hang out with Burns and talk snakes all day.
I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.
by Diamondback15 on Oct 29, 2011 9:33 AM PDT up reply actions
GO SHARKS!
I’m actually glad Nabby isn’t playing tonight – I don’t want to see our guys hammering him.
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Or him shutting out our guys…
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 9:42 AM PDT up reply actions
This would have been the more likely scenario.
I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.
by Diamondback15 on Oct 29, 2011 9:49 AM PDT up reply actions
damnit
My O-for-Meg’s-list streak is snapped. I knew it was a bad idea to see that movie. At least allow me to set this bag of poo alight before I run away; Spielberg is wildly, wildly overrated. (starts booking it)
by dikfor on Oct 29, 2011 11:05 AM PDT via iPhone app reply actions
Is it totally wrong of me to want the Sharks to completely humiliate the Islanders cause there are so many Nabby haters over there?
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Actually
from what i’ve seen a lot of them have come around on Nabby now that he’s actually reported.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
Okay, I know that Meg christened the top line as MarJoe (which is great), but…
…I was watching last night and after Patty and Pavs perfectly assisted Jumbo’s smooth breakaway goal, I came up with:
Jo-Jo Ma
Technical precision, emotion, and consistent excellence. Thoughts?
Oh yeah, and I love Havlat so far.
Go Sharks.
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 3:18 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
JoJo Ma? Really? I give up on you guys.
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Don’t blame anyone else, it was just me.
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 3:42 PM PDT up reply actions
I like it!
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
High five!
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
That was a good anthem
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
GOAL!!!
17 seconds … woohooo!
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Music to my ears…
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 4:19 PM PDT up reply actions
HOOCHIE MAMA!
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
What the fuck? There is actually someone who has never seen Ghost Busters.
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
For shame Randy
for shame…
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
Sharks are trying to give me a heart attack!
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Go Sharks!
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 5:52 PM PDT up reply actions
That was dirty!
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
As stupid as that was
Nice to see out of KO…cleaned his effing clock out.
NY Islanders, just one irrational free agent signing away from contention!
Website:Lighthouse HockeyTwitter: @KeithLHHockey
by Keith Quinn on Oct 29, 2011 6:27 PM PDT reply actions
Always sad to see when people accept dirty plays.
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Agreed
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
holy cow … 4 on 3??
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
wow … can’t blame them for being annoyed with that call
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Fuck them.
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 6:41 PM PDT up reply actions
High five!
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
Playing like Righteous Gentiles?
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 6:44 PM PDT up reply actions
I’ll take it.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
Damn straight.
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 6:43 PM PDT up reply actions
Yay!
Ugh, I always feel conflicted in these situations. I’m glad the Sharks took advantage, but wow, that call was bad.
Every other team would take advantage too … so … :)
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
SO STOP FEELING SORRY FOR THEM.
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 29, 2011 6:42 PM PDT up reply actions
I hate the way it ended … but … given that Pickles non-icing wasn’t called … and the elbow bullshit … you know, a win is a win is a win. :)
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
You can’t expect them to Czech the replay for every call!
by meetyourmako on Oct 30, 2011 1:49 PM PDT up reply actions
Your commenting history is becoming more Czechered…
It is that thing that I sent to you.
by whine_country on Oct 30, 2011 2:57 PM PDT up reply actions
You know, it was a bad call – but not like they can review every call made to see if it’s a good call. Good calls, bad calls, non-calls – it all evens out by the end of the season anyways.
GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)
Meh
I think they can review those kinds of calls and they should. It’s not like they blew it dead. Play had already stopped and it’s not hard to check the video to review that.
Still though, bad calls happen. It’s part of the game.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
Kent Huskins cares.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
"Pavs with great feed but what a release by Wingels Peanut Butter Baby!"" - Jamie Baker
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