NHL's Critics Find No Evidence That Penalty Box Reforms Players

"According to the report, an astonishing 100 percent of players have spent time incarcerated for rule violations during their careers.

Even more shocking, according to the report, is the 100 percent rate of recidivism."

6 months ago Megalodon 21 comments 0 recs |

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Read More: penalty box, nhl, satire, the onion

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Alex Ovechkin Having Trouble Following Puck On TV

President of the Brent Burns Robotic Sex-Pants Fan Club.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Nov 18, 2011 8:27 AM PST reply actions

Nobody show this to Red Wings fans. They'll be offended by the pompous arrogance on display.

President of the Brent Burns Robotic Sex-Pants Fan Club.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Nov 18, 2011 9:07 AM PST reply actions 10 recs

I’m rec’ing this like a Hot Pickle on Taco Torrey

resident cartoonist @CouchTarts
Lightning is seven times as hot as the surface of the sun.
That’s still not as hot as Douglas Murray. -mymclife

by CTGray on Nov 18, 2011 9:54 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs

You are a boobie…

It is that thing that I sent to you.

by whine_country on Nov 18, 2011 9:56 AM PST up reply actions

You take your arrogant ellipsis and get out of here.

President of the Brent Burns Robotic Sex-Pants Fan Club.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Nov 18, 2011 9:58 AM PST up reply actions

Yeah, REAL MEN don’t use ELLIPSES. Only WOMEN use ELLIPSES and that’s BAD because VAGINAS ARE ICKY.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Nov 18, 2011 10:02 AM PST up reply actions 2 recs

cooties!

resident cartoonist @CouchTarts
Lightning is seven times as hot as the surface of the sun.
That’s still not as hot as Douglas Murray. -mymclife

by CTGray on Nov 18, 2011 10:03 AM PST up reply actions

Oh thank god Spade doesn’t come around here much on Fridays. This could get ugly fast.

GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)

by Angy on Nov 18, 2011 10:04 AM PST up reply actions

I was well aware of that when I posted. It seemed like a challenge.

resident cartoonist @CouchTarts
Lightning is seven times as hot as the surface of the sun.
That’s still not as hot as Douglas Murray. -mymclife

by CTGray on Nov 18, 2011 10:10 AM PST up reply actions

Next up on A2Y

“LAKE OF MAN TEARS AND HORRIBLE SELF-WORTH: LIVE BLOG IT!!!”

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Nov 18, 2011 11:47 AM PST up reply actions 3 recs

The Kings got shorthanded goals from Simon Gagne and Mike Richards (into an empty net), their first shorthanded goals of the season. It was the first time the Kings had scored two shorthanded goals in a game since Nov. 13, 2005, when Craig Conroy and Alexander Frolov scored in an 8-2 victory over Columbus.

I remember that game. It was glorious.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Nov 18, 2011 10:11 AM PST reply actions

And Rudy’s Fromance smolders on…

by dikfor on Nov 18, 2011 10:15 AM PST via mobile up reply actions

The Ducks should sign Frolov.

President of the Brent Burns Robotic Sex-Pants Fan Club.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Nov 18, 2011 10:21 AM PST up reply actions

If Lubo and Fro celebrated a Ducks goal together I would literally die.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Nov 18, 2011 10:27 AM PST up reply actions

Don’t worry — Carlyle’s still in charge.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Nov 18, 2011 10:28 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs

I would freaking LOVE to get Frolov. Frolov’s a beast, and he PK’s, and he’s got good chemistry with Handzus. He’d be perfect on our 3rd line.

by Khaaz on Nov 18, 2011 7:05 PM PST up reply actions

Haha

by lnickerson88 on Nov 19, 2011 7:47 AM PST via mobile up reply actions

I miss Craig Conroy.

^^^That would be a perfect place for an ellipsis, however I am too manly to use such feminine punctuation methods to signify my own aposiopesis.

"We will come with our guns blazing, and we just blazed." - Tim Leiweke

by DodgerBlueBalls on Nov 18, 2011 10:54 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs

I need a grant to go more indepth into this problem. It would allow me to study the problem across the league. Who’s with me.

Let's go Ducks.

by deb d on Nov 18, 2011 12:12 PM PST reply actions

I need a grant

Go Clitsome!

*today’s worst pun

It is that thing that I sent to you.

by whine_country on Nov 18, 2011 1:31 PM PST up reply actions

This is exactly why Sleek offers counseling to all players who find themselves so incarcerated. Many players try to incorporate his unique mix of encouragement and helpful tips. Alas, recidivism persists as one of the challenges of sitting in Row B. Seeing those young men wasting literally minutes of their lives like that really makes one question the system.

Surely, Sleek will get through to one of them. Then it will all be worth it.

by GordonBombay on Nov 18, 2011 3:31 PM PST via mobile reply actions