Kings Gameday: Ho Ho Ho

by RudyKelly on Dec 22, 2011 5:00 AM PST

Thursday, Dec 22, 2011, 7:00 PM PST
Staples Center

4 days before Christmas, the Kings hired themselves a Scrooge. Mike Chen served as the Ghost of Christmas Past, detailing the triumphs and tribulations of Darryl Sutter's reign as head coach of the San Jose Sharks. What can we expect from the Ghost of Christmas Present? A few things:

1) Good Lord is Sutter uncomfortable to watch. Imagine giving play-by-play to your mom on the night you lost your virginity. You'd be less awkward in that conversation than Darryl Sutter is every day of his life.

2) Nothing's changing. The Kings aren't going to start opening things up. Like Quisp said, the Kings aren't changing the system; they're changing the way it's taught. Hopefully Sutter encourages a more get up 'n go attitude to get more chances off the rush, but that's probably the only change we'll see.

3) Good players, good special teams? The biggest thing I remember from watching Darryl Sutter, and this may be me talking out of my ass, is that he puts a lot of responsibility on his best players to play special teams. Looking back at the 05-06 Flames, Jarome Iginla played 5 1/2 minutes a game on the power play and almost 3 minutes a game on the penalty kill. I think the Kings will look to get Anze Kopitar more and more time on special teams while rolling 3 lines to keep his even strength minutes down.

4) Quick is going to die. I don't think Darryl Sutter has a problem running his starting goaltender into the ground.

Sutter's press conferences was... I'm going to be honest, it was pretty horrible. He's weird and awkward and he makes me uncomfortable. But I care a lot less about that and a lot more about this:

Richardson-Kopitar-Brown

Gagne-Richards-Lewis

Penner-Stoll-Williams

Sutter? I'm still deciding. But this? I like this.

***

Wait, it's Ahn-zhay Ko-PEE-tar? Not KO-pi-tar? Huh. That sure is a language you got there, Anze!

I conducted a stringent scientific survey at my office and the girls decided that Davis Drewiske is the best looking King but Bernier is the hottest because he speaks French. They also thought that Jarret Stoll and Brad Richardson looked "too cocky." Women be objectifyin'.

There was also a rather loud "Awwww" when Andrei Loktionov came up on the screen but then they told me to stop.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go shovel snow and put antifreeze in my... oh wait, no I'm not, I live somewhere awesome. Happy holidays, everybody!

Prediction: Kings win, a billion to none. Goals by Kopitar (x billion).

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Comments

aww, that video was cute. and i kinda want that black Christmas tree ball

I could basically rant forever about the mispronouncing of the European names in NHL broadcasts…

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 5:26 AM PST reply actions

Rant away – I want to see it. :)

GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)

by Angy on Dec 22, 2011 6:33 AM PST up reply actions

in nutshell: my biggest issue with the announcers is that they don’t even seem to care that they’re slaughtering the names. They obviously have to know that the players are from countries where English is not the native language so they should realise that the rules that apply to pronouncing English don’t necessarily – and in most cases definitely don’t – apply to those names. So basically they’re either really arrogant or unfortunately ignorant

/add angry hand talking and Finnish accent to make it more hilarious

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 7:08 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs

haha i would love to see how Ahlers and Hayward try to pronounce the fins right :D hahaha

by Freakle on Dec 22, 2011 8:37 AM PST up reply actions

A Canadian friend once told me that the legendary announcer Foster Hewitt used to mangle French-Canadian names… and that was why English-speaking Canadians loved him.

"I think you just outed yourself as Dean Lombardi. I knew it all along." — Rudy Kelly

by DougX on Dec 22, 2011 11:07 AM PST up reply actions

I can see how it’s kind of a problem if it’s a player on a team they call games for often, but I wouldn’t get too mad about players they’re unfamiliar with.

By-foog-lee-an? You arrogant, racist son of a bitch.

If you imagine a salt shaker in your hand, tilt your head back
and act like you're shaking salt into your mouth; you will taste salt if you concentrate hard enough.

by brokenyard on Dec 22, 2011 4:36 PM PST up reply actions

hey for twenty years they call that guy “Selanne”… but that’s not his name :D

by Freakle on Dec 22, 2011 6:52 AM PST up reply actions

“salami shoots and he scores!”

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 6:56 AM PST up reply actions

Can you please make a pronunciation chart for our Eastern European players. My whole world is crumbling now that I know how Kopi’s name is pronounced. Ah! Even his nickname sounds weird now!

by DMcD on Dec 22, 2011 1:00 PM PST up reply actions

not sure if that’s sarcasm but in any case, here’s a link to charts* that have some slavic languages’ alphabets and what those said alphabets represent in phonetic alphabet

*in case it works, facebook is being a major bitch at the moment…

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

Hyvää joulua!

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 1:59 PM PST up reply actions

No sarcasm...

…I’m genuinely embarrased for our American TV broadcasters..

by DMcD on Dec 22, 2011 2:02 PM PST up reply actions

if it doesn’t work (it doesn’t for me… somehow facebook thinks i’m not allowed to modify nor watch my own stupid pics), i can post them on tumblr or something for better view

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

Hyvää joulua!

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 2:09 PM PST up reply actions

So this game should be interesting. I’ve been wondering if the Ducks ever plan on edging themselves closer to the 30 pts mark or are they comfortable in the 20s.

by Angy on Dec 22, 2011 6:35 AM PST reply actions

Interesting? This game is going to be like watching two snails go to war over a bed of salt…

Hail Poseidon!
http://5minutesformurder.blogspot.com

by 4Kills5 on Dec 22, 2011 6:52 AM PST up reply actions

Your analogy makes no sense.

For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.

by Nut on Dec 22, 2011 7:34 AM PST up reply actions 1 recs

two teams with no offensive capabilities (right now) trying to fight each other even though they are shrivelling up and dying anyways. Even if there is a winner there is no winner because either the Kings beat the worst team in the league and didn’t fix any problems or the Ducks manage to win but still have < 30 points.

Better? No? Leave me alone—its early…

Hail Poseidon!
http://5minutesformurder.blogspot.com

by 4Kills5 on Dec 22, 2011 7:56 AM PST up reply actions

You’re right, it’s actually bad to win a game because

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Dec 22, 2011 8:24 AM PST via mobile up reply actions

I meant more because why would two snails fight over a bed of salt, unless they’re suicidal?

For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.

by Nut on Dec 22, 2011 9:08 AM PST up reply actions

They were put there by carlyle and murray. They still fight because they hate each other.

Hail Poseidon!
http://5minutesformurder.blogspot.com

by 4Kills5 on Dec 22, 2011 9:17 AM PST up reply actions

I’m going to need you to illustrate this whole thing.

President of the Brent Burns Robotic Sex-Pants Fan Club.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Dec 22, 2011 9:31 AM PST up reply actions

If you need to map out an analogy and explain each symbolic relationship, you’ve already reached the point of structural failure.

"I think you just outed yourself as Dean Lombardi. I knew it all along." — Rudy Kelly

by DougX on Dec 22, 2011 11:08 AM PST up reply actions

Also is it an actual bed that they plan to sleep on or like a bed you find in nature. Because why would a snail want to sleep on that and if it’s one of those more natural ones I’m just not sure that’s where you would be bound to find snails in the first place. And I’m not sure what Carlyle and Murray would be doing alone in the woods together or whatever.

If you imagine a salt shaker in your hand, tilt your head back
and act like you're shaking salt into your mouth; you will taste salt if you concentrate hard enough.

by brokenyard on Dec 22, 2011 4:40 PM PST up reply actions 2 recs

I was ready to draw the whole thing up after work yesterday. Snails, fired coaches, beds of salt, epic fight to the death…

then I remembered that I’m lazy

Hail Poseidon!
http://5minutesformurder.blogspot.com

by 4Kills5 on Dec 23, 2011 7:11 AM PST up reply actions

A billion goals for Kopitar?

I think you’re forgetting who your coach is. It’s going to be a million goals, tops.

Enjoying the Shady Acres of hockey blogging retirement. No, that's not the Florida Panthers.

by Mike Chen on Dec 22, 2011 8:13 AM PST reply actions 1 recs

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to go shovel snow and put antifreeze in my… oh wait, no I’m not, I live somewhere awesome.

Haha yea can’t beat wearing a tshirt and shorts on a sunny Christmas day in California.

You can make their heads bleed in this one

by superfan#99 on Dec 22, 2011 8:18 AM PST reply actions

....

considering that i discovered that there had been snowing somewhere between midnight and noon when i woke up….

i want sunny and warm weather too!

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 8:36 AM PST up reply actions

god i miss that crazy sob :D

by Freakle on Dec 22, 2011 8:37 AM PST up reply actions

he should have his own tv show… i’m watching the 24/7 again and still laughing. though, i’ll probably never get a husky because of him but still… :P

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

Hyvää joulua!

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 8:39 AM PST up reply actions

I always get a humangous big laugh when watching bryz.

by ScottyKnows on Dec 23, 2011 9:19 AM PST up reply actions

Best way to handle Philly’s media EVER.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 2:30 PM PST up reply actions

Be patient, America and China are doing our best to make sure lobal warming becomes a reality.

Just wait another 30-50 years.

I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.

by Diamondback15 on Dec 22, 2011 6:46 PM PST up reply actions

global warming.

by Diamondback15 on Dec 22, 2011 6:46 PM PST up reply actions

But I like my lobes hot.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 10:13 PM PST up reply actions

Imagine giving play-by-play to your mom on the night you lost your virginity.

Is that a Patrick Marleau Fact?

Enjoying the Shady Acres of hockey blogging retirement. No, that's not the Florida Panthers.

by Mike Chen on Dec 22, 2011 8:18 AM PST reply actions

Patrick Marleau is still a virgin so no, no it is not.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Dec 22, 2011 8:25 AM PST via mobile up reply actions 5 recs

So then how did his wife get pregnant............

by Diamondback15 on Dec 22, 2011 6:47 PM PST up reply actions

I don’t think he knows that A leads to B anyway

If you imagine a salt shaker in your hand, tilt your head back
and act like you're shaking salt into your mouth; you will taste salt if you concentrate hard enough.

by brokenyard on Dec 22, 2011 6:59 PM PST up reply actions

Two possible answers: One suggests that we will see the Second Coming within our lifetimes. The other… doesn’t.

"I think you just outed yourself as Dean Lombardi. I knew it all along." — Rudy Kelly

by DougX on Dec 22, 2011 8:49 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs

The other may explain why his son bears an uncanny resemblance to Alyn McCauley.

"We will come with our guns blazing, and we just blazed." - Tim Leiweke

by DodgerBlueBalls on Dec 23, 2011 12:33 AM PST via mobile up reply actions

Stoll does look cocky, haha.

by lnickerson88 on Dec 22, 2011 8:53 AM PST via mobile reply actions

I conducted a stringent scientific survey at my office and the girls decided

sureeee

I conducted a stringent scientific survey ~~at my office and the girls~~ and I decided

by Mike in OC on Dec 22, 2011 1:38 PM PST reply actions

Have them conduct a survey of this! I just found it this morning.

I’m pretty sure Bernier’s second tattoo translates as “I am delicious eye candy.”

Also I think of Drewiske as a Ken doll, so he doesn’t have enough oomph. Good call on Stoll, though.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 2:27 PM PST reply actions

only 3 kings players have tats?

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

Hyvää joulua!

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 2:35 PM PST up reply actions

Greene, Clifford, Bernier, Lewis, Doughty, Hunter and Fraser all have tattoos.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Dec 22, 2011 2:39 PM PST up reply actions

i demand pics of those too!
unless they’re some number & letter combinations too…

Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.

Hyvää joulua!

by sleza on Dec 22, 2011 2:45 PM PST up reply actions

I’d like that, but even just with Bernier, Christmas came early.

Why was it hiding in the picture gallery for days? I just wanted to make some “Baby Ruth” Sutter macros, and bam.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 2:53 PM PST up reply actions

Richards, too.

I hope everyone knows I have no intention of facing this sober.

by McSwarley on Dec 23, 2011 5:47 PM PST up reply actions

Oh yeah and

The weirdest thing is that people usually complain that the system is too restrictive. That was true the previous few years but this year? The Kings have opened things up this season, I swear to God.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 2:58 PM PST reply actions

They did!

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Dec 22, 2011 3:28 PM PST up reply actions

Sorry! Not sure what happened to the latter part of my comment.

They did. Now I assume they were never really comfortable with the idea. DL’s immediate goal has shifted from becoming a contender to just making the playoffs. If they don’t, their goose is cooked.

Dinglebarnin' It JftC

by Niesy on Dec 22, 2011 4:16 PM PST up reply actions

A thousand times this:

I’m off to go shovel snow and put antifreeze in my… oh wait, no I’m not, I live somewhere awesome.

I think it was a bit cool today, dropped below 66.

by Diamondback15 on Dec 22, 2011 6:41 PM PST reply actions

Doesn’t Kopitar say his name the way we all do in that text and drive commercial?

by lafreak331 on Dec 22, 2011 11:54 PM PST reply actions

Yeah but he’s speaking english

For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.

by Nut on Dec 23, 2011 9:25 AM PST up reply actions

I notice more too. F3 is no longer D3, a few or more cross seam passes, and others besides the D setting up forfor one-timers. I have a wife about to be an exwife,who’s not sure now and i got drunk, hid my phone to avoid letting me give her a piece of my mind. Beyond that, woke up nxt to the salsa. God bless Lake L.A. Sade in victor hell can probably expound on Lake L.A. what a shitehole on the map of the anus of the world.

by MIK3Ysfv on Dec 23, 2011 11:42 PM PST via mobile reply actions