The Player you Most Love to Hate:
He's not that good! He's average! Stop sucking his dick, people!
Other Than Your Own, the Team You Can't Help Rooting For
I kinda like the Panthers new jerseys, and I'm interested to see how Dale Tallon does with his rebuild. He seems to be really good at drafting but fucking horrible at cap management, but that doesn't really matter right now. Plus, apparently they employ giants.
Seriously, is that guy really that big or is it a bad photoshop?
Favorite Fight or Brawl of All Time
Bryan Murray Fight (via bvivian)
I try not to make fun of speech impediments, as a rule, but I would have a real hard time not laughing if I was getting yelled at by someone with one. So kudos to you, Jim Fox. You are a stronger man that I.
The Hideous-Looking Hockey Jersey You Secretly Love the Most:
They haven't even worn them yet really but I've heard some negative responses to the Tampa Bay Lightning's new uniforms, but I really like them. They're ridiculously simple, and I like the two color scheme. Plus, for some reason it makes me think of the Incredibles.
Your Favorite Hockey Cliché
Why, Marc-Andre, of course!
The Injury You Couldn't Stop Staring At (Non-Skate Lacerations Only)
It scared the hell out me when Chris Pronger's heart got stopped by a slapshot back in '98. I didn't know that could happen, and I thought I saw a guy die on live TV. I think it was mostly the confused look on his face, and how he skated two strides and the crumpled. Luckily, he survived so I could hate his guts anew.
Your Favorite Cheesy Hockey Reference in Popular Culture
Finally, What's the Thing You Secretly Respect Gary Bettman for the Most?
The salary cap. Fuck you, Baseball.