FanPost

Hockey Guilty Pleasures

Apparently, we're doing this thing now.

Whatevs.

1. The Player You Most Love to Hate

Danny Heatley.

Do I really have to explain this?

2. Other Than Your Own, The Team You Can't Help Rooting For

I root for Phoenix, Nashville, Florida, Carolina, formerly Atlanta. Pretty much any sunbelt/southern/non-traditional market team that isn't a California team not based out of Anaheim. As a fan of another sunbelt/southern/non-traditional market team I can identify with those fans and I want their teams to do well, if only to make Canadians shut up.

Also, fuck Dallas.

3. Favorite Fight or Brawl of All-Time

Teemu Selanne vs Brad Richardson Fight April 9/2011 (via eXeDGaming)


Dude is 40 and has one fight under his belt. It's kind of a draw, but that's impressive. Also, did you see what Brookbank did to Clifford's face? That's the kind of thing that gets you the death sentence on twelve systems.

4. The Hideous-Looking Hockey Jersey You Secretly Love the Most

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5. Your Favorite Hockey Cliché (terminology, traditions, announcer-speak, etc.)

"That is not a penalty you want to take"

No shit Sherlock. Fuck you.

6. The Injury You Couldn't Stop Staring At (Non-Skate Lacerations Only)

When Manny Legace injured himself by tripping on the red carpet set out for Sarah Palin. As if we all needed another reason to hate her.

7. Your Favorite Cheesy Hockey Reference in Popular Culture

The South Park episode where Stan Marsh coaches a pee wee hockey team, and the Red Wings beat the shit out of them. Fuck the wings.

8. Finally, What's the Thing You Secretly Respect Gary Bettman for the Most?

Secretly? Nothing. Openly? He grew the NHL into a $3,000,000,000 a year business (one of the most profitable sports leagues in the world), expanded the league from an eastern U.S./Canadian thing into a continental league, instituted a salary cap so the smaller market teams can compete, and somehow keeps growing the NHL's fanbase and profitability in a recession, when the other three major leagues are losing ground or staying idle. All this, and he puts up with all the crap flung his way.

This FanPost was posted by a fan, and it probably sucks and is dumb.

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