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So long, peasants!

You people aren't worthy.

On September 7th of 2010, Fake Dan Ellis was born. One year and around 800 tweets later, it's time to call it quits.

I started Fake Dan Ellis in the midst of the #DanEllisProblems controversy. In the finest Internet tradition I stole a joke invented by someone else and rode it to stardom. I continued beating the corpse of the dead joke horse relentlessly for months, the steady flow of new followers feeding my twisted perseverance.

The highlight of the whole experience was probably the news article in Canada's National Post in which the real Dan Ellis was asked about Fake Dan Ellis. As Rudy pointed out at the time, I got a major media outlet to ask a professional athlete about a Twitter account that complains about the inflated price of top hats. I can now die happy.

I won't be tweeting as Fake Dan Ellis anymore, but I will still be writing here at Battle of California and on my associated Twitter account, @MegalodonBOC. If you've never visited our site before, welcome! If you thought Fake Dan Ellis was funny then you'll probably like what we do here. You don't need to be a fan of any California hockey team to enjoy stuff like our reviews of bad hockey movieshorrible hockey eBay stuff, and our Patrick Marleau Facts. Stick around - it's fun! 

Finally, I'd like to thank the following people for helping to make the Fake Dan Ellis experience fun for the past 365 days:

1. Whoever originally came up with the #DanEllisProblems meme. I've tried my best to figure out exactly who this was, but since I keep finding conflicting information I'll just leave it open here - if you know the answer please let me know in the comments. For now I'll just say: thanks for the inspiration, mysterious stranger!

(Update: @ryanclassic has been named as the possible source of #DanEllisProblems. If that is correct then thank you, sir.)

2. Grey Wyshynski. Intentionally or not, Puck Daddy's stories on the Dan Ellis Twitter controversy served to fan the flames and spread awareness of what was going on. Additionally, when I finally had a tweet re-tweeted by @wyshynski it resulted in an explosion of followers, which in turn inspired me to keep going long beyond the point of reason.

3. The fans. Thanks to everybody who said nice things about @FakeDanEllis on Twitter. I read everything you said, and it made it a lot easier to ignore the people who kept saying that I had jumped the shark every couple of months.

4. The three people who bought shirts from the Fake Dan Ellis T-shirt Emporium. You people are the greatest heroes of all. I hope you like your shirts.

5. The engineers of the trade that sent Dan Ellis to the Ducks. Six months into making fun of Dan Ellis and then he gets traded to one of my least favorite teams, which plays practically in my backyard? The hockey gods must love me, and hate the Ducks. This was seriously the best thing that could have happened to @FakeDanEllis short of the real Dan Ellis running over a homeless man with his Segway.

6. Most importantly, I'd like to thank Dan Ellis. He seems like a really nice guy, and I think most rational people can understand the frustration he was trying to express originally. And now that he's had some time to think about things, I'll bet he can see why some people got a bit annoyed by his comments.

Come back to Twitter, Real Dan Ellis. We miss you.

 

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because I just re-upped with Yahoo! and …

Congrats, man. You’re amazing over there.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 8:39 AM PDT up reply actions  

I didn’t realize Wysh had an SBN account.

Bring back PDR!

Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn

by PNK on Sep 12, 2011 2:56 PM PDT up reply actions  

Awesome

It’s impressive that you managed to keep it going so long and were so good at it. Also, @ryanclassic started #DanEllisProblems. Also, I doubt he’ll ever understand it.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Like reading thoughts confined to 140 characters? I'm on Twitter too.

by PPP on Sep 12, 2011 6:51 AM PDT reply actions  

@ryanclassic

That supports other info I found, so I’ll update the post, thanks.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 7:26 AM PDT up reply actions  

im trying to imagaine what fake meg would say..but im coming up empty

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 7:51 AM PDT up reply actions  

It’s hard to be more inane and stupid than my real tweets.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 7:53 AM PDT up reply actions  

what chandler wants…chandler gets…except decent attire apparently

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 8:54 AM PDT up reply actions  

Second Tweet:

Just got my @fakespadeinvictorhell account up everyone follow, that means you @burnzie88 #best #friend ‘inserts picture of cat’

Dump and chase

by cmatthew35 on Sep 12, 2011 9:11 AM PDT up reply actions  

@FakeMegalodonBOC

@chandlercat doesn’t like the teal bowtie I got him. Says a yellow one would bring out his eyes. #pickykitty

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions  

@FakeMegalodonBOC

No more treats for @chandlercat until he can correctly use “whom” in a sentence! #backtoschool

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

My other cat is a griffin.

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 11:45 AM PDT up reply actions  

you asshole…i was one of the few who knew it was you all along…how dare u take that away from me puto!!!

well i still know your gay…oh shit did i let that slip?

damn u to hell!!!!

why did remove the curtain so to speak?

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 6:59 AM PDT reply actions  

Color me shocked at this revelation! I didn’t know meg was that funny!

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 10:35 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

I was guessing that it was either Meg or Rudy because the account followed them.

Leslie Knope: "...but it has a lot of heart."
April Ludgate: "That's what people always say when something sucks."
Fear The Fin's Fifth-String Moderator !!

by idunno723 on Sep 12, 2011 3:28 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

[shaking fist angrily] Meggggaalllodonn!!

Actually, I’m kind of proud the FDE account came from one you guys. Don’t get be wrong, I still hate you, but dammit, I respect you.

"I'm not a lady. I'm a DUCK!" - Connie Moreau, D2: Mighty Ducks
Managing Editor - Anaheim Calling

by Jen Neale on Sep 12, 2011 7:15 AM PDT via iPhone app reply actions  

Now there is no point in me creating the @fakemaximafinogenov account. Like there was one before.

"I could have conquered Europe, all of it, but I had women in my life." - King Henry II of England

by Calvert on Sep 12, 2011 7:17 AM PDT reply actions  

Escrow relief heroes!

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 7:37 AM PDT up reply actions  

Who would have benefited most from buying a t-shirt? I need to know whether or not I should regret not buying one.

by RedOscar on Sep 12, 2011 8:53 AM PDT up reply actions  

true story..ive met meg twice and both times he wore a blog inspired shirt

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 8:55 AM PDT up reply actions  

...

"Playin hurt, baby that don't faze me. I don't got time for pain. The only pain I've got time for is the pain I put on fools who don't know what time it is!"

by Semi_Colon on Sep 12, 2011 9:08 AM PDT up reply actions  

Dr. McNinja isn’t a blog, it’s a web-comic. Get your facts straight!

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions  

Dr. McNinja

im not sure what this is..but im so onboard

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 11:19 AM PDT up reply actions  

One of the shirts you saw me wearing was a Dr. McNinja shirt. Others can be found here.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:20 AM PDT up reply actions  

i regonize the hi five one

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions  

im buying this one when i get paid

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions  

#NuclearRhinoProblems

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions  

There are few things worse than wearing blog t-shirts to meet someone you know only from the internet.

Wearing a web-comic shirt is one of those things.

by RedOscar on Sep 12, 2011 3:54 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

I wasn’t wearing those t-shirts because I was meeting spade, I was wearing them because they are awesome.

If you don’t like Dr. McNinja then that’s your problem, Man Who Hates Fun.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 3:55 PM PDT up reply actions  

I’m an engineer, so of course I hate fun. It’s genetically coded or something.

by RedOscar on Sep 12, 2011 4:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

hey now the engineers i work with are all drunks…they have fun

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 13, 2011 5:35 AM PDT up reply actions  

Engineers do not have fun. They just get more ridiculously nerdy to the point that they become entertaining as opposed to dorky.

by RedOscar on Sep 14, 2011 12:49 AM PDT up reply actions  

they do seemed to get obsessed with things…like one guy wont shut up about boats…another loves cricket waaaay too much..but maybe thats cuz hes indian

"A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 14, 2011 5:03 AM PDT up reply actions  

wasn’t wearing those t-shirts because I was meeting spade,

dont be coy meg…you were wearing it cuz you thought it would impress me…for the record it didnt

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 13, 2011 5:34 AM PDT up reply actions  

The money would have gone to the “Fake Dan Ellis Escrow Relief Fund,” AKA my wallet.

The store is still open, if you want one!

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:09 AM PDT up reply actions  

So we have to wait like 9 more months before you reveal that you’re also Albert K? Fuck you, Barstool!

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 7:26 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Is there a way to just convert @FakeDanEllis into @FakeIlyaBryzgalov and take all those followers on a new chapter of goalie insanity?

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 7:38 AM PDT reply actions  

Fakebryzgoalie?

First tweet after the Flyers get scored on

WHY YOU HEFF TO BE BAD MESZAROS?

Hell on Ice/In Lou We Trust/Twitter
That's it. I'm sending you to El Paso to live with your real parents.

by Kevin Sellathamby on Sep 12, 2011 7:39 AM PDT up reply actions  

Dog crossing street. #IlyaBryzgalovProblems

I better get credit next year! :)

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 7:44 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Tweeting from multiple accounts is tiring! #FakeDanEllisProblems

:)

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 7:47 AM PDT up reply actions  

You couldn’t do a FakeBryzgalov account that was funnier than Bryz’s real account.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 7:49 AM PDT up reply actions  

At this point, sure, but I’m sure the Flyers have some sort of Dry Island program when it comes to tweeting, too.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 7:50 AM PDT up reply actions  

One day later, my prophesy turns true!

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 13, 2011 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions  

Impressive...

Earlier today, didn’t you predict that Kneemu’s announcing his return tomorrow? :)

It is that thing that I sent to you.

by whine_country on Sep 13, 2011 10:29 PM PDT up reply actions  

Sleek, you are so money!

by meetyourmako on Sep 14, 2011 11:59 AM PDT up reply actions  

Not Fake Dan Ellis… aww man.

Also, I always thought Fake Dan Ellis was Rudy’s doing rather than yours Meg

Hell on Ice/In Lou We Trust/Twitter
That's it. I'm sending you to El Paso to live with your real parents.

by Kevin Sellathamby on Sep 12, 2011 7:38 AM PDT reply actions  

I always thought Fake Dan Ellis was Rudy’s doing rather than yours Meg

You son of a bitch.

Rudy came up with a couple of them.

“I spilled au jus on my cummerbund” was his.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 7:43 AM PDT up reply actions  

Wasn’t that one yours? It’s my favorite.

If I had done it, Ellis would have been a lot meaner to Jeeves. Also, I would have quit after like 2 weeks. I’m not nearly insane dedicated enough to do this for a whole year.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 7:48 AM PDT up reply actions  

No the au jus one was yours, I’m almost positive.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 7:50 AM PDT up reply actions  

My favorite Dan Ellis thing was that he actually had multiple butlers and he called all of them Jeeves. I was never sure but I like to imagine that he thought they were all the same person, despite one being white, one being black, one being a woman, etc.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 10:06 AM PDT up reply actions  

it was strange no one got susupicous when fake dan ellis started posting at Boc

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 10:47 AM PDT up reply actions  

for all the grammar debates and reading topics are commentors extensivily argue and make great thoughtful points on…yea they didnt catch that…

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 11:20 AM PDT up reply actions  

Another clue: I was by far the best at “#BrodieBrazilProblems” during the brief time that existed.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:27 AM PDT up reply actions  

Nonsense.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions  

Or, you know, when Meg wrote a fucking post interviewing Fake Dan Ellis.

I thought it was you who did that, Rudy!

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 12:26 PM PDT up reply actions  

I still think rudy is albert K..its when rudy drunk on patron he logs in and has fun with us

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions  

I thought it was you who did that, Rudy!

It’s funny because I offered to post that to throw people off, but Meg didn’t think it was necessary… so then he posts it and everyone thinks I had him post it to throw people off.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 12:31 PM PDT up reply actions  

Honestly, I never gave any thought to who @fakedanellis was. Until I meet you, you all fall into the broad category of “faceless assholes on the internet.”

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 12:49 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

That one was my favorite, too. A friend of mine actually came up with that one.

“One of my pet peacocks is sick” was when I realized I may have stumbled on to something special.

“These foie gras Hot Pockets taste terrible” makes me laugh every time I think of it.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:12 AM PDT up reply actions  

One more gone from the hockey community. What a terrible summer!

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 11:15 AM PDT reply actions  

That guy Galimov succumbed to his injuries today.

by meetyourmako on Sep 12, 2011 11:17 AM PDT up reply actions  

Sad day for hockey

I’m pretty stunned Rudy wasn’t the guy behind this

The more you drink, the less gruesome I look.
Writing and inciting at Barca Blaugranes
Troll @shadowking011

by Paul Udani on Sep 12, 2011 11:27 AM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Everybody needs to stop saying that.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 11:29 AM PDT up reply actions  

They clearly think Rudy is hilarious.

GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)

by Angy on Sep 13, 2011 11:16 AM PDT up reply actions  

To be fair, it was witty & hilarious so I can understand why people thought it was me.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 11:35 AM PDT up reply actions  

It obviously wasn’t me — I can barely manage to keep one twitter account going.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions  

Also, it never posted any comics

"Playin hurt, baby that don't faze me. I don't got time for pain. The only pain I've got time for is the pain I put on fools who don't know what time it is!"

by Semi_Colon on Sep 12, 2011 11:46 AM PDT up reply actions  

Dude – brilliant. This was for sure one of my favorite Twitter accounts of all time, and one of the few that I kept checking on regularly to see if I missed anything. That was as funny as hell, even months after Ellis ceased to be relevant.

Fear the Fin - where Russians are underappreciated.

by Ivano M on Sep 12, 2011 12:10 PM PDT reply actions  

Wait Dan Ellis is fake? Who is the guy masquerading as the Ducks mediocre back up, then?!

For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.

by Nut on Sep 12, 2011 2:56 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

(insert current or ex-shark goalies here)

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 12, 2011 3:19 PM PDT up reply actions  

Holy crap

I had no idea Megs was behind FDE. Well done, fellow fin fan.

Fear The Fin = Man goes into cage... Cage goes into salsa... Shark's in the salsa... Our shark.

by Mr. K. on Sep 12, 2011 3:24 PM PDT reply actions  

No congratulations for the Ducks blogger who had to keep it a secret? :)

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 3:58 PM PDT up reply actions  

I've had to keep in secret for a few days

because I managed to read the post when it was originally posted before being taken down.

Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn

by PNK on Sep 12, 2011 4:15 PM PDT up reply actions  

Thanks for keeping quiet.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 12, 2011 4:29 PM PDT up reply actions  

Also, good work!

Loved @FakeDanEllis, didn’t ever really get stale, was just nice to see a chirp every now and again. You didn’t over do it.

The other day i was thinking about it and used @KFUCKINGP as a comparison, which I felt got old fast. Not quite the same thing, but you get what i mean.

Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn

by PNK on Sep 12, 2011 5:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

Nice work!

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 4:35 PM PDT up reply actions  

Hey! Same here.

GO SHARKS!
Ever get the feeling we are on a collision course with reality?
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" -- Benjamin Franklin (see profile for more info on this quote)

by Angy on Sep 13, 2011 11:17 AM PDT up reply actions  

(shrugs) Ok, why not? Congrats, Sleekster.

Fear The Fin = Man goes into cage... Cage goes into salsa... Shark's in the salsa... Our shark.

by Mr. K. on Sep 12, 2011 7:51 PM PDT up reply actions  

Thanks, but nobody I know really knows how Fake Dan Ellis (or the real Dan Ellis) is anyways. :)

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 9:37 PM PDT up reply actions  

I mean “knows who” they are.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 12, 2011 9:38 PM PDT up reply actions  

Good work Meg

Too bad it had to end, I loved it

"You can't stop him, you can only hope to contain Kent Huskins!" - Randy Hahn 2/13/11
I'm on the tweets

by pooponastick on Sep 12, 2011 3:48 PM PDT reply actions  

Those tweets were comedy glod. I'll even try.

FakeDonCherry: Teemo Selami, something like that, scored 6 goals. But did you see Parros fight and grind, a good old canadien boy, the real hero of the game.

I'm warning you! I have ADHD and I know how to use it!!!
Good job Giants, now win 3 more world series titles and then you just might be worthy of being mentioned in the same league as the A's.
THAT IS NABOKOV IN NET NOT NITTYMAKISHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!
San Jose: Being Kept save from ferocious enemies by the Sharks and Earthquakes since 91 and 96.

by Diamondback15 on Sep 12, 2011 5:30 PM PDT reply actions  

This ref doing the OAK-DEN game is my favorite ref. I wish he did hockey.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 7:53 PM PDT reply actions  

oh yea that guy cracks me up everytime

that southern drawl and big nostrils are hilarious

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 13, 2011 5:37 AM PDT up reply actions  

How many of those can you get?

"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.

by tu madre on Sep 12, 2011 8:44 PM PDT reply actions  

What I sent you? I don’t know, I assume however many.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 9:00 PM PDT up reply actions  

hahaha ya

How many have been issued? I think I feel privileged.

"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.

by tu madre on Sep 12, 2011 9:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

I sent one to Meg calling him a douche once but otherwise I think you’re it!

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 12, 2011 9:35 PM PDT up reply actions  

Agreed!

I don’t care what my friends and everyone else says – I think you’re funny!

by Khaaz on Sep 12, 2011 11:48 PM PDT up reply actions  

welcome to my life…your a minority!!!

"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 13, 2011 5:38 AM PDT up reply actions  

Fake Dan Ellis and a lot of other similarly stupid/silly shit has gotten me pretty close to joining Twitter. I still haven’t, only because I feel like its kinda pointless if you don’t have something to broadcast. But I’ve thought about it!

Very nicely done, Meg.

http://sacrificethebody.blogspot.com/
Sacrifice the Body - Examining the NHL through statistical analysis, reasoned thought, and blind conjecture.

by IAmJoe on Sep 13, 2011 1:00 AM PDT reply actions  

Hah, I was wondering who started it. I figured it was a Predators fan, but didn’t really look into it. We had fun blowing the real Dan Ellis up in Game 1 vs the Ducks.

by DonBorvio on Sep 13, 2011 2:13 AM PDT reply actions  

May vertigo find its way to your team’s doorstep someday. :)

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 13, 2011 6:38 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Big deal, you scored a bunch of goals on Dan Ellis. Welcome to the club: it’s called Everybody.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 11:29 AM PDT up reply actions  

He likes to think of it as philanthropy.

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 13, 2011 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

i wish that wasnt so funny but it is…sad at the same time

"A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop"
www.battleofcali.com

by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 13, 2011 12:02 PM PDT up reply actions  

Well, not Everybody. Ellis didn’t yield multiple goals to the Sharks or Kings in any of the three games he appeared against them last year.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 13, 2011 12:12 PM PDT up reply actions  

How terribly inaccurate of me. It’s almost like I didn’t research it at all, but instead I was just trying to mock Dan Ellis!

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions  

Gotcha — it just sort of compelled me to remind folks that Ellis did very well for the Ducks last year.

www.battleofcali.com

by Earl Sleek on Sep 13, 2011 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions  

He is an extremely adequate goaltender. I followed him closely all season, and was annoyed by how often he played well. It made the jokes harder.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 2:11 PM PDT up reply actions  

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 13, 2011 2:16 PM PDT up reply actions  

I was sure it was you. I kept finding faults with the grammar.

In Dinglebarn We Trust -- JftC

by Niesy on Sep 13, 2011 10:36 AM PDT reply actions  

(Read: you suck!)

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 13, 2011 10:38 AM PDT up reply actions  

You’re probably just unaccustomed to the way rich people talk. I’m not surprised.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 11:21 AM PDT up reply actions  

Why did you stop again? Another lawsuit threat?

by ScottyKnows on Sep 13, 2011 10:38 AM PDT reply actions  

I need to free up more time to argue about burritos.

Also I got bored.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 11:21 AM PDT up reply actions  

You can use that excuse for anything!

by ScottyKnows on Sep 13, 2011 2:22 PM PDT up reply actions  

Then I’ll use it now, for why I cannot finish thi

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 13, 2011 2:28 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Is it just me

or does he look French in that photo?

Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn

by PNK on Sep 13, 2011 3:59 PM PDT reply actions  

Meg, you rock for keeping it going this long. Sad to see it end.

I hope you will make up for it with extra laffs here at BoC.

It is that thing that I sent to you.

by whine_country on Sep 13, 2011 10:30 PM PDT reply actions  

Outlook doubtful, but I’ll do my best.

Thanks.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 14, 2011 7:04 AM PDT up reply actions  

It is that thing that I sent to you.

by whine_country on Sep 14, 2011 8:27 AM PDT up reply actions  

Kept me laughing even after the joke got stale. But in my own mind, I prefer to read the headline:

Fake Dan Ellis killed in freak ballooning accident.

by meetyourmako on Sep 14, 2011 12:04 PM PDT up reply actions  

I think that was the original idea but then the whole Russia plane crash thing and… yeah…

The West Coast is the Best Coast.

by RudyKelly on Sep 14, 2011 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions  

I am such an insensitive asshole.

by meetyourmako on Sep 14, 2011 1:52 PM PDT up reply actions  

Maybe they should’ve taken a locomotive. Too soon?

by ScottyKnows on Sep 14, 2011 2:21 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

REPLY HAZY, TRY AGAIN

by meetyourmako on Sep 14, 2011 4:07 PM PDT up reply actions  

This hot air balloon is too noisy. #DanEllisProblems

That was the final tweet I originally had planned. Special bonus to blog comment readers.

Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California

by Megalodon on Sep 14, 2011 9:17 PM PDT up reply actions  

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