The Top 5 Ilya Bryzgalov Tweets
Why are Russians so good at Twitter?
We've already covered the genius that is Alex Ovechkin's Twitter account, but in recent weeks another player from that ice-bound nation has rocketed to the top of the hockey Twitter world: Ilya Bryzgalov.
Those of us who have known and loved Ilya since his time in California aren't surprised that he's a funny guy, but even his famous interviews couldn't prepare us for the comedy gold he is tweeting on a regular basis.
As with Ovechkin, the language barrier often makes it difficult to know if Bryzgalov is being serious or is intentionally joking with these tweets - and that ambiguity makes them all the funnier.
The Top Five Best Ilya Bryzgalov Tweets (so far)
#5 - Hi Guys
Ilya's first-ever tweet was a strong one, packing three exclamation points and making his own last name a hashtag. Everything becomes extra-charming when you realize that Ilya hasn't ever changed the default font, colors, or wallpaper for his Twitter account. Clearly he's far too busy looking at historical chairs to be bothered with all that. Speaking of which...
#4 - Betsy Ross Chair
Ilya's trip to the Betsy Ross House was one of the best things to ever happen in the history of the world. He tweeted repeatedly during his visit (shouldn't he have been paying attention?), and shared several pictures with us, including this one of "Betsy Ross chair."
Seriously, say this tweet out loud with Ilya's accent and try not to smile. "This is Betsy Ross chair." Now think about him out with his kids, getting out his iPhone and snapping a picture of this chair to send out to the world...it's magical.
#3 - The Amazing Dog
(for the non-Twitter savvy, remember to read the bottom tweet first)
I'm not sure what the deal is with the ")))" here. I think it's a Russian thing. He does it a lot, and it seems to indicate laughter or something.
Ilya was seriously blown away by this dog. If anyone ever needs to distract him during a playoff game they should just hold up a picture of a dog crossing the street and Bryzgalov will lose his mind.
#2 - High Hills
Bryzgalov has all sorts of adventures.
After Ilya retires, someone needs to give him a travel TV show where he goes around to famous historical places, takes pictures, and comments on stuff. I'm not joking - I would never miss an episode.
Rudy and I already did some brainstorming for "Bryz's Vacations" on Twitter:
This how Liberty Bell get crack America. #bryztweets
This Golden Gate bridge. Very nice must be expensive #bryztweets
Blanket Washington use Valley Forge #bryztweets
#1 - Brake Time
Never stop tweeting, you crazy Russian bastard.
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An excellent summation of an excellent twitter legacy. Go get ’em, Bryz!
May have to do this with Bobkov at some point. I favorited one tweet that said (from memory): “How sic is this ape movie #awesome”. I really should have inserted one extra (sic) but I didn’t want to be redundant. :)
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Sep 9, 2011 6:05 AM PDT via mobile reply actions 1 recs
I would honestly love to see nothing more than a Lubomir Visnovsky twitter account. I am sure it would be nothing but a ball.
Literally just a picture of a ball. Or balls.
“We’re looking at balls.”
Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California
Are those balls?
because last time we were here, those were balls.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
by PNK on Sep 9, 2011 7:49 AM PDT up reply actions
hahaha
hell ya, I’d sit all over that chair!
"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.
by tu madre on Sep 10, 2011 9:15 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
why does that sound dirty?
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
I hope he tweets to a troll account “why you heff to be mad?”
Hell on Ice/In Lou We Trust/Twitter
That's it. I'm sending you to El Paso to live with your real parents.
by Kevin Sellathamby on Sep 9, 2011 9:05 AM PDT reply actions
oh, and i forgot this
Why are Russians so good at Twitter?
;)
Мы в любовь играли,
И как кровь из вены капает слеза.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP BABY!!!!
Yes “))))))” it’s for laughter. Must be a Russian thing because my cousin does it all the time. Maybe you can’t see the smily’s eyes because of the Russian fur hat? Iono….
The one about the Park was hilarious.
by ScottyKnows on Sep 9, 2011 11:13 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
They released the duckie rookie camp roster. I so want Igor Bobkov to make the club for his name alone.
Is it I*gor or Ee*gor? Does he have a hump? and Bobkov is just funny to say. I love this guy already and haven’t even seen him play or a picture of him.
Let's go Ducks.
You earned a lot of points! Unfortunately, you lost them all because you said, “LOL.”
by RudyKelly on Sep 9, 2011 3:49 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
My grandfather invented the Cobb salad.
Proud member of the "Bring Back Semenov" Club
"The only crying allowed in hockey is when you lose a playoff series, retire or JR is speaking publicly." - Jamie Baker
"You are down with the homies, my friend." - Randy Hahn
If we all cared as much as Kent Huskins the world would be a better place.
"Don't fart on my chair mutha fuckah!" - Randy Hahn
by PNK on Sep 9, 2011 3:57 PM PDT up reply actions
He was Russia’s goalie at the WJC. I think he got replaced after a poor start but did finish the tourney vs Canada. He’s alright I guess. I don’t get too excited about prospects since there’s no telling where they’ll be in a few years.
im off to vegas….gonna put 5k down the sharks get bounced out of the playoffs in round 1….easy money!!!
i miss bryz…
"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 9, 2011 4:32 PM PDT reply actions
the guys at the wheel usually say that…its why i dont go to the wheel…that and the wheel sux
craps and 3 card
"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 9, 2011 5:10 PM PDT up reply actions
per corey perry-puckdaddy interview
It’s so realistic. To play the game as myself, it shows everything that I do on the ice. The new feature — the full contact physics engine — guys are bigger, pushing smaller guys around. Everybody doesn’t have the same strength. And if you skate by the goalie, you can clip his knee and he’ll fall down and you’ll have an open net.
haha
"A Chortled Evils Nip"
www.battleofcali.com
by SPADE-IN-VICTORHELL on Sep 9, 2011 4:37 PM PDT reply actions
In Soviet Russia... nah
Bryzgalov still stinks in the playoffs… Must be a Russian thing…
The more you drink, the less gruesome I look.
Writing and inciting at Barca Blaugranes
Troll @shadowking011
For the Yotes maybe but he was pretty damn solid for the Ducks, with Philly’s defense he should do great…why u haff to be mad? Maybe if Pheonix didn’t ride him so hard for 70 games a season he’d have something left in the tank for a cup run, I think Philly will be smarter with him.
They’re paying him 10 million next season. Even if he’s better rested, not sure that’s too smart.
www.battleofcali.com
by Earl Sleek on Sep 10, 2011 7:26 AM PDT via mobile up reply actions
I was pissed about that series because I watched it and thought, “Cool, now everyone will finally notice that Keith Yandle sucks at defense,” but everyone just blamed Bryz.
So’s Ehrhoff…I’d wager Ilya is worth it a bit more…
"Thank you very much fans and let’s go for the next game together!"
— Lubomir Visnovsky
I rec’d that shit.
by Steven Hida on Sep 11, 2011 12:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Bryzgalov tweets are so Ellis(gold)!
"There is no gravity son, the world just sucks." - my father.
by tu madre on Sep 10, 2011 9:18 AM PDT reply actions 4 recs
God damn, last minute addition to this post!
From @bryzgoalie30 today:
Anyone no something about Crystal skulls, is it a real deal?
Is it real you guys? Cause I just bought like 20.
Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California
by Megalodon on Sep 10, 2011 7:45 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I get the feeling this won’t be the last addition — is this about Indiana Jones?
www.battleofcali.com
Well the thing in Indiana Jones is based on a real historical mystery/urban legend thing, so I suspect Ilya may have seen something on the History channel mentioning them.
He seems like the kind of guy who watches the History channel a lot.
Owen Nolan saw my cat.
Battle of California
Indiana Jones IV, Star Wars Episodes I-III
George Lucas giveth and he taketh away.
by meetyourmako on Sep 11, 2011 1:49 AM PDT up reply actions
When Patrick Marleau says he’s on Twitter, he means he uses messenger pigeons. #poop
by meetyourmako on Sep 11, 2011 2:49 PM PDT up reply actions

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