Close to a year ago, Michal Rozsival found himself in the worst spot in the world. Arizona. But he was playing in the NHL's Western Conference Finals. Unfortunately, he was then brutally not hurt badly at all in a collision with Dustin Brown, and watched the Phoenix Coyotes fall to the Los Angeles Kings in overtime of game five, thus ending his season and chance at a Stanley Cup for the year. It turns out Rozsival had a thigh bruise. Yes, despite the assistance needed to leave the ice and writhing around, it was just a bruise. Obviously, these can be painful, but it went down as a darker moment for Rozsival as about 60 seconds later Dustin Penner scored the game winner.
Rozsival could only look on a short while later when Dustin Brown skated around Los Angeles with the Stanley Cup, and then had to come to terms that later on this year Brown had landed a role in the critically acclaimed Las Aventuras de Alec. Life just isn't fair sometimes, and for Rozsival he was getting hit pretty hard. But now's his chance. Rozsival is in a moderately better area that at least has bodies of water (though really lame ones), and is playing once more for a trip to the Finals.
We already have gone over the travesties against man that Dustin Brown has committed, but now comes the time for Rozsival to strike back. I mean of course that he is going to seriously not injure Dustin Brown in any way, shape, or form. He may try to make a run or two at him, but seriously, he has no chance. What are you? Stupid? It's Michal Rozsival. He was laid the fuck out by a high leg hit. I mean, even soccer players bounce back from that sort of shit. Way to rally the team. I'm pretty sure that's half the reason the Coyotes lost. "Oh shit, if something that pathetic can bring one of us down, let's just roll over and die." At least he has been playing well this year. Good for him!
But expect this story to be brought up at least five times by NBC. That and Jamie Kompon coaching against his former employers. He has to be feeling bitter about being fired from the Kings. Looks like that three goal power play in the deciding game last year didn't save him from a year long artful display of ineptitude during a man advantage (not sexual). But maybe he carried that momentum over from game six...
I still don't know how a team with Chicago's talent can have such a terrible power play.— Corey Sznajder (@ShutdownLine) May 30, 2013
...Or maybe not.
Chicago, on paper at least, is very impressive. They showed as much throughout the regular season. Their second round performance however had them looking vulnerable. Detroit came within one goal to defeat them, and were up 3-1 in the series before the Blackhawks rallied. The Kings have looked far from dominant this post-season also, and really need to be on their game if they want to put up a fight. Jarret Stoll possibly returning would be a huge boost, though Jonathan Quick being on his A game yet again will probably be the difference maker. If he isn't, this could be a short series. Anze Kopitar getting things going again would also be nice.
Prediction: Chicago fans get all whiny about this post making fun of lakes also. They don't even notice that the Blackhawks win after the Kings come out looking lethargic since it's a weekend day game. Boo-hoo.