What the Olympic Rosters should look like or oh my God the offseason is so long

This offseason is taking forever and while something interesting things have happened (namely, San Jose finally becoming self-aware and naming their arena the SAP Center) I'm bored and miss hockey so I decided to draw up some Olympic rosters. Without further adieu:





Milan Lucic Sidney Crosby Claude Giroux
Steven Stamkos Ryan Getzlaf Corey Perry
John Tavares Joe Thornton Jeff Carter
Jamie Benn Patrice Bergeron Rick Nash
Duncan Keith Shea Weber
Marc-Eduard Vlasic Drew Doughty
Brent Seabrook Alex Pietrangelo

Mike Smith
Carey Price
Roberto Luongo

Extra: P.K. Subban

Taylor Hall

Since it's on Olympic ice I can see Hall instead of Lucic, but they are a little short on toughness without him. PK Subban should be in the top six but it wouldn't make sense to have him on his off side with another offensive defenseman and Doughty, Pietrangelo, and Keith are all better than he is. In all likelihood Vlasic won't make it, but I think he should. Kris Letang is too one dimensional for this team. Toews plays the same role as Bergeron but Bergeron is better. He'll probably make the team over Thornton but that's stupid. Fuck him.




Zach Parise Alex Galchenyuk Bobby Ryan
James Van Reimsdyk Ryan Kesler David Backes
Dustin Brown Paul Stastny Patrick Kane
Max Pacioretty Joe Pavelski Ryan Callahan
Ryan Suter Dustin Byfuglien
Ryan McDonaugh John Carlson
Brooks Orpik Jacob Trouba
Jonathan Quick
Jimmy Howard
Cory Schneider
Extra: Phil Kessel
Zach Bogosian

Phil Kessel won't be the extra forward on the actual team, but I can't find a wing I'd rather have him in there for. Maybe the real team will have Backes at center over Stastny or Galchenyuk. I know Galchenyuk is only going to be in his second year and the likelihood of him making it is slim, but he is a center team USA has been missing for a while (big, offensively skilled guy) and I think he'll be good next year, so I have him in there. Likewise, Trouba probably won't make the team but I wanted another guy with offensive skill for the third pairing and I think he's going to be awesome pretty quickly.




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Daniel Sedin Henrik Sedin Daniel Alfreddson
Gabriel Landeskog Henrik Zetterberg Patrick Hornqvist
Johan Franzen Nicklas Backstrom Loui Eriksson
Alex Steen Patrick Berglund Jakob Silfverberg
Oliver Ekman-Larsson Niklas Kronwall
Erik Karlsson Alex Edler
Jonas Brodin Nicklas Hjalmarsson
Henrik Lundqvist
Viktor Fasth
Jacob Markstrom


Magnus Pajaarvi

Gustav Nyquist

Daniel Alfreddson most likely will play with Zetterberg after playing half the year with him on the Red Wings, but he fits in really well with the Sedin's style of play. Sweden is going to be tough, they've got a ton of skill up front that'll be harder to stop on big ice, an awesome group of well rounded defensemen, and Lundqvist in goal. Hopefully the Finns take them out.




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Alexander Ovechkin Evgeni Malkin Ilya Kovalchuk
Nail Yakupov Pavel Datsyuk Alexander Semin
Nikolai Kulemin Artem Anisimov Vladimir Tarasenko
Alexander Burmistrov Andrei Loktionov Mikhail Grigoenko
Dimitri Kulikov Slava Voynov
Anton Volchenkov Andrei Markov
Nikita Nikitin Fedor Tyutin
Sergei Bobrovsky
Semyon Varlamov
Evgeni Nabakov
Sergei Gonchar
Yevgeni Kuznetsov

Russia's forwards can be pretty scary but they have probably the weakest defense goalies of the top 4 contenders. It's on their ice so that can either play into their favor (used to playing on big ice) or against (crushed under the pressure). Gonchar will probably be on the team but I think he past his expiration date a season ago. I think the Russians are the weakest of the Top 4. It'll be hilarious when Slovenia beats them.

Well that was fun. Did you know it's not even August yet? It's weird, when I was a kid I summer went by so fast and the school year took forever, and now it's inversed. October 3rd is so far away :(

This FanPost was posted by a fan, and it probably sucks and is dumb.

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