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Kings Gameday: A Few Questions

LA Kings (Still not good) @ New Jersey Devils (28-20-3, 6th in Eastern Conference)

4:00 PST, FSN West

Where the hell is Ted Purcell?

Okay, so they bring him up for a few games and he plays well, they send him back down and he's the star of the All-Star Game... and then they keep him down so Brian Willise can play? I hope there's some ulterior motive to this (like a trade), otherwise I'm going to pull a Michael Douglas in Falling Down and make them call up Purcell at gunpoint. (Maybe get some breakfast too.)

Would you trade Brad Stuart?

I'm pretty sure Blake and Nagy are both gone, but I'm not sure about Brad Stuart. On the plus side, he plays fairly good defense and, along with Frolov, has given us a 2nd power play unit that can do some damage. On the minus side, he gives up the puck at the worst possible time; also, he has bleach blonde hair. (What is this, 1999?) I'm not sure. If we could sign him to a longer deal for less money then he's making now, I'd do it. If he's going to want $3.5 million again next year or even more, then I say we trade him.

Where the hell is Mike Cammalleri?

Okay, so he hurt his ribs in a "fight" (read: slap contest) on December 26th. I haven't heard shit about him since. Where the hell is he? One of my crazy friends thinks Cammy is delaying his return on purpose to get back at the team for winning his arbitration hearing. My crazy friend ate paint chips as a kid, I think. Come to think of it...

Where the hell is Ladislav Nagy, too?

He's been on the IR since January 19th with a sore neck. What the fuck? This isn't football, asshole, your neck can be sore when it's broken. Why does he need to turn his neck anyway, so he can watch the other team take his errant pass down to score? What the hell, people?

This isn't a question, but...

When I was 13, I was playing in a hockey tournament. The other team had a power play and their point man took a shot that I couldn't see because I was screened. The guy in front of me jumped out of the way right when the shot was taken and I saw the puck coming right at my head. I ducked, instinctively, and the puck went in. My coach was furious and went off on me after the game, telling me my job was to stop the puck and if I wasn't going to do it then he'd find someone who will. To this day, my dad won't let me forget about it.

I was 13.

Prediction: As noted earlier by our excellent guest columnist, the Devils are missing Jay Pandolfo and have been struggling to score recently. They do, however, have Martin Brodeur. Still, I think the Kings win with their newfound defensive play, 3-2. Goals by Brown, Armstrong, and Stuart.