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Rudy Kelly's Home for Wayward Teams: The Greatest Name Ever

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So, there's a sad story about this kid that was abducted from his Swedish mom by his Chinese dad.  Apparently the dad lost custody of the kid and then split with him during his last visit.  There's a website about it here.  But that's not the important part; the important part is the kid's name.  It is the greatest name in human history.  You ready?  Make sure you're not drinking anything and you've removed your monocle before you read this name.  And remember, the kid's mom is Swedish and his dad is Chinese.  OK, here it is:

Thor Wang.

Or, as it should be written to give an appropriate level of awesomeness: Thor Wang!  Holy fuck.  I wish my name was Thor Wang.  Can you imagine how cool you would be just by having that name?  I'm pretty sure you're given a Medal of Honor at 3, because why wait until you single-handedly destroy a platoon with only a hammer and your magic to give it to you?  Can you imagine this little kid on a playground, chillin' with his ball, and then some kid takes it from him?

"Release the orb, peasant, lest you face the wrath... the wrath of Thor Wang!"

I imagine this kid is going to grow up to be a cross of the Norse god of Thunder and the main bad guy from Big Trouble in Little China.

Thor Wang.  I think that beats my previous favorite name ever, Hercules Mulligan.  You can tell I like mythical figure first names and hilariously ethnic last names.