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The Kings Clinic Series

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The Los Angeles Kings are hosting a series of clinics this season to educate and improve their fabase's skills in a variety of areas.  Their first two clinics are the Matt Greene Checking Clinic and the Jarret Stoll Offensive Skills Clinic(Links are .pdf)  I applaud these events.  They're a great method of showing what not to do on the ice.  Who better to show how not to use your body for a check than Matt Greene?  Who better to show how to not close as many offensive chances as possible than Jarret Stoll?  Your intrepid blogger was lucky enough to stumble upon the rest of the self-help seminars being offered this season.  Here they are:

Getting Enough Sleep, hosted by Anze Kopitar

Positioning, hosted by Jonathan Quick

How to Wax Your Eyebrows, hosted by Richard Clune

Never Get Carded!, hosted by Thomas Hickey

Living with a Tiny Penis, hosted by Wayne Simmonds

How to Close a Deal, hosted by Dean Lombardi

Iron Man Training, hosted by Justin Williams CANCELLED

The Art of Smiling, hosted by Michal Handzus

How to Always Get Noticed in Any Situation, hosted by Rob Scuderi

How to be a Giant Douche Bag at All Times, hosted by Jack Johnson (You might get positive instruction at this one)

The Key to Being Gorgeous, hosted by Ryan Smyth

Understanding Russians, hosted by Terry Murray

Being Un-Awesome, hosted by Bailey