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I Don't Want To Be One Of Those Guys, But...

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One thing that always bothers me one fan message boards, article comments, etc. are when fans claim they could do something better than a pro athlete. Like I'll read someone comment, "I could shoot harder than Scott Niedermayer," and I'll think, 'No you can't, you idiot. Besides, he's not trying to shoot as hard as he can. Oh god why is no one else as smart and pretty as me?!' That's what usually happens. With that being said, though...

I'm about 90% sure I could beat Trent Hunter in a race from goal line to goal line. I'm 99.9% sure I could beat him from goal line to red line. Let's set this up. Give me a few hours to get acclimated to non-goalie skates and I'll be good to go. Let's get Luc out there too, I'm pretty sure that at 45 years old and with 2 left feet he could beat Trent Hunter. C'mon, Trent, you some kinda girl? It's go time! Hyah! (*pulls hamstring typing)

(What I'm trying to say is that guy's slow as shit. As literal shit. Put some skates on shit and give it a little push and I think it'd go about as fast as Hunter does.)