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CHANG and Owen's Excellent Adventure

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Don't miss Earl's Fantasy Hockey Ducks Gameday Below This Post!

If you don't know what the hell is going on here, please read parts 1 and 2.

Owen Nolan has an announcement scheduled for Tuesday night. Some people speculate he's going to announce his formal retirement, but I'm kind of worried he's going to announce that he's suing me for my half of the 19 millions United State dollars that I'm going to get using his name.

I might be in trouble.

Anyways, when I last updated you guys I had just given my information to Mr. Peter CHANG Lee for the second time, including a phone number he could call if he liked listening to a phone ring forever with no one ever answering.

He replied very quickly, obviously as eager as I am to finish this deal. I'm so close to the money now I can taste it.

It tastes like a jet ski.

From Mr. Lee:


This is in acknowledgement of your email,and i also want to use this opportunity to thank you for providing the required details about you,this now shows a level of commitment on your part.I will prefer you provide with your address in California, USA.
I shall give your details to the local solicitor on Monday.Like I said before as soon as I have the documents I shall be sending copies to you for your reading as well as for your file keeps.
That sounds great, Mr. Lee. I like to read stuff and I also like keepsing files.
Like I promised in my email to you, here are some details and facts about The Late Mr. Gerald Nolan,
Oh, how exciting! I'm really looking forward to reading this biography of my fake relative.
he was born on the 8th August 1940 in Mexico but part of his childhood was in Melbourne, Australia and was later married to a British woman for many years before divorcing her, she later died of Ovarian cancer in a London hospital without any children.
Aww, how sad. What a terrible imaginary tragedy!
Gerald was 5 feet 10 and had a bald head. He was a major investor in mines and property and had so many investments all over China and numerous shares in banks and companies. He lived in mainland China for over 20 years before he died and spoke Chinese fluently.

He was a keen sportsman
Oh cool! I wonder what kinds of sports he enjoyed?
and enjoyed playing golf.
Ah. Never mind, that's not cool.

Gerald was a gentleman who worked very hard all his life and would be remembered for his humility and kindness as he had learnt the ways and traditions of the Chinese people.
What a swell guy.

The e-mail continues for a long time, with Mr. Lee letting me know that he's giving me all this info so I'll be ready in case anyone asks any questions about Mr. Gerald Nolan, since for the purposes of our little ruse I'm supposed to be a relative of his.

I don't know about all this, Mr. Lee. I'm not sure if I'm comfortable pretending to be someone I'm not!

Mr. Lee also asks again for my California address and a copy of my identification.

To reassure me that he is trustworthy, Mr. Lee also included a brief biography of himself. Hooray!

About Myself
I have worked at the Hang Seng Bank Ltd for over 2 decades. Before I ventured into banking I taught English in a local school in Beijing as I took an interest in English at an early age. I am married and have 2 children, one 28 years and the other 22 years. I was born on 3rd September 1954 and I have been married for 31 years which sometimes seems to me like yesterday.

Time flies when you're in love, CHANG.
My address is Flat C, 4/Floor, Block 7, Handsome Court, Tuen Mun, New Territories here in Hong Kong but my family lives in Beijing in our family home with my parents.

Handsome Court, what a coincidence! I used to live on Sexy Lane.

I am not a wealthy individual due to the communist economy in China and Hong Kong where everything belong to Government so I have worked and worked all my life with little or nothing to show for it hence I want to take this advantage before I retire next year. I have a very lovely family whom I want to be able to afford a good life after when I retire so I will never do anything to get me or you into any trouble. This is a little about myself but can tell you more if you ask specific details.

Oh yes, I think I will take you up on that offer. I have some questions.

Here is the reply I sent to Mr. Peter CHANG Lee:


Thankyou for the great details about Mr. Gerald Nolan and about yourself. Getting to know you personally is important to me because we are going to be in business togewther and I like to trust people that I am in business together with.

I have my address and I will make a copy of my ID later today. I want to send them to you and I am very excited about this opportunity but in your last e-mail you said you could give me more information about yourself if I asked so I would like to do that first. Trust is very important to me and like you said this is destiny so I want to make sure I know who I am dealing with.

Please answer these qeustions about yourself if you can:

1. What is your sign (zodiac)? Do you believe in the zodiac/astrology in Hong Kong?
2. Are you religious?
3. Do you ever lie?
4. Do you like sports? Which sports?
5. Do you like hockey? Do they play hockey in Hong Kong?
6. Would you ever like to meet in person with me after this deal?

And since you asked for details about me here are some:

I was born in Ireland but grew up in Canada. My birthday is February 12th so it's coming up soon!
I am a sportsman too, but the sports I like are hunting and fishing and hockey. I used to play hockey a lot but had some injuries and now I am retired. Today I own a couple of restaraunts but mostly I get to relax and enjoy my hobbies.

Let me know if you have other questions. I am excited to see your answers to mine.

Thanks you and bless you,

-Owen Buster Nolan

Please, real Owen Nolan, don't be mad.

Don't hunt me.