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Los Angeles Kings Gameday: What's New?

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Hey, would ya look at that. Hockey's back.

Time for Dwight King to kick ass and chew bubblegum
Time for Dwight King to kick ass and chew bubblegum

There's a lot of things that cause stress in today's world. We can be kept up at night worrying about finances. Worrying about our future. Worrying that the cops finally find your boss's corpse. Me? I worry about why Alec Martinez isn't starting. Don't get me wrong, I like Jake Muzzin. I don't like Robyn Regehr, but him not starting isn't changing anytime soon. So why sit one of your top puck moving defensemen, who's at least on par defensively as the guy you are replacing him with? Does Darryl Sutter just not like Martinez? Does he hate Latinos? Does he hate me? But wait! There's more

Dwight King is your Los Angeles Kings top line left winger! Prepare yourself to hear that name a lot. Dwight "MVP" King played himself to the top, and Sutter recognizes a breakout star when he sees it. Sure it means that captain Dustin Brown is relegated to the third line, because newcomer Matt Frattin meshes so damn well Mike Richards and Jeff Carter apparently, but that's how deep the Kings are with Dwight King in the fold. The reduced minutes for Brown means less falling over for penalties, but the extra minutes for Dwight King will offset that. Dwight King also cures cancer, fixes the economy, and is secretly Jesus who killed Hitler. Disagree? FUCK OFF. It's Dwight King!


Dwight King

Next Game

Los Angeles Kings
@ Minnesota Wild

Thursday, Oct 3, 2013, 5:00 PM PDT
Xcel Energy Center

Complete Coverage >

When we last saw the Minnesota Wild, the aforementioned Dustin Brown was viciously hit in the elbow by Jason Pominville's face. Brown missed the next two games, and Pominville was suspended for the remainder of the year, including the playoffs. Expect Dustin Brown to drop the gloves against one of the members of the Wild, though it's highly unlikely it will be Pominville himself. Since he's such a pussy.

The rest of the Kings remain largely unchanged from last year, but without Alec Martinez in the lineup they are unable to generate enough offense.

Prediction: Kings lose 2-1, with the lone goal coming from MVKing. The game gets called at the end of the second period when the ice becomes unusable and the temperature in St. Paul reaches a sweltering 56 degrees.

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