Christmas is in two days, guys. If you still haven't gotten all the presents you need to buy, then you are a horrible, thoughtless person.
Here are the five funniest hockey-related tweets of the past week:
"HO HO HOLY SH-" *stumbles on icy roof* *falls headfirst down chimney* *out indefinitely* RT @wyshynski: #SantaClowes— Spyder 2 Y Banana (@gambit1154) December 16, 2013
Clowe....Clowe....man, why does that name sound familiar?
@TravisSBN I can read articles on sbnation but I don't think anyone can comment. Tell whoever's fixing it to stop, this is great— Rudy Kelly (@rudykelly) December 20, 2013
It truly was a Christmas miracle.
*WARNING EXTREMELY GRAPHIC* The AP has released an alternate angle of the exact moment Dustin Brown knead Tomas Hertl http://t.co/MYBrHrqYCi— PumperNicholl (@PumperNicholl) December 21, 2013
Dustin Brown hates cats twice as much as he hates humans because his hate is based on the number of knees a thing has.
Wilson could have jumped inside Schenn's body and exploded the code like Neo in the Matrix and his teammates would be like, "Seems alright."— Harrison Mooney (@HarrisonMooney) December 18, 2013
"Sometimes you get your code exploded. That's hockey. Gotta keep your head up."
#1 - The Fake Dan Ellis Memorial Tweet of the Week!
Hoo Getzlaf's face is fucked up. Also he has stitches or something.— Winging It In Motown (@wingingitmotown) December 18, 2013
Was @TheNHLHumor funny this week?
You know what? It's the holidays. It's the time of year when we're supposed to be charitable, to forgive others, and to just generally be kind.
In that spirit, I'll give you all the greatest gift I can imagine: I won't share any of NHL Humor's shitty garbage tweets with you this week.
Merry Christmas folks.
@ San Jose Sharks
Monday, Dec 23, 2013, 7:30 PM PST
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Prediction: Fuck Dustin Brown.
Video Gamery: My 46th-favorite video game is Luigi's Mansion. It was great to see Luigi finally have a chance to shine without that asshole Mario stealing all the attention.