San Jose Sharks
@ Anaheim Ducks
Tuesday, Dec 31, 2013, 5:00 PM PST
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Whereas 2013 was all doom and gloom, maybe 2014 won't be so bad. Megalodon will tell you different, but that's because he's a morose motherfucker who no longer has any joy left in his pathetic life.
There's just so many possibilities for 2014! Anything could happen, friends. So here now are the predictions of things I believe will happen in 2014 that will make this year just great!
A Deep Playoff Run
The Ducks learn from last season's loss in 7 games to the exiled Detroit Red Wings, and come back with a hunger that takes them deep in to this year's Stanley Cup Playoffs.
Bear Flag Revolt Redux
A second Bear Flag Rebellion turns our great state back into a great nation unto itself, free from the shackles of the lesser 49 states.
The Rise of Handy Robots
Is 2014 the year of cyborg handjobs? You bet it is.
Party Down Movie?
Even though all signs point to this never ever happening, I say 2014 sees a turn for the best and shit finally starts rolling for the return of our favorite group of struggling actor-caterers.
The Sharks Lose Hertl for the Rest of The Season
Dunn Goes to Rehab
Seriously, you have a problem.
2013-14 Hart Trophy is Awarded to Ryan Getzlaf
Because why wouldn't it?
Pogs Make a Comeback
Fuck yeah they do.
The Majority of US States Will Recognize Same-Sex Marriage
As of right now, 18 states have accepted marriage equality. By the end of 2014, that number will be over 25, making a slight majority of the nation a less hateful place to be.
Team USA Takes Home Gold
I just hope no one gets Hertl.
To help commemorate the Ducks' 20th year this season, each gameday I'll be posting a clip of a classic moment from the team's history against that night's opponent. Here is today's...
Sharks - Ducks brawl 98-99 (via vindiggs)