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Los Angeles Kings Gameday: Hockey Day in parts of America

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A quick rundown of the day's activities.

Jonathan Toews, why can't I quit you?
Jonathan Toews, why can't I quit you?
Jonathan Daniel

Next Game

Los Angeles Kings
@ Chicago Blackhawks

Sunday, Feb 17, 2013, 12:30 PM PST
United Center

Complete Coverage >

Back on the road, so go to Chicago and buy some more Los Angeles Kings tickets.

This is a special day. As in NBC expects hockey fans to tune in loyally for a whopping two (TWO!) games on NBC and another on NBC Sports or Versus or Outdoor Network or Whitey Programming. I guess that is a big deal, except up north where every Saturday is Hockey Night in Canada. Here's some fun activities for today:

  • Get drunk. Obviously.
  • Punch someone. This should come about naturally after a bit of the aforementioned drinking.
  • Yell at your TV for Mike Milbury/Jeremy Roenick to shut the fuck up.
  • Complain that your hockey team isn't playing on Hockey Day in America.
  • Complain that your hockey team is playing on Hockey Day in America and is receiving shitty coverage from NBC.
  • Remember how awful FOX was with their coverage.
  • Curse Gary Bettman's existence.
  • Read Battle of California.
  • Tell Dunn that he fucking sucks.
  • X3misi1_mediumTry and draw up plays but have them all wind up looking like penises.
  • Buy some avocados. Because, like, avocados are delicious and nutritious, man. If we all, like, lived off avocados there wouldn't be wars and stuff.
  • Clean out your bong.
  • Be called a racist for watching hockey and not the NBA All-Star game.
  • Bleach and wash your hood.
  • Play Ingress.
  • Throw and break phone after getting confused with what the hell Ingress is.
  • Look up old former teammates from hockey on Facebook.
  • Get bored with teammates and find photos of female friends from high school to fondle yourself to.
  • Wonder whatever happened to Clive Owen.
  • Play Mario Kart.