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Los Angeles Kings Gameday: WUB WUB WUB BWAAAAAAAH

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Meet Skrillex

More random awards for this guy
More random awards for this guy

I am going to be the first person to admit to being out of touch with dubstep, or techno in general. Sure it may be reclassified as "dance music" or "house" (due to the fact your house violently shakes when you listen to it), but Moby does it so, yeah, it's techno. And one of the most popular...producers(?) is that of Skrill Lex, otherwise known as Twipz. Mr. Lex has won many a Grammy in his brief career as a dubber stepper and performs to arenas full of people who rubba-dub-dub along with him. Now while it is no secret that Killerex does most of his work via a Macbook, he also was once a musician that played an instrument. Yes, before he was Rolex, he was known just as Sonny Moore, aspiring guitarist. Teerex went on to become a lead singer for a band who got to go on the Van's Warped Tour, and played with Atreyu, who I think I have heard of.

Unfortunately for Exlax, his band was called Dear Diary, My Teen Angst Has a Body Count, and he quickly split probably upon hearing what the hell they were named. Still, it was more than that mouse head wearing Canadian guy did. You know, except signing Krillex to a recording contract and then insulting him for being a talentless hack. Still, while deadmau5 was drowning in a giant mouse head filled with his own vomit, Buttsex was busy cranking out albums and making Korn relevant again, so point for vomitmau5 I guess. Professor X also lit his hair on fire to prove how big of a dweeby-ass nerd hardcore he is.

How did this guy ever get bullied out of art school? Okay, honestly I just feel bad for Pokedex. How can you not? He's a pathetic looking pasty guy who was influenced by Mexican punk bands. Now he's classified as brostep, or electrocomplex, or fapstep, or dubya, or tugpop, or whatever. He's as big as your acid and ecstasy laded mind makes him to be. deadmau5? That dude is classified as trance music, which sounds booooooriiiiiiing. Or as he puts it, "no true genre", and we all know that's code for "crap". And what's with the 5? Does that stand for how many old recording guys he had to blow to get a gig? And don't tell me SkrillExxon just mashes buttons on a laptop, because when I do it nothing happens.


See? Nothing. Wait, hold on a second.

Racer-X is working with The Doors and this is all we get? Fuck this guy. Fuck em both. I'm going to go listen to some more Vanilla Ice. He never ripped off anyone.

Next Game

Los Angeles Kings
@ San Jose Sharks

Tuesday, Apr 16, 2013, 7:30 PM PDT
HP Pavilion

Complete Coverage >


The Kings sneaked past the Ducks in their last game, which was a real bipolar affair. Main takeaways, Jake Muzzin has been seeing a diminished role ever since Robyn Regehr displaced him playing alongside Drew Doughty, and the last game kind of highlighted the issues he still has without Drew Doughty helping him out on the defensive end. The power play has been clicking more often, which is a big plus, though 5 on 5 has been less than stellar (at least subjectively) ever since the game against the Coyotes. If the top line of the Kings can maybe convert a few chances, it would be a huge boost.

Right behind Los Angeles in the standings are the Sharks. With two games to play against San Jose, the Kings are in a remarkably similar scenario to last year where they were passed up by San Jose in the standings, and drew the Canucks for the first round. Not that it mattered because, you know, Stanley Cup.

Prediction: The Kings drop the Sharks like Skrillex drops the bass. Or beats. Whatever.