The top 5 pizza toppings and the Sharks player that best represents those toppings:
#5 Extra cheese - Joe Pavelski
Sometimes you forget about how great extra cheese is on a pizza. "I already have some cheese," you might say to yourself, "Why do I need MORE cheese?"
Because, stupid, when you have extra cheese it makes it more difficult for opposing defenders to shut down your team's cheese.
#4 Olives - Patrick Marleau
Some people don't like olives. Some people don't like Patrick Marleau.
You don't want to be one of those kinds of people, do you?
#3 Onions - Dan Boyle
Tangy. Crispy. Pungent. Strong. Sensual. A tingle on your tongue.
Onions. Dan Boyle. One in the same.
#2 Sausage - Brent Burns
Fact: no pizza has ever gotten worse with the inclusion of sausage. Brent Burns is the same way. You can throw him into basically any role on your team, and he'll get the job done.
#1 Pepperoni - Joe Thornton
The best pizza topping is the best Shark. Just like Joe Thornton, Pepperoni makes everything it's involved in better. Throw it on a pizza, a sandwich, or in a Hot Pocket, and you're guaranteed to have a top-quality experience.
Fuck you, cheeseburgers. Fuck you, Kings. It's all about the San Jose Pizzas.
Prediction: Sharks win 4-2, which is also the outcome of the upcoming playoff series.
Video Gamery: My fifth-favorite video game is Bioshock. The original is the best, but they're all good.