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Kings Gameday: Poor Corey

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Times have been rough

Look at this and tell me there's a god
Look at this and tell me there's a god
Jeff Gross

Corey Perry has had a decent playoff run so far this postseason. In terms of production, that is. The rest of the time, well...

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It's a pretty apt summary of how things have gone. Step 1. Be an annoying turd. Step 2. Get the shit beat out of you. It's a simple system, and there has been no shortage of examples.

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And, well, sometimes bad things just happen to bad people.

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Sometimes things go too far. But really, I don't think anyone particularly cares.

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Good thing he would never do that!

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Whoops.

Things haven't turned around too much for Corey Perry against L.A. now either. Game two was especially brutal.

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Well, at least things couldn't get worse, right?

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All in all, it's left Corey rather upset.

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Hm. Pretty good quality gif there. Really hope that The Roy, Al, and Alf blog keeps up the good work. You have to figure though this is all stemming from the work of one Mr. Megalodon Q. Pennyfeathers. Yes, I speak of the Corey Perry origin stories.

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>One grim and moonless night a bolt of lightning hit a garbage can full of used tissues...and Corey Perry was born. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Megalodon (@MegalodonBOC) <a href="https://twitter.com/MegalodonBOC/statuses/454099865690451968">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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You can guess what happened next.

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Mayonnaise achieves sentience. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Megalodon (@MegalodonBOC) <a href="https://twitter.com/MegalodonBOC/statuses/454103203924439040">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-cards="hidden" lang="en"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a> <a href="http://t.co/tHLHLJg2Al">http://t.co/tHLHLJg2Al</a></p>&mdash; Ryan Thomas (@rthomas_22) <a href="https://twitter.com/rthomas_22/statuses/454102029409853440">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Ursula from Little Mermaid stole his soul <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Nut (@DoctorGonzzzo) <a href="https://twitter.com/DoctorGonzzzo/statuses/454107051572998144">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Catching up on <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23Cosmos&amp;src=hash">#Cosmos</a>.  Looks like they are finally tackling the most important question, the <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23perryoriginstories&amp;src=hash">#perryoriginstories</a>. <a href="http://t.co/bPehdbfZka">pic.twitter.com/bPehdbfZka</a></p>&mdash; Crispy  (@cjbarresi75) <a href="https://twitter.com/cjbarresi75/statuses/455912047826317312">April 15, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>kinky Pokemon orgy. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Dusty Snickers (@SuicidePass) <a href="https://twitter.com/SuicidePass/statuses/456630681712340992">April 17, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Ted Bundy had a conjugal visit with Lisa Lampanelli <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; SJ (@stace_ofbase) <a href="https://twitter.com/stace_ofbase/statuses/463523524280188928">May 6, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>The mixed juices of a blowjob from a prostitute with meth mouth. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Mike FAIL (@mikeFAIL) <a href="https://twitter.com/mikeFAIL/statuses/463529208912683008">May 6, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>Slime mold got ambitious. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Ian Evans (@shampeon) <a href="https://twitter.com/shampeon/statuses/463530744476741634">May 6, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>The bad guy from Roger Rabbit ejac’d into a hyena <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Torque Penderloin (@AndrewCieslak) <a href="https://twitter.com/AndrewCieslak/statuses/454100226622488576">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-conversation="none" lang="en"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/MegalodonBOC">@MegalodonBOC</a> One of Jeremy Roenick&#39;s hemorrhoids came to life. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Fear The Fin (@fearthefin) <a href="https://twitter.com/fearthefin/statuses/454102164348993536">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>a homeless woman took what she thought was a dump in a park trashcan <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Ryan Dunn (@NotDeadRyanDunn) <a href="https://twitter.com/NotDeadRyanDunn/statuses/454100663044042752">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>An over-hormoned KFC featherless hyper-chicken learned how to play hockey. <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23PerryOriginStories&amp;src=hash">#PerryOriginStories</a></p>&mdash; Megalodon (@MegalodonBOC) <a href="https://twitter.com/MegalodonBOC/statuses/454101178855735296">April 10, 2014</a></blockquote>
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Clearly, poor Corey saw these and has been rattled ever since. Now he takes his frustrations out on others. But he's also distracted, confused, and disoriented. We can only pray for him.

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The Kings scored early again and went into a shell for the rest of the game. Well, they really spent the whole game is a defensive shell actually, and just happened to score twice. And they won! Again! Maybe they'll feel like playing this game. Who knows?

Prediction: They probably won't.