Jasen Vinlove-USA TODAY Sports

A List of Things Martin Brodeur Is Doing Instead of Showing Up to Practice:

  • Sailing a boat to Tahiti, solo, to commune with the sea.
  • Baking cookies with real lard.
  • Eating said cookies in one sitting.
  • Leaving heavy breathing voicemails on Dominik Hasek's phone.
  • Waiting impatiently at Lambert Airport. Still.
  • Compiling his Best of 1997 music list
  • World Juniors (not a hockey thing)
  • Doing that terrible 1920's Reporter bullshit at NFL Media Days (not on purpose, he's old, you see)
  • Dunk contest (cookies, again)
  • Sending 100 pizzas to Ed Belfour's house.
  • Driving 25 in a 50 with his god damned turn signal on.

This FanPost was posted by a fan, and it probably sucks and is dumb.

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