Kings Gameday: That other New York

Somehow, some way the Islanders have managed to turn a four championship dynasty into the most forgettable history possible. Yet these days you can't seem to avoid hearing about how good the Islanders are going to be. "They're the up and coming team!" "They are future champs!" "I'd fuck the shit out of this team!" Yada yada yada. Now the Kings aren't exactly a dynasty, except if you ask Sports Illustrated, but at least they've won something before they started getting talked up. The Islanders are only on par currently with this shit:

Yet, exactly like the Atlanta Thrashers, they haven't accomplished shit in reality, which makes garnering that much praise the most impressive feat they have accomplished. Well, that and I cured someone's insomnia by trying to talk about the Islanders with them. So way to go Islanders! You're like glorified NyQuil.

I suppose another accomplishment they have is being worse than the New York Rangers while also being better than they are. Jaroslav Halak had to bust his ass all last year and stood on his head, but nope. Henrik Lundqvist is the sexy orange Swede who is still "better". Nick Leddy and Johnny Boychuk were massive additions to the Islanders's defensive corps, but somehow Ryan McDonagh was the breakout top tier defenseman when in fact he is terrible and I hate him. Okay, I may be biased because McDonagh is dragging down my fantasy team, but he is still overrated so there. John Tavares is miles better than whoever the hell they have playing center on the Rangers too, but somehow you still forget he even exists. It's remarkable that a team with a few standout stars get overlooked by shittier more expensive players, but that's what happens when you don't win anything I guess.

The Kings find themselves in the inconsistency zone yet again, which isn't shocking. However, they are upping their level of inconsistency to where it is every other period now.

The Whoa! Prediction: John Tavares winds up like Matt Harvey. In that he gets really fat and loses the Stanley Cup Final for the Islanders in the last minute. Dustin Brown slides into Frans Nielsen and breaks his leg too.