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Sharks Gameday: Baby, let's do this for old time's sake

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Hey Red Wings. Things haven't been the same since you left. For both of us. Let's get together one more time for old time's sake.

Patrick Marleau, stumbling and falling awkwardly to the ice
Patrick Marleau, stumbling and falling awkwardly to the ice
Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images

Hey Red Wings,

I know you've got your thing going on in the Eastern Conference now, and you say that it's what you always wanted, and it makes you happy. I'm not in a position to judge. It's just, things haven't been the same since you left. For both of us. I mean, it hasn't been awful, but it isn't the same. Maybe tonight, just this once, we can get back together and have some fun for old time's sake.

I miss how you don't call me a "San Francisco f----t" in your comment threads nearly as often, and even when you do, you don't seem to have the same vitriol. I miss watching Patrick Marleau enrage you with his breakaway goals. I miss seeing Pavel Datsyuk dance around with the puck, and he knows that I'm watching, but I can't do anything about it. I miss the whining about high hits when you cheered Darren McCarty for years and years. I miss Cheechoo (Cheechoo!) demolishing rebounds in the crease against goalies with weird masks, and how much he basked in the glow of it. I miss Zetterberg's limpid lapis lazuli eyes. I miss how Nabokov would let in shit goals even in blowout wins against you. I miss Holstrom's big ol' interfering ass.

I know, we've all moved on. We're all older now. Lidstrom's gone, and Pavel and Henrik aren't quite the same. Same thing with Joe and Patty. But maybe, maybe just tonight, for old time's sake. Should I come over?

-Sharks

Sharks @ Red Wings
4:30 PM Pacific

Prediction: The magic doesn't come back, and we're all left disappointed and alone.