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Ducks Gameday: Gross

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What Crosby does in the off-season. Penguins @ Ducks.

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Presented without comment:

George Murray Levick, a scientist, spent nearly three years studying the breeding cycle and habits of the adelie penguins ... As a proper gentleman, Levick was completely unprepared for what he would encounter. What he saw was shocking and never heard of before in the animal kingdom. The sexual activities of penguins were perverted, cruel and gruesome ...  [T]hey would also force baby penguin chicks into sex, occasionally killing some in the process. But this was only the tip of the iceberg as far as the sexual depravity of the adelie penguins goes ...

[H]e witnessed males having sex with the corpses of females, some of which had died the previous year. Not only did they have sex with long dead corpses, but if they killed another penguin during sex they would continue to have sex until they were done. When Levick discovered this unusual sexual behavior, especially the fact that penguins practice necrophilia, he marked his work 'Not for Publication.' But later researchers were to not only rediscover his findings, but find even more outlandish sexual activity ... The later researchers found that not only do penguins practice necrophilia, but they will even have sex with just part of the deceased animals body. What the researchers done first to test Levicks findings was place a dead, frozen female in a submissive pose. The males found the dead female penguin too tempting and had sex with the corpse. Not yet finished, they took just the head of a dead penguin and placed it with some rocks. Again, the males were turned on and had sex with the head. Just the head!

The researchers, like Levick before them put the sexual behavior of penguins down to sexually frustrated, immature and inexperienced males. They were even seen having sex with the ground and rocks until they had ejaculated.

Gameday

Pittsburgh Penguins @ Anaheim Ducks

Sunday, Dec 6, 2015, 8:00 PM EST

Honda Center - Anaheim, CA

Prediction

Pittsburgh fucks Anaheim to death.

Inspirational Music

To take up space in my gameday posts this season, so that I don't have to write so much, you'll be getting a glimpse of my playlist while I write this garbage.

Today I'm listening to: NIN - "Closer

Nine Inch Nails: Closer (Uncensored) (1994) from Nine Inch Nails on Vimeo."