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Sharks Gameday: The Boy is Mine

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Back off flyera, monica, other various teams

"baecock" - Anthrax Jones
"baecock" - Anthrax Jones
Jerome Miron-USA TODAY Sports

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After this season is over, Mike Babcock's contract with the Detroit Red Wings will expire. It's pretty obvious that because the Red Wings have been so successful for so long, they are ready to pass down Michael to a less fortunate team. As you very well know, the Sharks are extremely unfortunate at this current state in time.

The Sharks are currently sitting in 11th place in the Western Conference, going all fuckin' rogue on the season. Tanking? Not really. Winning? Sometimes. Losing? Most of the time. This team is so misguided that they don't even know how to tank right.

I like to think of the Sharks as the city of Detroit in Robocop (real Robocop, none of that fake bullshit Robocop). While the coaching staff pretty much knows it's over for them in the offseason, and is not trying to control the team at all, the team is running a muck; they're winning games when they're not supposed to, Patty isn't missing open nets anymore, Barclay Goodrow held up another train, guys named Chris Tierney are scoring, etc.

The only person who can eradicate the Sharks' out of control behavior and make them become actually winners is Mike Babcock and there's not doubt in my mind that he will be the Sharks' head coach next season.

The Sharks basically used to play Babcock's system before McLellan (ex-coworker of Mikey) started being questionable as fuck and slap fighting with Doug Wilson all the time. It's not like it will be anything new to them, besides the fact that it will be REALLY SO MUCH BETTER because it is Mike Babcock.

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p>WOW <a href=""></a></p>&mdash; Mike Darnay (@MikeDarnay) <a href="">March 28, 2015</a></blockquote>

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Another reason that the Sharks will be coached by Mike Babcock is because I heard from a source that he would prefer to finally live in the beautiful, sunny California. Getting a tan is not really an option in Michigan and it's something he has always wanted to do.

Some people think that Babcock will just go to any old team

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p><a href="">@KyleWIIM</a> pretty soon Babcock will be piling up wins at the Wells Fargo Center though </p>&mdash; Scott T. (@NHLFlyera) <a href="">March 14, 2015</a></blockquote>

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But yeah he will never go to the flyera but don't worry, Shea Webba will be back one day.


San Jose Sharks @ Philadelphia Flyers

10:00am PST (the fuck is this)

The Andrew MacDonald Memorial Center



Mike Babcock announces this morning that he will be coaching the Sharks. Sharks continue tanking process for Mikey.

Setting the Tone:

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I think I posted this already but it won't leave my head pls call 911

Tweet(s) of the Day:

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-conversation="none" lang="en"><p><a href="">@stace_ofbase</a> <a href="">@NHLFlyera</a> wow you guys <a href=""></a></p>&mdash; Mike Darnay (@MikeDarnay) <a href="">March 28, 2015</a></blockquote>

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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-conversation="none" lang="en"><p>wow what is this <a href="">@stace_ofbase</a> <a href="">@MikeDarnay</a> <a href=""></a></p>&mdash; Scott T. (@NHLFlyera) <a href="">March 28, 2015</a></blockquote>

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Awful Hockey Tattoo of the Day:

Cool tattoo, NHLflyera