♫ ♪ ♫
Jonas is back and there's gonna be trouble
(Hil-ler, Hil-ler, our ex-goalie's back!)
♫ ♪ ♫
Actually, if the version of Jonas Hiller with the huge five-hole and ungodly rebounds at the worst possible moments shows up for this series, it should work out just fine. 50%-50% chance we get that one, I suppose.
So we're on to the second round, and... wait, what is this shit?! Another relocated Atlanta team to face? What is it with these assholes?
At any rate, let's take a look at the BoC archives and see what we here have learned about the Flames over the years (click the links for more info)...
- They owe all of their current success to Brandon Bollig.
- Johnny Hockey is a god damn fraud and his name isn't even Johnny Hockey.
- Beloved franchise icon Lanny McDonald is a criminal.
- Everyone in the city is constantly thieving from one another.
- I don't know... here's some shit about, uh, Craig Conroy.
Okay, I guess what I really learned about the Flames is that, despite how often the California teams play them, none of us really like to blog about them. This is true of the the old Earl/Rudy/Megalodon guard, and it's true of Stace, Dunn, and myself today. When I did this same preview for the Winnipeg Jets last round, I found all sorts of interesting things about that terrible team and city.
I hope this series only goes two games, I'm already out of stuff to write about this team.
Regular Season Series Gameday Posts
In keeping with the theme, I worked really hard this season to avoid writing about the Flames...
Nov 18, Ducks @ Flames: Up in Flames (Flames 4-3 SO)
Nov 25, Flames @ Ducks: Lanny McDonald Is A God Damn Criminal (Ducks 3-2)
Jan 21, Flames @ Ducks: Stace Is Not As Cool As She Thinks She Is (Ducks 6-3)
Feb 20, Ducks @ Flames: Why Ovechkin Cares So Much About Getzlaf's Hair (Ducks 6-3)
Mar 11, Ducks @ Flames: Comments of the Week (Flames 6-3)
Flames @ Ducks
Thursday, Apr 30, 2015, 7:00 PM PDT
I still won't have anything to write about for game 2.