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Sharks Gameday: I love you, Edmonton Oilers

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Never ever fucking change

Bob Stanton-USA TODAY Sports

The Sharks are eliminated, all hope is lost, etc etc, but I have a reason to smile. A reason to live again. A reason to love the sport that I have loathed for almost a year now.

That reason is the Edmonton Oilers.

Something that seemed to be a pipe dream, something that seemed to be nothing short of a miracle, something that seemed to only happen in those romantic comedies has happened.

The Oilers embarrassed the Kings. Not only did they embarrass the Kings, they did it in the last week of the season, during a tight playoff race, while the Kings are on the outside looking in.

/takes cold shower

Even to add more comic relief, the Oilers let in a goal at the red line! God, I love you little misfits. Bless your souls.

The Sharks lost to the Oilers twice already this season but who cares they suck. This is the best week of my life. The Sharks finally ripped off the band-aid and they're done and I don't have to worry about that shitty team until June. I get to just sit back and watch 16 fan bases have clenched buttholes. I get to hate on teams and have people say "AT LEAST MY TEAM CAN MAKE THE PLAYOFFS!" I can't wait. This is a whole new experience as a hockey fan. Instead of people talking at me about choking, they'll just be like "your team fucking sucks" and I'll be like "hell yeah boy, let's drink some beers!" I am #so #blessed #soblessed

This is like clowegate to the 10th power. I love you Oilers. I hope you make the playoffs in the next couple of decades.

And Los Angeles, lol, fuck you

And Calgary, for the love of God, don't put the fate of the playoffs in the Sharks' hands. DO THE THING.



San Jose Sharks @ Edmonton Oilers

6:30pm PST

Taylor Hall Boating Emporium



Oilers win 69-0.

Setting the Tone:

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Let's just listen to this album all day and cry, ya feel me?

Tweet of the Day:

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" lang="en"><p><a href="">@stace_ofbase</a> umm, yes?</p>&mdash; Joffrey Lupul (@JLupul) <a href="">April 6, 2015</a></blockquote>

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God damn, I'm still dyin

Awful Hockey Tattoo of the Day:

I don't even know