FanPost

Patrick Marleau's Capri Sun Power-Ranking

"Why did God make lizards?" - Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

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Greetings trash baby readers of Battle of California! It is I, your prodigal son, in a Twitter exile. I've appeared here, in a hazmat suit, to avoid any potential contamination from this trash site so that I can share a list. Not just any list, but Patrick Marleau's favourite Capri Sun flavours . We all know Patty loves to chill with a juice bag, watching HGTV, commenting on the happy couples finding their dream home. But what are Patty's favourite flavours? Let's find out!

PATTY MARLEAU'S TOP FIVE CAPRI SUN FLAVOURS!

1. Fruit Crush Apple and Pear

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Sometimes after a tough game, I like to kick back with an "appy and pear"! That's what I like to call them, but my wife doesn't call them that. I'll turn on Nickelodeon and maybe drink four or five of them but sometimes my kids get mad that I drink all of them. One time when I drove to Las Vegas for the NHL Awards, the casino didn't have any and I was sad. I would even go as far as getting an appy and pear tattoo.

2. Safari Fruits Juice Drink

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Wowee! I love this one too, almost as much as appy and pear! Sometimes I like to dress up like I'm on a safari and drink one of these! One time I was playing Safari Hero (a game where I'm a hero in Africa) and I scared my dog and he was upset! But then it was sort of like me taking on a wild animal when he was barking at me. I can't wait until my new safari costume arrives.

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3. Apple Juice Drink

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Sometimes you just gotta drink some appy juice! Woweee, okay so sometimes when Coach would ask us to go do pee tests, I would put some of my Capri Sun in the pee cup, and then I would drink it in front of coach! OUT OF THE PEE CUP! Oh boy, oh boy and that's when they stripped me of my captaincy :(

4. Summer Berries Juice Drink

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This is my favourite Capri Sun to mix with alcohol! I don't drink often, but when I do, I really like lite beers. Summer Berries and Michelob Ultra is really good together. I have two sips and I'm so dizzy! Sometimes it's also really good when you're doing a crossword and your brain gets frazzled. One time I put one in the freezer and made a slushie!

5. Orange Peace Juice Drink

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This is a picture of me super excited to drink orange-peach! Wowee! I sent this into Capri Sun and guess what?! THEY SENT ME TWO BOXES FOR FREE! I drank so much I got a tummy ache and I had to lay down. It's really good and it was my first flavour of Capri Sun I ever tried. I'm going to drink one right now!

And there you have it, folks: Patrick Marleau's Capri Sun Power-Ranking. What an adorable scamp.

This FanPost was posted by a fan, and it probably sucks and is dumb.