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Circle of Jerks: Dunn on Stace

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Look! New content! Just kidding, it's Circle of Jerks

that's not how you jerk
that's not how you jerk

There are few things worse in this world than trying to be civil with Sharks fans, and writing the Circle of Jerks posts. This week, we have an unfortunate display of both. Please call your congressperson and demand that these stop. Anyways, here is championship-less blogger of San Jose, Stache of Blanche.

What do you expect out of Peter Deboer this season? He has to be worse than McLellan right?

I expect him to have the most profitable discount jewelry outlet in San Jose. I mean, probably? I don’t think I’ve watched a Devils’ game in at least two seasons. I heard he is really into old players and Hannan is out of the picture so the oldest players (by me guessing and not actually checking and also the fact that I can’t remember who is actually on the Sharks) is probably Martin, Ward, Marleau and Thornton. I’m fine with them getting all the minutes.

I thought the Devils contracted after the 2012 season? This has been highly educational actually.

Joel Ward fills a role that hasn't been filled since Mike Grier. That of a productive 2nd/3rd line RW. Do you think the Sharks can ever use his "clutchness"?

Please stop trying to sound smart, it’s really unattractive. Yes they will win 69 championships.

None of this made sense, but it's okay because I decided to weigh in Nikki Minaj vs Taylor Swift instead over at YouTube. I think I am having my opinions really gain some traction there.

Since Captain John Scott has moved to the desert, what sort of changes do you expect to see with the Coyotes, Glendale, and Arizona?

Now this is a good question. I’d imagine that the Phoenix Coyotes will finally become wildly popular when a video of him bench pressing John McCain on top of the Snoopy rock in Sedona goes viral. Bettman is so impressed by his decision to keep a team in Arizona that he moves Winnipeg to Phoenix. Not the team, the province.

I stopped reading after you called them the "Phoenix Coyotes" when everyone knows they are the Arizona Coyotes. WeedLover6969 at YouTube was right! Girls know nothing about sports. I can't believe this. Next she'll want me to explain offsides and icing, which is terrible because I have no idea what those are.

Well, this has been highly informative and miserable. Only 50 billion more days until hockey.