I have a new series at Battle of California that will center around the nicest things about hockey in this state. This new series (which may only have one installment, who knows) will look at super important topics every time. I hope the skate down memory lane will be mostly awful and not enjoyable at all, myself included.
The Sharks do have some of the best jerseys in all of sports, mostly due to their great color scheme of Playoff Tears Teal, Reverse Sweep Silver, and Golf Outing Orange. Teal is underused by teams except by every expansion team in the 1990s, which coincidentally was the last time Sharks fans had any hope.
Without further ado, here are the four nicest Sharks jerseys:
4. Dany Heatley Sharks jersey
In 2009, Heatley demanded to get the hell out of Ottawa (like any normal person would do) and then used his no-trade clause to nix going to Edmonton (again, like any normal person would do). The fucking all-star actually put up a respectable line of 65-81-146 in two seasons with the Sharks. To further his Sharks legacy, he contributed to just one win out of nine games in the 2010 and 2011 Conference Finals.
Our hero demanded a trade again after realizing that even stanchions were against the Sharks, but he could only refuse a trade to ten different teams. Idiotically, Minnesota was not one of the ten. He was stuck in irrelevancy for three seasons, before agreeing to a one-year deal to play in The O.C. (he calls it that). More shockingly, the Ducks were able to sneak him with a third-round pick to Florida in exchange for Tomas Fleischmann in a "big name trade."
Oh, and he killed a guy while driving drunk once, making it more all the more confusing that he was not given a PTO by the Blues this offseason.
3. 2015 Stadium Series jersey
Not much to say about this one, the shoulder patch was very nice, but any jersey in which you go winless while wearing is great. They even had two more shots at it while indoors, but lost to a McDonald's cartoon character and a goalie who broke his foot at a Rise Against concert.
2. 2014-present Joe Thornton jersey
Joe Thornton was stripped of his captaincy for personally blowing a 3-0 series lead to the Los Angeles Kings. One could say icing a line of Andrew Desjardins-Raffi Torres-Mike Brown led to it, but Thornton's team-leading (team-hindering?) minus-6 rating says it all. Again I'm right in my analysis.
More amazingly, Thornton and general manager Doug Wilson have publicly gone after each other, and over 16 months since it was 3-0, both are still employed by the Sharks. God bless that organization.
1. "Free Raffi" jersey, 2013
After totally undeservingly being suspended 21 games for his hit on Marian Hossa, Raffi Torres nicely introduced his shoulder to criminal Jarret Stoll's head. Once again, he was unfairly suspended for no reason. Fans were rightfully angry, even to the point where spending over $200 on a protest jersey was a completely justifiable idea. The Sharks truly have some of the best fans in all of hockey. They are great.