Sharks Gameday: Azsholes

We have a super-secret, super-secure deep-web chatroom where the BoC writers trade Bitcoin for drugs and murder, and also talk shit about each other, other blogs, and our particularly dumb readers (but not you, of course). It's sort of like a BoC within the BoC. The other day Jer mistyped "assholes" as "azsholes" because he is using some bullshit Windows tablet or something, but suddenly the laws of the universe were revealed and I tapped into the beautiful interconnected consciousness that runs through us all like a golden thread: Arizona is full of azsholes.

This was during the John Scott Affair, where the Coyotes suddenly decided that their coolest player, a nearly retired veteran face-puncher with career points in the single digits who they sought out and signed during the off-season (and whose wife was expecting twins any day), was suddenly so much of a liability that they needed to immediately package him in a trade to Montreal so he could be sent to Newfoundland, an isolated rock populated by puck-touching cod kissers (it sounds cooler than it is). What a bunch of azsholes.

Arizona is the Florida of the West. I don't even need to provide supporting evidence: as soon as you read that, you recognized the truth.

You're going to see a lot more Garbutt around here

This morning, the reigning GM of the year in Anaheim traded a skilled forward for Ryan Garbutt. I was wondering when Chicago's luck was going to change. Those guys just haven't been able to catch a break. This trade is amazing. Adding Garbutt to the Ducks roster is spectacular because they're cornering the market on loathsome pieces of shit. I can't wait for Steve Ott to end up in Anaheim.

Sharks @ Coyotes

6:00 PM Pacific

Prediction: We are all stardust and energy from the Big Bang, but some of us are fucking azsholes.