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This is a cacophony of shit

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what the ever loving crap

well, the place exploded that's too bad
well, the place exploded that's too bad

So the NHL decided they didn't have enough superfluous franchises. And Las Vegas got one! Cool! Right? Sure. Going to Las Vegas for hockey is going the route of the outdoor games. One event a year is perfect. Dickhead hockey fans from all over (okay mostly from California) would descend like a plague of thirsty, eager to spend locusts, and it would be a fun little way to wrap up the Summer and get ready for hockey season.

Now we have this shit all the time. The NHL has about two franchises too many already as it is. As to what two get contracted, and who deserves relocation is matter of great debate. The league is already watered down as it is though, what with teams in places like Ottawa and Winnipeg, and struggling locales like Arizona and Carolina. Shit, Anaheim and Los Angeles have been semi-successful teams and I can still get tickets for twelve dollars most of the time.

The thrill of Las Vegas hockey trips is as dead as democracy, just like the aforementioned outdoor game. Now everyone gets one. Oh, and my mistake. It's "Vegas". Not "Las Vegas" just "Vegas". And their team name? Not just a ripoff of the Kings, but also a colorful injection of bullshit. The Vegas Golden Knights. Golden Showers used to be something sacred and now they get a whole damn night dedicated to them. Also, please try to ignore that the logo, while admittedly pretty cool, IS NOT A GOD DAMN KNIGHT'S HELMET.


Hmmm nope not even close. Those helmets clearly belong on Corinthian soldiers. Leave it to the NHL to remain being culturally insensitive.

I look forward to their games against the Jose Teal Sharks, Angeles Black Kings, and Louis Blue Blues. Their colors as a whole will be gray, black, red, and gold. Sort of like the Senators. Who also have a helmet logo thing. And who are also a forgettable franchise that is completely unnecessary.

Fortunately for Vegas, they are designed to be a strong road fan team, sort of like Arizona and Florida. Fans will travel there all the time and have transplanted fans be the supporting life blood of the franchise. Because that always works. as evidenced by past successes.

Prediction: The Angeles Black Kings lose to the York Blue Isles 5-4.