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Thee Worst Yule Log Videos on Yon Internet

There must be something weird about the human brain and fire. How else can you explain Yule Log videos? When you watch one, you’re not enjoying the warm glow of a crackling fire on a cold, winter day as you’re curled up in a bulky sweater on a couch. You’re staring at a screen. Even weirder when it’s a big-ass screen.

This particular photo is great mostly because of the clear divide between the people trying to make the photo “funny” (using two hands, smiling) and the ones who just want to get this stupid photo over with (one hand, no smile). Bonus points to the two women on the bottom who don’t know how to roast marshmallows.

Anyway, here are some awful yule log videos on Youtube.

This one features the comedic stylings of that guy at the office who loooooves reciting comedy bits to you, delivered with the talent and competence of a community theater production in a small, rural town. There is no reason to listen to this, because the joke is in the title: Yule Log with Christmas Music and Loud Family Fighting. Except, the “loud family fighting” part is just little pissy bits of back-and-forth arguing between a man and a woman.

Hey, have you ever stared at a fire and thought to yourself, “this is nice, but what if I could watch and hear the sounds of disgusting breakfast sausage being cooked while I’m at it?” No, me neither, but somebody at Jimmy Dean Sausage thought you had. It’s 11 hours of sizzlin’ meat, glowing embers, and poorly done graphics.

Ahahaha. Homeless people have a shitty life that we’re going to mine for laffs. Classic stuff here, bros.

Trying Way Too Hard with This Guy.

Farting Yule Log. It’s fart noises.

Oh, that topical political humor!

The Psychedelic Yule Log is only 2 minutes long, but it feels like hours. Just atrocious.

I’m not even going to bother with the almost countless yule log videos that consist of someone pointing a camera at their fireplace and then adding in their favorite Brad Paisley or Kenny Chesney holiday songs. Petabytes of storage are devoted to these things with like 275 views over the last 5 years, and you have to watch a commercial before even seeing them. This world is bewildering.

Flames @ Sharks

7:30 PM Pacific

Prediction: Yule log videos continue to be a humor black hole from which nothing can escape.