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Alberta is a majestic place, with mountains, glaciers, forests, an extraction-industry created hellscape, plains, whatever the Canadian equivalent of backwards hick shitheads is, and wildlife. Alberta also has Johnny Gaudreau, everyone's favorite 5th grader.
I was thinking about why Flames fans love him so much while looking through pictures of the flora and fauna of Alberta, and noticed something strange. Do you see it?
It's subtle, but if you look closely, you might spot it.
And then here.
And here too.
Once you notice it, it's hard to see anything else.
No wonder they love him so much. Seems like a nightmare, though.
Sharks @ Flames
6:00 PM Pacific
Prediction: The constant talking by the wildlife is too much to take, and the Alberta tourism board shuts down.