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I am here to talk to you about the Stanley Cup Final

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wtf

scoring in your DMs like
scoring in your DMs like
Don Wright-USA TODAY Sports

I never thought I would see the day where I was writing a post about the Sharks in the Stanley Cup Final on Battle of California but here I am. I'm in A Mood because today has been A Day so I'll be keeping the smartassery to a minimum. If you were interested in smartassery about the Penguins, please click this link.

One game at a time. Just focus on today and win, and the Sharks are one game away from the Stanley Cup. Just like the Penguins. Except for the Penguins, they would have wasted two opportunities to eliminate this shorky team, and blew it. We've all been Shorks fans for a while now...and we know how debilitating it can be to lose multiple elimination games in one series..............................................................................

I don't really have anything against the Penguins besides hating mayonnaise and hating Toronto people who act like they collectively pooled their DNA together and created Phil Kessel. It would be nice to be on the other side of this narrative for once and seeing how Pittsburgh fans react to losses and even wins would make a Stanley Cup win even more delightful.

With all of that being said just win. Win it for Jumbo. Win it for Patty. Win it for Joely. Win it for Neil Young. Win it for Kristi Yamaguchi. Win it for me, your favorite all time semi-retired shorks blogger, Stace. Neil, Kristi and myself have waited far too long for a Shorks cup and we talk about it constantly when we meet at the Country Club.

If you are going to the game tonight, cheer with all of your heart, because you likely sold organs to be able to afford, and don't be dumb, because that is Vancouver's duty. Show off the hockey town that is San Jose (please do not think that this is an invitation to wear flip flops to the hockey game, nobody wants to see your nasty feet, tech nerds).

The possession numbers look grim for the Sharks, but who cares. If there was any puck luck in games one or two for the Sharks, they could have a Stanley Cup right this very second. This series have been about bounces, and besides, the Sharks winning the cup because of PDO will make the stats community meltdown and that would be another plus.

The bottomline is stranger things have happened in the playoffs (how the hell did Anaheim draw OTTAWA in the cup final?) and the Sharks winning is not out of the question. I've been overly confident about this team since the playoffs started and I'm not going to stop being optimistic until a fourth game is won.

Go Shorks. I love you Martin Jones.

STANLEY CUP FINAL GAMEDAY

San Jose Sharks vs. Pittsburgh Penguins

5:00 PM PST

Sad Asshole Patrol Center

NBC

Prediction

Sharks win 3-1. Game Winner from Joel Ward because tale as old as time. Sidney Crosby gets blamed for everything.

Stanley Cup Final Jam

Tweet of the Day

Tattoo of the Day

Prayers to this guy who got a flesh-eating bacteria because of the awful light blue penguins jersey