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Pin Pals!

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oh ho ho so clever wait the Simpsons did this joke ah crap

Colorado Avalanche v Los Angeles Kings
yes you
Photo by Harry How/Getty Images

When you get to be a big time hot shot blogger who also is ridiculously good looking with a full head of hair like myself, you get perks. And it is apparent that the Kings organization knows where the talent is at! You know why?

BECAUSE I GET FREE SHIT.

Earlier this year, the Kings were handing out Drew Doughty winning the Norris trophy because it’s funny as hell trolling everyone else in the league. They got Drew in all his homeless lookin’ perfection with an award he lords over everyone with now.

lol trophies

But guess what? There’s other perfect trollin’ pins you can get. Though I already have them, therefore making me significantly cooler than you. You poor plebes have to go to tonight’s game if you want one of these kick ass Darryl Sutter flashin’ gang signs pins.

for my dawgs

Yep that one is tonight. But I already got it! Sucks to be you. Better go get one (keep sending me stuff Kings).

Wait, you think that is all? NOPE. Check out this elite pin of this elite goalie, you sack of sad.

ELITE

They got the Jonathan Quick drunk squint eyed look down perfectly. This one isn’t tonight though. Nope, just Homie D. Sutz pin for this evening’s game against the Avalanche. Jonathan Quick giving you the death stare like you’re Joe Thornton and Jon feels a hangover creeping in is on March 2nd against the Toronto Maple Leafs. They got that Auston Matthews kid too! Angry Quick pins and Mexican-American superstars in Canada. It’s like a NAFTA jamboree up in here.

It’s not like they hand these out to any hack keyboard artist either!

Son. Of. A. Bitch.

Well, go get a pin regardless. Hopefully this good behavior lets the Kings decide to send me on a food promo for a game. I’ll bring my own tums.

Prediction: You get an awesome pin to try and be as cool as me. The pin helps. Kings still lose 4-3.